Categories > Games > Final Fantasy X > Drawn Toward Unity
Note: I am so, /so/, sorry that this part is so incredibly late. I got insanely writer's blocked on this part, and only just finally managed to push through it enough to get to the end of the chapter. I meant to put up this interlude and the next chapter at the same time, but since I managed to finish this before bedtime I wanted to at least get it out so everyone reading didn't need to wait any longer.
- - -
Wakka worried about Lulu.
It wasn't a totally new thing, of course. She had been his brother's girl, and, even more than that, she was the first friend he'd ever made, the first girl he'd ever fallen for, and the cause of his first heartbreak when she'd only had eyes for Chappu. So of course he wanted to keep an eye on her when he could, even though he knew she wouldn't appreciate it if she found out.
But, he'd been worrying more lately. Not about her getting injured, or crippled, or killed as he always had in the past, but about her mind.
Being a guardian was a stressful job. Everyone who became one knew going in that it had claimed the sanity of others before them, people who couldn't stand the strain of living their lives for someone they knew would die in the end no matter what they did.
Wakka had never thought that Lulu would become one of those guardians. Especially not if he was still doing all right. Lulu had always been so much stronger than him that he couldn't have imagined her breaking, even though she'd gone on more pilgrimages than most guardians ever did.
Then somewhere along the way she'd found that damned stick. He wasn't sure where it had come from, though he guessed Macalania Forest from the pale color and the way it seemed to shimmer slightly when the light caught it the right way, and he wasn't sure how long she'd been carrying it with her, but he'd noticed days before that she'd begun sneaking away from the group when she thought everyone else was asleep or occupied to whisper to it.
Worse, every time she said something she paused as if she was listening to the stick speak back.
He wanted to grab her by the shoulders and shake her when he saw her doing it, say to her 'Lu, we're so close to being done with all this, you can't break now' then throw the stick into the trench splitting the center of the Calm Lands so no one but the fiends said to live on its bottom would ever see it again. But, if he did that he had no idea how she'd react. Maybe it would make her snap even more to have it taken from her. Maybe she'd turn against him for taking her whatever she thought it was from her. Maybe if he just left her alone she'd get better once the pilgrimage was over and she had a chance to relax.
He'd thought that that was happening already, ever since they'd left Zanarkand. He hadn't seen her touch it once since Rikku's dad had picked them up on the airship, and he'd thought that maybe now that they'd all gotten a good night's sleep for the first time in months and didn't have to walk from dawn to dusk anymore whatever had gone wrong in her mind had been fixed.
That hope had been dashed as they walked through the caves they were travelling through, and out of the corner of his eye he'd caught her fingering the end of the stick hidden in her sleeve, like she was just itching to talk to it about the strange things they were seeing down there.
He picked up his pace to catch up with her, noticing how she pushed it back up into whatever concealed pocket she was keeping it in then let her hands drop to her side at the sound of his steps. "Pretty spooky, isn't it?" he asked as he caught up to her, trying to draw her attention and hoping he'd be able to keep it. "Almost feels like Omega'll jump out at us any second now, don't it?"
She looked at him like she thought he'd said something stupid, but at least that was a look he was used to seeing on her. "You realize that that's entirely likely, don't you? I'm not sure I could think of anyone more likely to have become a fiend upon their death than the traitor Omega. ...Perhaps the High Summoners, considering everything else we've learned of Yevon lately." For a moment an expression of sorrow flickered across her face then was smoothed away so completely that anyone who didn't know her as well as Wakka did would have thought it was gone completely.
But she could never fool him like that. Not when he was paying attention, anyway.
"Nah," he said, falsely jovial though he knew it wouldn't fool her anymore than she could him. "They thought they were saving the world, right? If anything's gonna make you accept dying enough to go right to the Farplane without a sending, that's gotta be it, don't 'cha think?" He slung an arm around her shoulders and was surprised by how much better that made him feel, even though he'd meant for it to comfort her. It reminded him of when he was a child and would hold onto her when they hid in the back room of the temple whenever Sin attacked the island. He always told himself that it was to keep her from being afraid, but deep down inside he'd known that he was the one who really felt better when he put on the big, strong, hero act. Still, she'd always allowed him to act like he was protecting her, just like she wasn't shrugging off his arm now.
