FicWad

The scooby gang was now all gathered in Giles' apartment. Even Spike was among the group. They were gathered for two reasons. One, Ethan was again in town and playing havoc with their lives. Two, Willow and Tara knew that they had to tell the others about Tara's dream. If she really did become a demon, only their friends would be able to help.
"You say that Ethan just disappeared on you?" Giles asked for the millionth time.
"We were kinda distracted, Giles." Xander shook his head. "I mean, you guys were who knows where. And Willow did her thing but it sounded like she had lost it."
"It felt like I had lost it." Willow smiled sadly. "But I did manage to keep it together."
"And you brought us back, safe and sound." Buffy smiled at her bestest friend. But the smile faded. She could sense that there was something that her friend was not telling her.
Willow caught the look. She smiled. They would have to spring the news and soon. The consequences were getting too high for them to even think about doing things on their own anymore. And she hated to think of Tara in danger. Maybe there was still a way that they could stop her girl from changing. Or, maybe it was already too late. Maybe she had been selfish and made the wrong choice. Maybe she should have come to the gang sooner.
"Willow?" Giles's voice managed to finally penetrate her thoughts. "Willow, are you all right?"
The red head snapped her attention back to the now. Everyone was now staring at her, including Tara. "Sorry. There's something that you guys need to know." She turned to Tara. Tara smiled her shy smile. "There's something that Tara and I need your help with. It feels like a scooby gang thing."
"What is it, Will?" Buffy stood up quickly. She had been sitting on the couch next to Riley. "You know we're here for you no matter what's going on. Ethan can wait. At least, for a little bit, he can."
The witch swallowed hard. She felt guilty for having to share what she had to with the rest. It was supposed to be just between her and Tara. But they were in way over their heads. "Tara has a secret." The blonde's face blushed a deep red as everyone began to stare at her. "She told me. We tried to figure things out for ourselves, but last night, things kinda took a turn for the worse. We need your guys' help."
"So you've said, Will." Xander eyed his best friend. "What's the what here."
"On Tara's twentieth birthday, she is going to turn into the demon side of her." Willow said it so fast that the gang almost did not understand what she had said. "Her birthday is two weeks from tomorrow."
"Oh wow!" Buffy looked at Tara with sympathy. "That's really harsh. I'm sorry."
"Do you know exactly what demon?" Giles asked. "It would help in our researching efforts."
"I-I'm not sure." All this attention, and the reason for the attention was making the blonde very nervous. "My family didn't go into detail. They just said that I would turn into a demon."
"Well, that's not very helpful." Giles stared at Tara for a moment. "You have no idea at all?"
"Well," Willow looked at Tara. "I hate to ask you to relive what you went through, but we need the description. And you told me about it, but it's not the same as seeing it."
Tara nodded. She took a deep breath before she started. "Last night, I had a dream. I dreamed I turned into the demon. I-I did something I would rather not talk about."
"Of course." Giles nodded. "I'm sure that it was painful. But just a physical description would be quite helpful." He smiled, trying gently to encourage the girl to continue.
This time she swallowed before continuing. The nightmare images of her not just killing Willow, but enjoying it, were way too much. "The skin was scaly, and an orangish color. The face was kinda snakelike. There was a cobra's tongue. And I-I had claws. It also seemed that I was t-taller than I was before. The eyes." She shuddered at she remembered the eyes. "They were so red. Such a bright red. I-I..." She trailed off. The images coming back to her were too much.
Willow, had been sitting on the floor in front of her girl, quickly got up. She pulled her into a protective hug. "It's all right, baby. Just remember, it didn't happen. It hasn't happened. It will not happen. If you could get me under control, I can get you through this. We will do this together. Nothing will break us up. We are meant to be."
Tara pushed Willow away. "How can you say that?" Tears were still running down her cheeks. "You didn't see. You don't know what I'm going to be capable of. I killed you. More than that. I mutilated you. I-I couldn't even recognize you. Goddess, how can you stand being with me." Tara bolted out the front door.
"Guys, please research." Willow turned to go after her. "I have to go after her. Please find out for me."
Before anyone could answer her, Willow was out the door. Buffy turned to Giles. He had a look on his face. A look that she knew all too well. "You know what kind of a demon she's going to become, don't you?"
