Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Find a Way

Amnesia, Apathy and Insanity

by Quillian 4 reviews

Finally, an update...

Category: Harry Potter - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Drama - Characters: Harry - Warnings: [!] - Published: 2006-12-05 - Updated: 2006-12-05 - 3400 words


A/N: ARGH, so sorry it took so long to update this...

WARNING: Some medical details here, some insanity there... just so you know.

Chapter 9: Amnesia, Apathy and Insanity

He was resting on his bed when the doctor came in. She was a tall middle-aged woman with short brown hair, wearing wireframe glasses, and gave an appearance of a professional.

"Good morning," she said with a hopeful smile. "How are you feeling today?"

He shrugged. "It still kind of hurts... well... all over." His eyes hurt a little too, because as best as he could make out the doctor, it was still kind of blurry.

"You must be a brave young man," she commented. "After all you must have gone through..."

He turned to look at her curiously. "What do you mean?"

Now the doctor looked confused. "You don't remember what happened?"

He shook his head in the negative.

"I don't know how to put this lightly... so maybe I should just be bluntly honest with you?"


"Well... it looks as though someone assaulted you," the doctor said uneasily. "There were bruises, wounds as though someone had cut you, stabbed you, or just beat you..."

He began to look alarmed now. "Well... I... geez//..."

She nodded. "I know. I was sort of hoping you could tell me what happened."

He shook his head. "Sorry."

"Well, now that you're awake, we were wondering if you could tell us who your family or relatives were so we could contact them."

"I don't know."

"What do you mean? You can't tell us who your family or relatives are?"

"Yes, that's what I mean."

"Are they the ones who did this to you?" she asked seriously, with an edge in her voice. "Don't worry, lad, because if they did, you can tell us and we'll call the police..."

"No, I mean..." There was a pause, and sounding exasperated, he said, "I don't know who my family or relatives are... if I have any at all."

There was an uneasy pause between the two, until he elaborated, "I don't remember anything." This last part came out in a sort of half-whisper.

The nurse - whose nametag read "J. FRASIER" - looked sympathetic. "I'm sorry." Jotting something down on her clipboard, she added, "I'll have your picture circulated, see if someone recognizes you. In the meantime, you just recover. But let me ask you something else... do you have any idea how old you are?"

He thought for a moment, hoping to remember something about himself. But nothing came to mind. "Sorry, I don't remember anything."

"Well, don't worry about it. We'll help you get back into health."

"Thanks, Doctor...?"

"My name is Doctor Jennifer Frasier... but you can call me 'Jennifer,' if it's easier for you."

"Thanks, Jennifer."

"Also, we'll make sure we help you remember soon enough."


"Well, if there's anything else you need..."

"No, I think I'm fine for now."

"Oh, I almost forgot..." Reaching into her doctor's coat, she pulled out a pair of black glasses which did not exactly look brand new, but had been fixed up. He put them on, and all of a sudden, everything was sharper.

"That's better," he commented. "Thanks."

"You're quite welcome. Anyway, I'll come by again later." And with that, Dr, Frasier left his room.

He leaned back in bed, looking up at the ceiling. However, the nurse's words came back to him, and he wondered... exactly what had happened to him?

After that, a darker thought occurred to him... what if he didn't want to remember who he was? What if his life had been so bad that this amnesia might actually be something of a blessing in surprise?

It seemed that only time could be able to tell.

In the meantime, the Dursley family couldn't have been happier.

The boy was gone for good, and now every day almost seemed like a celebration in itself just because they were now living what they considered to be a freak-free existence. Petunia Dursley in particular considered it to be full circle, from the time when the boy was left on their doorstep with the letter to when the letter came at the beginning of the summer, saying how he was missing. Here they were now, on the first day of August, a day after the boy's birthday, and they were still just as happy as when they got the news.

However, something was about to put a dent in their apathetic happiness.

The doorbell rang, and Petunia went to see who it was.

She nearly screamed loud enough to be heard by everyone else on the street.

"Hello, Petunia," the man on the other side.

It was Albus Dumbledore.

He was dressed in normal clothes, but she was still alarmed by how he was here at all.

"Just came in before anyone sees you!" she hissed. There was no way she wanted to let him in at all, but between how she didn't want anyone else to see him and how he was certainly one to be reckoned with, she decided to bear it.