"Perhaps you're right. We can't allow ourselves to start thinking that everything we've always believed is a lie." Her voice dropped to a whisper so low that he knew he wasn't the one she was speaking to anymore. "That would be too terrible."
He heard the sadness in her voice, felt the stick digging into his side where her arm was pressed against him, and suddenly felt like maybe he was starting to understand. He felt a little stupid for not figuring it sooner, except he knew that of course he never would have thought that that was it. If there was one thing that had happened on the entire pilgrimage that he would never have thought would hit her harder than him, it was everything they'd found out about Yevon. She was, or had been, faithful of course, but she'd always been down to earth about it, willing to overlook sins when she thought they were necessary, or seek help from heathens when she thought it was the best option. She bent, she was flexible, and everyone knew that rigid things were the ones that were supposed to break.
Then he remembered the unsent Ginnem in her cave, and wondered if that was what made the difference. Both his summoners were still alive; he'd never lost anyone in the name of Yevon's lies.
"Y'know, Lu, if you ever need to talk about anything, I'm there for ya," he offered, giving her shoulders a quick squeeze.
She frowned slightly, eyes thoughtful, and for a moment he thought maybe she was going to take him up on the offer. Then she pulled away, turning away from him to face Tidus. "It looks as though they're opening another of those chests. You should be ready to join in if it turns into a monster."
"Yeah... I guess I oughta." He sighed and started jogging to catch up with the rest of the group, but was suddenly stopped by a blast of rancid air so foul it almost sent him crashing to his knees. 'Lulu!' he tried to call out as he whirled around to see what had happened, but he found that his voice had been taken from him, as was his shout when he saw her crumpled on the cave floor in front of a massive tentacled plant.
Where the hell had it /come from/, he wondered as he dashed back to her. Something that big shouldn't have been able to sneak up on them, especially not in the narrow tunnels they were travelling through.
But he didn't have time to think about that now. He got close enough to see the Lulu was still breathing, then threw his blitzball at the plant as hard as he could, unable to risk it attacking again if he took the time to give Lulu a real look-over. As it was reeling back on its tentacles he struck it again, and again, incredibly grateful that he'd kept going to the Auroch's games even though he'd quit the team. If he hadn't he wouldn't have been there to learn with them when the prize for one of the tournaments had been a technique to rapidly throw the ball without losing strength or accuracy.
The others had noticed what was happening by then, he could hear them running up behind him, but he didn't let himself stop until he'd slammed the ball into it twelve times, the most he'd ever been able to manage from that technique before he fumbled and was thrown off his rhythm. Then he darted forward, scooped Lulu up, and pulled back, leaving the others to finish taking out the fiend.
'Lu, c'mon, wake up,' he mouthed, shaking her by her shoulders. For a long moment he thought nothing was going to happen, then her eyes fluttered opened. They didn't focus on him, or /anything/, but at least she was awake.
He was startled by a jar suddenly being thrust in his face. "Here, breathe this," Rikku said, squatting down next to him. He'd been so focused on Lulu that he hadn't even noticed her approaching. "Your voice is gone, right? You fix that, I'll see about her. /Down/, Lulu!" She pushed Lulu back against Wakka from where she had been trying to get up, swaying heavily the whole time. "I think she's confused..." Rikku said, frowning as she pressed her hands against Lulu's forehead and began to concentrate.
Wakka silently let her get to her work as he uncapped the jar and began breathing in the fumes from the ointment, feeling his vocal cords relax and open up again almost immediately. "How's she look?" He asked as soon as he could, though his voice was barely more than a croak.
"It's really bad!" Rikku said, her hands fluttering helplessly in the air. "There's a whole bunch of things wrong with her, I don't even know where to start! Maybe I shouldn't even do anything until she's someplace safe, 'cause if a fiend decided to come take a bite of me while I was distracted with her that'd be both of us down for the count." As she spoke she waved a hand over Lulu's face, testing to see if her eyes could pick up motion, and looked even more worried when she didn't seem aware of it at all. "Why aren't you this messed up if you were hit too?" she asked, while moving on to checking Lulu's pulse.
