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The girl was leering.

The girl. Was. Leering. No open fascination, no slack-jawed hey-you're-really-an-alien awe, no glimmer of fear behind the blind gratitude.

Instead, her eyes widened to an almost absurd degree and she proceeded to take the hand he hadn't realized he was still offering out to help her up.

The girl, and really, he was getting tired of calling her that, pressed a small lime green card into his hand, even as she stroked his thumb lightly. "Niiiiceee." She drawled. He blinked twice at her, wanting to take off, but uncertain if she was perhaps a bit concussed. It was definitely a possibility, the way she was looking at him.

"You'd make a pretty penny." She said finally. "You give me a call if you get tired of this superhero business. I'll set you up real well."

Superman glanced down at the card. "Sunrise Escort Services" was brightly proclaimed in red letters that clashed against the green, Bree Parker--Owner, in small curlicue letters below.

"I--you--it--" He trailed off, as he looked up and realized the--Bree--had disappeared.

*

It was the sound of a boot thudding against the wall--or rather, of a boot passing through the wall and bouncing onto Lex's plushly carpeted office floor that alerted Lex of Clark's return. Clark followed a microsecond later, staring at the boot hatefully, not picking it up. Lex slid his pen against the sheaf of papers before him alertly. Silence was the best way to get Clark to start talking. The problem after that was just getting him to stop, but Lex had his ways.

"You know." Clark started, stopped. Lex tapped the pen again; Clark's eyes following the motion.

"I try. I mean, I do. I try to help people." Clark said inanely. Lex nodded, not at all sure where this was going.

"And humans? Are kind of weird. They have all these different reactions to me. I'm prepared for almost anything now. It takes a lot to faze me at this point, wouldn't you say, Lex?"

Lex opened his mouth in assent, but Clark rushed on. "But when girls who are barely twenty years old proposition me, in an alley after I've saved them from being mugged, I get a little unnerved. And then I'm unnerved that I'm unnerved, because I'm Superman, and shouldn't I be past that by now?"

Lex was still on the 'proposition' and 'Clark' and the 'both of them in the same sentence' portion of the conversation, even as Clark continued, perplexed.

"It was like she was undressing me with her eyes! I felt-I felt like a cheap piece of meat! And yeah, I get that the costume's a little revealing, but that doesn't mean you should-should be staring at my packaging!"

Lex started, the pen falling from his fingers with a resounding echo in the still office. "Packaging?" He prompted, nearly wheezing, managing to continue looking at Clark directly.

"She was undressing me with her eyes! People don't do that when I'm in the costume! They're too busy being freaked out by whatever I just saved them from, I guess." Clark said thoughtfully.

"I'd assume that to naturally be the case." Lex returned seriously.

There must've been some giveaway in Lex's voice because Clark was suddenly sitting directly across from him on the heavy desk, looking unaccountably cute yet disheveled with his missing boot and twisted up cape.

"Do you think the costume is a bit much?" Clark asked hesitantly. "I know it's bright, and well, gaudy as hell. That's intentional! People aren't supposed to be looking at me!"

"And she wasn't, not really, now was she?" Lex said sensibly. "The costume fulfilled its purpose."

"I guess not. But-Lex. She sent contracts! New 'talent' contracts!" Clark spat, rushing out of the room and returning with a thick packet, tossing it onto Lex's desk. "To Superman's e-mail address!" Clark exhaled.

Lex narrowed his eyes thoughtfully, feeling his cheek twitch as he perused the very through documents, the indecent presentation of a girl who obviously didn't value her life much, propositioning Lex Luthor's boyfriend like this.

*

Lex knocked with restraint, once, twice, leaning on his cane gingerly. Stupid kid leaving his skateboard on the sidewalk. Fortunately, Mercy being Mercy, kept several canes and crowbars in assorted sizes in the trunk. He didn't want to ask, really. The door swung open in a wide arc, revealing a small, strawberry blonde with a toothbrush hanging out of her mouth. She took one look at him and promptly gurgled, the toothbrush falling to the floor. She swallowed the toothpaste.

"I, ah, thought you were someone else."

"Obviously." Lex returned coolly, moving inside, trailing his cane as he asked to speak with Miss Parker.

"Bree? You want Bree? Yeah, um. She's upstairs. I'll go and-yeah." The girl practically fled, taking the stairs by twos.

Lex smiled to himself in satisfaction. It was nice to be respected. Feared, respected. Whichever.