Smiling all the while, Dumbledore entered. Petunia quickly closed the door behind him. The moment after entering, his clothes somehow turned into wizard's robes.

"What do you want?" she hissed, sounding like intense steam.

"It's been more than a month now since I sent you that letter regarding your nephew. I realize that there may have been other factors in your lives, but it's been quite a while..."

Petunia had to wonder, as she did from time to time, how a man such as Dumbledore could be so seemingly all-knowing and yet so ignorant at the same time.

However, looking into her eyes, Dumbledore began to quickly discern what the truth may have been.

"You didn't care, did you?" he asked quietly.

By this point, Vernon and Dudley had come into the room, and while neither of them recognized Dumbledore, at least Vernon had some idea who this man was, especially judging by the robes he wore.

"Oh, you'd better not be who I think you are..."

"If you mean the headmaster at Harry's school, then yes I am."

Vernon instantly went lobster-red in the face, and shouted, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!?"

"Checking to see why you did not respond to my notice about Harry going missing," Dumbledore said evenly, and Petunia noticed how that twinkle in his eyes was now completely gone.

"Why should I care why that boy went missing?"

"Because 'that boy,' as you call him, is your nephew, to whom you are guardians," Dumbledore said slowly and deliberately.

"Only because you left us with no choice but to raise him!" Petunia screamed.

It wasn't the first time that Petunia screamed at someone with magical powers before, let alone someone at all, but something about what she was saying this time caused all three men alike to turn to her as she began to rant like she did when Hagrid first came along to get Harry years before.

"You think I'm a cruel, heartless woman, Dumbledore? Because I'm not! If I was, then I could have easily left the boy out to die on a street somewhere! You should be lucky I took him in at all! But NO, you knew that I couldn't leave my wretched sister's son out to die! You manipulated me and my family, took advantage of that! You didn't exactly give me a choice, either, because you knew I couldn't reply back to you to refuse taking the boy in! How many other people, freaks or not, will leave children in baskets on people's doorsteps in the middle of the night, huh? I protected your precious little savior until he could defeat that 'Dark Lord' you kept going on about, and that's what counts, isn't it? Now that that's over and done with, I'd like to get back to my life without any of Lily's family or friends interfering in it!"

Breathing heavily, she glared at Dumbledore, half-afraid that he would put some sort of nasty spell on her, half-daring him to do something like that. Both Vernon and Dudley looked at her in amazement, as well as at Dumbledore with something like fear.

To her great surprise, as well as disappointment, Dumbledore didn't look the slightest bit offended. But what she didn't expect in his eyes was something akin to disappointment.

However, it was even worse than that.

She saw pity in his eyes. Pity for her.

That was the worst thing he could have shown for her.

"Regardless of whatever you might think, Petunia, I did not leave Harry with you just to aggravate you or make you miserable," Dumbledore said calmly, feeling as though he had something which he wanted to say for years as well. "I purposely did not leave Harry with a Wizarding family because not only were some of Voldemort's supporters still out there, anxious to take revenge on your then-infant nephew, but because most Wizarding families would have spoiled him, thus making him arrogant. I knew full well how you felt about your sister, and magic in general, but I did take the time to look for other people who could have been fit to raise Harry. Sadly, you were the only one who fit the criteria for a safe guardian. On top of that, the sacrifice which Lily made for her son's life was built on blood magic, making the closest blood relative the best protector. Not only has Harry been protected by his blood relative, that being you, but so have you and your family, protecting you all... a small benefit which I thought you might appreciate."

Closing his eyes for a moment and then opening them again, Dumbledore also added, "I would have known if you or anyone here had been physically abusing Harry, so for years, I was under the impression that maybe you had buried your hostility towards Lily and managed to live peacefully with Harry. However, it seems I was not entirely correct there."

Petunia noticed that he didn't mention Harry living in the closet under the stairs for ten years, which made he wonder about the boundaries of what magic was or wasn't capable of doing, including locating wherever anyone could be at any given time. However, she wisely decided not to bring that point up.

Vernon, on the other hand...

"You should have known, and yet you did it anyway!" Vernon shouted, suddenly becoming brave once again. "Not once did you ever complain about him living in the cupboard!"