"Wasn't next to her," he replied. "I just got hit by the last of it, she was right in front of it. I dunno where the damn thing even came from."
"It's a good thing you weren't next to her! If this had happened to both of you, we wouldn't have noticed it happening and it would've gobbled the two of you up! I don't know what I would've told my old man..."
"Eh? What's he got to do with anything?"
"Oh, well, you know..." Rikku twittered nervously and rubbed the back of her head. "He trusts all of you to look out for me! What's he gonna think if two of you get eaten?" She turned her attention back to Lulu, whose eyes seemed clearer but were still darting from place to place without settling on anything, then hopped to her feet. "Okay, I'm taking her back to the airship!" she said decisively. "I'm totally sure she's gonna be okay in a while, but she's too messed up to take care of out here. She needs some rest!"
"Hey, wait a sec!" Wakka protested, unconsciously pulling Lulu closer to himself. "You wouldn't be able to take care of yourself against the fiends in here. No way you'd be able to protect Lu on your own! If anybody's gonna take her, it oughta be me."
"No way! You might be strong, but I'm /sneaky/. I can get Lulu to the airship and get back again without the fiends ever even seeing me!" She leaned forward and poked him in the chest. "Anyway, you think it would be good for her if you had to leave her sitting around defenseless on the ground every time you had to stop and fight? Plus, they're gonna need your help here." She looked back at where the rest of the group were now fighting one of the ruin's giant turtles that had come to see what all the fuss was about.
Wakka slowly released Lulu, unable to argue with that logic. "You're gonna make sure she's settled down okay before coming back, right?"
"Of course!" Rikku lifted Lulu to her feet and started pulling her back the way they'd come, surprisingly quick for someone loaded down with a body bigger than they were. As she dodged around the fight she called back over her shoulder, "Don't worry! My dad'll take real good care of her!"
"Easy for her to say..." he muttered under his breath, then pushed himself to his feet and picked up his blitzball. As he rejoined the fight he prayed, though he no longer knew who to, that she would be safe.
- - -
Wakka worried about Lulu.
It wasn't a totally new thing, of course. She had been his brother's girl, and, even more than that, she was the first friend he'd ever made, the first girl he'd ever fallen for, and the cause of his first heartbreak when she'd only had eyes for Chappu. So of course he wanted to keep an eye on her when he could, even though he knew she wouldn't appreciate it if she found out.
But, he'd been worrying more lately. Not about her getting injured, or crippled, or killed as he always had in the past, but about her mind.
Being a guardian was a stressful job. Everyone who became one knew going in that it had claimed the sanity of others before them, people who couldn't stand the strain of living their lives for someone they knew would die in the end no matter what they did.
Wakka had never thought that Lulu would become one of those guardians. Especially not if he was still doing all right. Lulu had always been so much stronger than him that he couldn't have imagined her breaking, even though she'd gone on more pilgrimages than most guardians ever did.
Then somewhere along the way she'd found that damned stick. He wasn't sure where it had come from, though he guessed Macalania Forest from the pale color and the way it seemed to shimmer slightly when the light caught it the right way, and he wasn't sure how long she'd been carrying it with her, but he'd noticed days before that she'd begun sneaking away from the group when she thought everyone else was asleep or occupied to whisper to it.
Worse, every time she said something she paused as if she was listening to the stick speak back.
He wanted to grab her by the shoulders and shake her when he saw her doing it, say to her 'Lu, we're so close to being done with all this, you can't break now' then throw the stick into the trench splitting the center of the Calm Lands so no one but the fiends said to live on its bottom would ever see it again. But, if he did that he had no idea how she'd react. Maybe it would make her snap even more to have it taken from her. Maybe she'd turn against him for taking her whatever she thought it was from her. Maybe if he just left her alone she'd get better once the pilgrimage was over and she had a chance to relax.
