FicWad

Cameron couldn't forget the moment she knew that something was wrong with him. She had been sitting at the table with the rest of the team and concentrating hard on the test results in front of her. The case seemed to be a very complex one which was something that she was, of course, used to. There was nothing that seemed different in House's voice except maybe a tad more urgency than usual. He was writing on the board all the symptoms while he spoke. "A forty something year old male with what seems to be a neuromuscular degeneration. The patient presented with weakness in both legs which has since progressed to his hands and arms. No familiar history that would indicate a genetic mutation....." he trailed off, deep in thought, his right hand clasping the marker stopped in mid air. He continued, "Fever this morning of 99.6, headache, one instance of vomiting. Nothing too dramatic I know. Idea's?" His voice commanded attention and they all looked up. "And no one better utter the word Lupus!" he said, rolling his eyes at the thought. "Duchenes Muscular Dystrophy sounds plausible." Foreman said, "although his sed rate isn't too high." "Could be a simple black widow spider bite" Chase added. "No to both" he said to them. House turned back to the board and seemed to stare into space. Cameron studied him. His right hand was trembling slightly as he wrote more symptoms on the board. "Malaise, stiff neck..." he trailed off yet again, rubbing his right hand with his left. Cameron watched the marker he was holding drop to the floor. She stole a glance over at Dr. Wilson who just happened to walk into the room at that moment. "House..." he said, "can I have a moment?" "Can't it wait we are actually working here. Don't you have someone sick to bother instead?" he didn't even look at him as he spoke. "This is really important House besides," Wilson looked around the table "you have tormented these poor souls enough for now." House sighed and placed the now recovered marker back on the desk. "OK but let's make this quick. Dying people you know." House walked toward Wilson. As much as he tried to hide it from them he couldn't disguise the fact that each step was causing him pain. He seemed to shuffle a bit, at least she thought he did. It was always hard to tell with him. Did he have a bit too much to drink last night? Did he run out of Vicodin? Maybe he didn't get enough sleep last night? These thoughts rumbled through her woman's heart even as her doctor's training was telling her different. She rose from her chair and peered out the door just in time to see him stumble and nearly fall. Only a sudden move on Wilson's part kept him upright. Cameron turned back toward Foreman and Chase who were lost in their notes. "So what room is this patient in anyway?" Chase asked. Cameron whispered under her breath, 'he was in this one.'

House sat in the chair in Wilson's office with his shirt off. "Your lungs don't sound too good House and your pressures up" he said as he took off his stethoscope, "I'm ordering a chest x-ray, a ct scan stat and..." House cut him off sharply, "I know damn well what I need and don't need and what I don't need right now is a bunch of useless tests." Wilson stood back and let him rant. He knew better than to interrupt him when he went off like this. But there was an element of fear in his voice that he never heard before. "House you know you can't keep this hidden from your team or Cuddy for that matter forever. You are going to have to take a bit of a proactive role in figuring out what the hell is going on with your health." "Which is why I have my team working on the problem even as we speak." House seemed to soften a bit as he started to put his shirt back on. "and if you hadn't interrupted us we might have actually made some progress by now." House began to stand up to leave but found his legs didn't want to cooperate. He fell back into the chair. "Ok that's it I am admitting you as a patient," Wilson was adamant, "you can barely walk House and you can't hide it anymore." House tried again to stand and found his balance. He looked at him and Wilson knew that his stubborn friend wasn't ready to admit defeat just yet. "Send the bill to Chase, he just got a raise" he said as he limped out of the room.

One thing House missed the most was riding his motorcycle. He knew it wouldn't be a good thing to do and yet one little part of him really didn't give a damn. He didn't care if he hurt himself he just didn't want to risk hurting anyone else. He let himself into his apartment and grabbed for a double dose of Vicodin. He found he needed more and more of it now that his body was betraying him at every turn. And he was dead tired all the time; just getting up to go to the hospital was becoming more and more of a chore. He knew there were patients that needed him and that his team needed his help....but hell he needed THEIR help now more than ever. He could see the concern on Cameron's face today. She didn't know he was looking at her as he stole a few precious glances her way. So many regrets, he could barely count the number of times he had wanted to tell her the truth about how he felt about her. Damn stubbornness he chided himself. But to be truthful it was really fear that held him back. Fear of rejection, fear of looking like a fool. And this from a man who prided himself on his bravery in the face of insurmountable odds. He didn't feel very brave now. In fact he was terrified. He had some tests run at a different hospital, the same ones that Wilson had demanded he have so he knew that the answer to what was slowly and painfully stealing his life away wasn't to be found on any CT scan or any other type of scan for that matter. No one seemed to know what was wrong, least of all him. Granted he really couldn't be very objective at the moment. What he did know for certainty was that he wasn't getting any better and would only get worse.

Cameron had just gotten out of the shower when she heard a knock at the door. She threw on her robe and walked to it, peering through the peep hole to see who it was. She was surprised to see House standing there, leaning against the door jam. She opened it to let him in but he just stood there, looking at her. Something in his eyes scared her. She tried to put a finger on just what it was then realized that he hadn't made a move to enter her home. He stood suspended there held upright by the wall and stared into her eyes. She always shook inside whenever he caught her eye. The strength of him, his intensity and the deep well of passion that just smoldered underneath the surface shone through those azure blue eyes of his and took her breath away every time. This time however there was something new, an added dimension had been added to the multi-faceted prism that was Dr. Gregory House. And she wasn't quite sure that she liked it. He pushed himself with effort off of the wall and reached a hand out to her. Instinctively she grabbed it and, putting an arm around his waist she helped him inside His arm came around her and he held her around the shoulders for support. How long had she waited to be this close to him she couldn't tell. She could feel the tension in him and could tell that he was not happy to have her helping him this way. The last thing he wanted anyone to see was his weakness. But he had no choice, he couldn't do it without her. Together they maneuvered him over to her couch and she helped him sit down. He threw his cane to the floor and leaned back. Once again he raised his eyes to meet hers and she understood what that other element in his gaze was. It was resignation. Cameron waited for him to speak, to break the spell he had put over her. "I'm dying" he said, so simply that he could have been ordering a drink. "From what? How do you know that you are terminal? There must be some treatment we could try.." she trailed off when he put his finger to her lips. "I am running out of time."