Petunia jolted to turn and look at her husband in horror. Vernon, I love you very much, but you can be such a fool sometimes...

Dumbledore's already twinkle-less eyes had now become an icy, arctic cold, one which made the Dursleys shiver just a little. And unless Petunia's mind was deceiving her, a slight tingling feeling was spreading throughout the room.

"Excuse me?" Dumbledore asked in a controlled voice. However, he didn't need to ask further, because one glance into Vernon's eyes to his mind by means of Legilimency told him everything.

Dumbledore was not a man who got angry easily, because he preferred not to get angry. Nor was he one to enjoy revenge against someone who had harmed him or someone close to him, rather mourning the person who would do such a thing. Even still, he knew that sometimes, in order to make people understand just what you could be capable of, you had to flex a little muscle sometimes.

Like how Zeus used to occasionally send thunderbolts to down to Earth from atop Mount Olympus to remind mortals of his power, Dumbledore allowed his powerful magic to permeate throughout the room, letting them get a taste of just what he was capable of...

But just then, Dumbledore felt something in his pocket. Stopping with scaring the Dursleys a little, he pulled out a small crystal, barely the size of a plum. Gripping it, he spoke into it. "Yes?" he answered, his mood completely changed now as though he had never gotten angry in the first place.

"Albus, it's Arthur," said the voice on the other end. "Where are you? There's something you need to know!"

"I'm at the Dursley's residence, Arthur. I believe you know where it is?"

"Of course, I'll be right there."

A minute or so later, there was a /pop/, and Mr. Weasley was standing in the living room. All three Dursleys recoiled back in fright, remembering when he had come to pick up Harry nearly a year before.

"What happened, Arthur?" Dumbledore asked curiously.

"It's Malfoy."

"Lucius or Draco?"

"Lucius Malfoy. Anyway, he was talking to the Minister just a few minutes ago, when... I don't know, suddenly he just went insane! He shot the Dark Mark up towards the Atrium's ceiling, and was about to put the Cruciatus Curse on the Minister before I Stunned him."

As Dumbledore was taking this in, Mr. Weasley then added, "The Dark Mark on his arm was also active. It wasn't just burned black anymore... it was also glowing red."

Dumbledore was just as surprised as well. Severus never mentioned anything about the Dark Mark acting like that before.

"This is indeed strange, Arthur. I'll come with you right away."

With one last sweeping glance of the petrified Dursleys, Dumbledore gave them all one last look to remind them. Very well, let them be scared, even more once they realized that he had been holding back much of his power. But then, however briefly, his eyes settled on Mrs. Dursley. "Remember my last, Petunia," he said before disappearing with Mr. Weasley.

"What was he talking about, Pet?" Vernon asked incredulously. "Petunia...?"

"I... don't know..." she said slowly, remembering those words reverberate in her mind, knowing full well what they meant.


Arthur Weasley was walking through the Atrium at the Ministry of Magic towards the lifts, and coming towards him in the opposite direction were Minister Fudge and Lucius Malfoy, talking to each other.

Mr. Weasley scowled at what he was seeing. There had been no proof to connect Malfoy to the night where Harry disappeared, even still...

However, Malfoy didn't look all that good. He looked somewhat feverish, and beads of perspiration dotted his forehead and face.

"Lucius, are you alright?" Fudge asked, beginning to look alarmed.

"Maybe not..." Malfoy gasped. "I'm sorry, maybe I should go, we can talk more another day..."

"Nonsense, Lucius. Just let me summon a MediWizard..."

"No, please, just let me return home," Malfoy said, beginning to grit his teeth as though he were in pain. Now other people are starting to look

What in the world...? Mr. Weasley wondered, but once he saw Malfoy grip his left forearm in pain, he knew what was going on.

Letting go of his forearm to draw out his wand, Malfoy had a sudden insane light in his eyes as he whipped it out and pointed it up at the ceiling.


The Dark Mark fixed itself against the ceiling overheard, and people gasped and screamed in fright, many of them running whichever way just to get out of there.

Truly insane now, Malfoy rounded on the Minister, who was turning to run the other way as far as he could. "CRU-"

"STUPEFY!" Mr. Weasley yelled, taking down Malfoy before he could curse Fudge.