He'd thought that that was happening already, ever since they'd left Zanarkand. He hadn't seen her touch it once since Rikku's dad had picked them up on the airship, and he'd thought that maybe now that they'd all gotten a good night's sleep for the first time in months and didn't have to walk from dawn to dusk anymore whatever had gone wrong in her mind had been fixed.
That hope had been dashed as they walked through the caves they were travelling through, and out of the corner of his eye he'd caught her fingering the end of the stick hidden in her sleeve, like she was just itching to talk to it about the strange things they were seeing down there.
He picked up his pace to catch up with her, noticing how she pushed it back up into whatever concealed pocket she was keeping it in then let her hands drop to her side at the sound of his steps. "Pretty spooky, isn't it?" he asked as he caught up to her, trying to draw her attention and hoping he'd be able to keep it. "Almost feels like Omega'll jump out at us any second now, don't it?"
She looked at him like she thought he'd said something stupid, but at least that was a look he was used to seeing on her. "You realize that that's entirely likely, don't you? I'm not sure I could think of anyone more likely to have become a fiend upon their death than the traitor Omega. ...Perhaps the High Summoners, considering everything else we've learned of Yevon lately." For a moment an expression of sorrow flickered across her face then was smoothed away so completely that anyone who didn't know her as well as Wakka did would have thought it was gone completely.
But she could never fool him like that. Not when he was paying attention, anyway.
"Nah," he said, falsely jovial though he knew it wouldn't fool her anymore than she could him. "They thought they were saving the world, right? If anything's gonna make you accept dying enough to go right to the Farplane without a sending, that's gotta be it, don't 'cha think?" He slung an arm around her shoulders and was surprised by how much better that made him feel, even though he'd meant for it to comfort her. It reminded him of when he was a child and would hold onto her when they hid in the back room of the temple whenever Sin attacked the island. He always told himself that it was to keep her from being afraid, but deep down inside he'd known that he was the one who really felt better when he put on the big, strong, hero act. Still, she'd always allowed him to act like he was protecting her, just like she wasn't shrugging off his arm now.
"Perhaps you're right. We can't allow ourselves to start thinking that everything we've always believed is a lie." Her voice dropped to a whisper so low that he knew he wasn't the one she was speaking to anymore. "That would be too terrible."
He heard the sadness in her voice, felt the stick digging into his side where her arm was pressed against him, and suddenly felt like maybe he was starting to understand. He felt a little stupid for not figuring it sooner, except he knew that of course he never would have thought that that was it. If there was one thing that had happened on the entire pilgrimage that he would never have thought would hit her harder than him, it was everything they'd found out about Yevon. She was, or had been, faithful of course, but she'd always been down to earth about it, willing to overlook sins when she thought they were necessary, or seek help from heathens when she thought it was the best option. She bent, she was flexible, and everyone knew that rigid things were the ones that were supposed to break.
Then he remembered the unsent Ginnem in her cave, and wondered if that was what made the difference. Both his summoners were still alive; he'd never lost anyone in the name of Yevon's lies.
"Y'know, Lu, if you ever need to talk about anything, I'm there for ya," he offered, giving her shoulders a quick squeeze.
She frowned slightly, eyes thoughtful, and for a moment he thought maybe she was going to take him up on the offer. Then she pulled away, turning away from him to face Tidus. "It looks as though they're opening another of those chests. You should be ready to join in if it turns into a monster."
"Yeah... I guess I oughta." He sighed and started jogging to catch up with the rest of the group, but was suddenly stopped by a blast of rancid air so foul it almost sent him crashing to his knees. 'Lulu!' he tried to call out as he whirled around to see what had happened, but he found that his voice had been taken from him, as was his shout when he saw her crumpled on the cave floor in front of a massive tentacled plant.
Where the hell had it /come from/, he wondered as he dashed back to her. Something that big shouldn't have been able to sneak up on them, especially not in the narrow tunnels they were travelling through.