He heard the sounds of footsteps around the side of the staircase, and loud whispering. "Look, it wasn't Lex freaking Luthor, okay? He probably just looks like him."

There was an insistent tone in reply. Lex couldn't make out the words, but he could get the gist. A tall girl strode into his vision range and he smirked at her slight falter atop the staircase. She quickly regained her composure, and Lex felt a minute grudging respect. She approached him confidently, with a small smile on her face.

"Mr. Luthor. I have to say, I never expected to meet with you." She said, brushing her arm across his sleeve as she walked past.

"I wish to discuss a matter with you." Lex said, ignoring her impropriety, in his favorite Fuck With Me and I Can Buy the Block You Live On And Paint it Purple voice. He was awaiting the glint of fear to appear in her eyes, so it was with some chagrin that instead, the girl's smile grew and she gestured gracefully at the sofa. He eased into his seat, sliding the cane to his side.

"I'm sure we can come to some sort of arrangement." She murmured, eyeing his cane for a moment, sliding onto the other side of the sofa.

Lex smiled faintly. "I have a friend," He began.

"I'll bet." Low, dry laugh, but not old enough to have a jaded aftertaste.

"I wouldn't call him exactly a friend, I suppose. Something of a misnomer there. You met him yesterday afternoon. Big guy with the cape?"

"But-aren't you guys like, mortal enemies or something?"

"That's neither here nor there. The thing is, he's an important presence in this city. I don't want him encountering any trouble unnecessarily."

Miss Parker blinked once, slowly. "I-I see."

"He's not exactly used to what happened with you yesterday yet. He's still so new to these issues."

"Oh, wow." Breathless, high-pitched giggle that Lex felt compelled to simply ignore.

"There are proper channels to go through with this sort of thing, and contacting him directly is not one of them. I don't want him to have to deal with anything like this unpleasantness again. I sincerely hope that it won't prove to be necessary for me to pay you another visit?"

"No. Of-of course not, Mr. Luthor."

"I don't want there to be any confusion as to what this is or is not." Lex continued. "I'm a concerned citizen-I don't want to see Superman distracted from his fine work in Metropolis."

Bree shook her head 'no', her hair swishing lightly.

Satisfied, Lex showed himself to the door.

*

Denise came rushing in, startling Lex. Denise never moved at anything less than a sedate pace, unless you counted the time Live Wire had broken into the building and she'd smacked her against the wall in a dizzying array of snap kicks.

"Mr. Luthor!" She pronounced, and to her credit her carefully modulated voice was perfectly in place. There was a slight blush on her cheeks, much to Lex's curiosity. She slid a paper across his desk, and Lex glanced down.

"The relations team isn't certain how you want this handled, sir."

"I can understand their confusion." Lex murmured.

The Daily Planet's headline read in screaming bold: Lex Luthor, CEO by Day, Pimp Daddy By Night? Byline by Lois Lane, naturally. Why couldn't Clark have worked for the goddamn Inquisitor? It'd have simplified things so nicely. The Planet could have been bought and sold years ago, and he wouldn't be in this special moment right now. He read on, increasingly aghast. He didn't realize he looked positively murderous, or that Denise was managing to edge her way out of the room.

LexCorp CEO Lex Luthor, rumored to be considering a run for the upcoming U.S. Senate, now has a new title to add to his lengthy resume: Pimp Daddy Extraordinaire. Bree Parker, 20, proprietor of Metropolis' Sunrise Escort Services discussed her recent experience with Metropolis' infamous citizen.

"He said there wasn't to be any confusion about what this was or wasn't." Ms. Parker stated, still stunned at having Mr. Luthor pay a completely indiscreet visit to her business just yesterday afternoon.

"He said he was there because Superman wasn't the person I should've spoken with about my business proposal, and made it implicitly clear he was the person to speak with."

The article's words blurred slightly after that and Lex scanned it quickly.

There was a loud bang of a door downstairs. Clark's boot came crashing through the wall and a couple hundred pounds of sulking alien flopped onto the couch. Lex sighed and switched on the television.

There was footage replaying several reporters crowded around a harassed looking Superman, who finally threw up his arm to take flight, shouting to the ground, "I AM NOT LEX LUTHOR'S HO!" Lex pushed the mute button when he realized Clark was talking.

"My life sucks." Clark mumbled into the decorative pillow.

Lex un-muted the television and started jotting down notes for his publicist.