The silence in the Atrium felt even more deafening, especially when compared to the noise that preceded it.

Several Aurors rushed up, lead by a dark-skinned bald man with a golden hoop through one ear and a young woman with peculiar short, spiky pink hair.

"Auror Shacklebolt, take this man down to one of the holding cells. Put him on watch at all hours. Auror Tonks, please notify Mr. Malfoy's family that he is not feeling well."

"Yes, Minister," said Shacklebolt.

"Of course, Minister," said Tonks.

As they were securing him, one of the sleeves of his robes fell, and everyone who could see his forearm gasped.

The Dark Mark on Malfoy's arm was as black as it could have been, but now it also gave off a slight red glow.

Fudge's mind was working fast, already thinking of ways to save his own reputation, even though it turned out that one of his friends turned out to be a Death Eater all along.

The Minister of Magic then jumped a little when he heard Mr. Weasley clear his throat, about to ask something.

"Thank you, Mr. Weasley. Your deed will not be forgotten," Fudge said in his usual flair.

"Well, thank you, Minister," Mr. Weasley said, "going with the flow" as it were.

As Fudge hurried off to his office to prepare for the inevitable press release, Mr. Weasley took advantage of the situation and went to find Dumbledore.


Dumbledore and Mr. Weasley strode down the dark, foreboding halls of one of the lower levels of the Ministry of Magic. Aurors Tonks and Shacklebolt came up to approach them.

"Kingsley, Nymphadora," he said by way of greeting (although Tonks winced a little at her own first name). "I trust you have Lucius Malfoy waiting for me in his cell?"

The two Aurors looked at each other for a moment, and then Tonks spoke. "Well... he's there physically... but mentally, he might be gone."

"Show me."

"Right this way, Headmaster," Kingsley said, and they followed him.

From a few doors down, they could hear deranged ranting and raving, and for a moment, Dumbledore thought that it couldn't possibly be the great Lucius Malfoy making those sounds.

The cell door opened, and Dumbledore found himself face-to-face with Lucius Malfoy, as far from his usual self as Dumbedore had even seen him.

His pale blond hair was askew, yet some of it flattened against his head from all the sweat. His eyes bulged, and gleamed with an insane light to them. Just to top it all off, he was frothing at the mouth, looking downright vicious. Little wonder that a Muggle straightjacket had been put on him. Moving closer, Dumbledore could also see that he was attached to the wall by a small length of cord, not even letting him go halfway across the room towards the door where the Headmaster stood.

"Terrible," Dumbledore commented, shaking his head.

"You mean because now we can't get any information from him?" Mr. Weasley asked.

"Well... that too," Dumbledore conceded, now that he thought about it. "But I generally do not wish for these terrible things to befall other people, even if they have done some terrible things themselves."

Once again, Mr. Weasley and the others were reminded of how Dumbledore was seemingly never in short supply of patience, compassion, mercy and hope in such a mad world.

"I suppose Minister Fudge wants me to be informed about whatever happens to Mr. Malfoy?" Dumbledore asked.

"As a matter of fact, he does," Kingsley said. "I'd say he even requested that you do it, given your 'experience with dealing with these Dark things,' as he put it."

"Very well." As Malfoy began another round of screaming and fuming, they all left, glad to get out of there.

If only you could see what's happening now, Tom, Dumbledore thought. Even now, when you are completely dead, from beyond the grave you still manage to ruin people's lives...

A/N: Sorry I didn't update this for so long, but I honestly didn't know what to write. But once I sat down and began writing... Still, I wouldn't expect another update for a while.

Note about the scene with Harry and his doctor: The "J. Frasier" thing is a nod to the fan favorite character Dr. Janet Frasier from Stargate//: SG-1 (played by the actress Teryl Rothery). Although in this case, I made the nurse's name "Jennifer" instead of "Janet," made her tall instead of short, have her glasses, and so on...

You'll also note that I did not refer to Harry by name the entire time, because of the whole amnesia thing in the first scene.

Note about the Dursleys: Even if they shouldn't have treated Harry the way they did for more than ten years, they may still have a valid point about how he was left with them, right?

Note about Lucius Malfoy: All will be explained in due time.

Next chapter... Harry goes to the orphanage? -Quillian
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