But he didn't have time to think about that now. He got close enough to see the Lulu was still breathing, then threw his blitzball at the plant as hard as he could, unable to risk it attacking again if he took the time to give Lulu a real look-over. As it was reeling back on its tentacles he struck it again, and again, incredibly grateful that he'd kept going to the Auroch's games even though he'd quit the team. If he hadn't he wouldn't have been there to learn with them when the prize for one of the tournaments had been a technique to rapidly throw the ball without losing strength or accuracy.
The others had noticed what was happening by then, he could hear them running up behind him, but he didn't let himself stop until he'd slammed the ball into it twelve times, the most he'd ever been able to manage from that technique before he fumbled and was thrown off his rhythm. Then he darted forward, scooped Lulu up, and pulled back, leaving the others to finish taking out the fiend.
'Lu, c'mon, wake up,' he mouthed, shaking her by her shoulders. For a long moment he thought nothing was going to happen, then her eyes fluttered opened. They didn't focus on him, or /anything/, but at least she was awake.
He was startled by a jar suddenly being thrust in his face. "Here, breathe this," Rikku said, squatting down next to him. He'd been so focused on Lulu that he hadn't even noticed her approaching. "Your voice is gone, right? You fix that, I'll see about her. /Down/, Lulu!" She pushed Lulu back against Wakka from where she had been trying to get up, swaying heavily the whole time. "I think she's confused..." Rikku said, frowning as she pressed her hands against Lulu's forehead and began to concentrate.
Wakka silently let her get to her work as he uncapped the jar and began breathing in the fumes from the ointment, feeling his vocal cords relax and open up again almost immediately. "How's she look?" He asked as soon as he could, though his voice was barely more than a croak.
"It's really bad!" Rikku said, her hands fluttering helplessly in the air. "There's a whole bunch of things wrong with her, I don't even know where to start! Maybe I shouldn't even do anything until she's someplace safe, 'cause if a fiend decided to come take a bite of me while I was distracted with her that'd be both of us down for the count." As she spoke she waved a hand over Lulu's face, testing to see if her eyes could pick up motion, and looked even more worried when she didn't seem aware of it at all. "Why aren't you this messed up if you were hit too?" she asked, while moving on to checking Lulu's pulse.
"Wasn't next to her," he replied. "I just got hit by the last of it, she was right in front of it. I dunno where the damn thing even came from."
"It's a good thing you weren't next to her! If this had happened to both of you, we wouldn't have noticed it happening and it would've gobbled the two of you up! I don't know what I would've told my old man..."
"Eh? What's he got to do with anything?"
"Oh, well, you know..." Rikku twittered nervously and rubbed the back of her head. "He trusts all of you to look out for me! What's he gonna think if two of you get eaten?" She turned her attention back to Lulu, whose eyes seemed clearer but were still darting from place to place without settling on anything, then hopped to her feet. "Okay, I'm taking her back to the airship!" she said decisively. "I'm totally sure she's gonna be okay in a while, but she's too messed up to take care of out here. She needs some rest!"
"Hey, wait a sec!" Wakka protested, unconsciously pulling Lulu closer to himself. "You wouldn't be able to take care of yourself against the fiends in here. No way you'd be able to protect Lu on your own! If anybody's gonna take her, it oughta be me."
"No way! You might be strong, but I'm /sneaky/. I can get Lulu to the airship and get back again without the fiends ever even seeing me!" She leaned forward and poked him in the chest. "Anyway, you think it would be good for her if you had to leave her sitting around defenseless on the ground every time you had to stop and fight? Plus, they're gonna need your help here." She looked back at where the rest of the group were now fighting one of the ruin's giant turtles that had come to see what all the fuss was about.
Wakka slowly released Lulu, unable to argue with that logic. "You're gonna make sure she's settled down okay before coming back, right?"
"Of course!" Rikku lifted Lulu to her feet and started pulling her back the way they'd come, surprisingly quick for someone loaded down with a body bigger than they were. As she dodged around the fight she called back over her shoulder, "Don't worry! My dad'll take real good care of her!"
"Easy for her to say..." he muttered under his breath, then pushed himself to his feet and picked up his blitzball. As he rejoined the fight he prayed, though he no longer knew who to, that she would be safe.
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