Giles nodded. "I'm afraid so." He slowly made his way to his books. He opened it to reveal a picture of the demon that Tara had just described. "If this is the demon, I'm afraid..." He trailed off. He did not want to say what he had to.
"What is it, G-man?" Xander eyed Giles. "I get the funny feeling this could be one of those times that Willow will have to sacrifice her happiness to save the world kinda deals."
Buffy turned to look at Xander. He smiled sadly at her. Could it be like it had been for her and Angel? Would Willow have to sacrifice the one thing that she loved more than anything in the world? By the looks on Giles' face, the answer was yes.
"This demon is a killer." Giles swallowed. "It is a predator. There is no reasoning. And it is not uncommon for humans to become this demon. But usually it's because of a spell or because it is handed down from generation to generation." He eyed Buffy carefully. "You may very well have to kill Tara."
Willow found Tara sitting in their shared apartment. She half smiled to herself. If Tara had really wanted to get away from her, why had she come to the first place that she knew that Willow would look for her. Because Tara really wanted to be found. And that was a good thing.
Willow did not hesitate for a second. She walked up to Tara and kneeled in front of her. She said the first thing that came to her head. "I almost feel like I'm proposing instead of trying to comfort you."
Tara snapped her head up. A little smile played at the corners of her mouth. But it would not come. There was too much pain. And it was all because of her stupid curse. "You shouldn't have come. You're better off without me."
Willow looked the blonde in the eyes for the longest time. They had been through this with her own control issues just a short time ago. Tara had thought it was also best if they separate back than. "I want you to listen to me. I mean really listen to me. I love you. I love you more than I have ever loved anything before in my life." She took Tara's hands in her own. "I knew my life had changed that day in Michigan. The day that I first met this shy girl. I could tell by just one touch of our hands that we were meant to be. I have to admit, I didn't realize it than. But looking back, that was the moment that I fell in love with you. You are sweet. You are caring. You do things so that everyone else is happy and you forget about your own happiness. You've made me happier than I've ever been. That day, when we met, it was as if I was starting to live for the first time. I had a reason to get up in the morning."
She swallowed hard so that the tears would not start falling. She could tell that they were oh so close to the surface. "When I got your first letter, I felt so special. I felt like it was meant to be. But there was still no way for me to contact you myself. And so I lived in fear. Fear that I would never hear from you again. And there was so much fear. I think I realized that you were now a part of me. I needed you to live like I need oxygen to live. It's as simple as that."
Tara tried to say something, but Willow would not let her. "I'm not going to listen to I could kill you speech. Been there. Done that myself. Remember, I could have easily lost control. And in my dream, you were the first person I killed. Granted, the situation is a little different. But that doesn't mean we can't find a way to work this all out. I will find a way to work this out. I'm not losing you. Ever. Do you hear me? Are you really listening to what I'm saying?"
Tara smiled shyly. Willow stood up. She pulled Tara up from the chair as well. She pulled the blonde into her arms. "This is how every day is going to start and how every day is going to end. You are going to be in my arms. I won't let it be any other way. This is how it is supposed to be."
"But Willow..." Tara felt her girlfriend hold her even tighter. "Willow, we can't just ignore what might happen. There is a real possibility that I could kill you."
"You're not listening." Willow kissed her on the cheek. "It doesn't matter to me. You and me together, that's an always and forever kinda deal. No matter what is happening. We will deal."
Willow pulled her over to their shared bed. She forced Tara to lay down. "You're tired. You need some rest. I'm going to stay right here. I'll be next to you."
"But the dream?" Tara shuddered remembering what she had done and seen. And even the taste.
"That's it." Willow began chanting. It was a spell to help Tara sleep. But what Willow did not realize, it would also protect her while she was sleeping.
Again, Tara found herself in her old dorm room. The one that had so many pleasant memories. And again, she was standing in front of that tiny mirror. Familiar arms wrapped themselves around her. She swallowed hard. This had been when she had turned the last time. She had become that monster and killed her everything. She felt her body tensing. Usually when Willow held her, she relaxed.
The red head must have sensed something was wrong. "Tara, baby? Are you all right?"
Tara closed her eyes. She prayed to whatever goddess would listen. Please do not let her turn into a demon. Please do not let her kill her everything. Going through that once was more than enough for one lifetime.
"Tara?" Again, there was the sweetest voice she had ever known. The one that loved her so much that she would stand by her even though she was some kind of hideous monster. She so did not deserve the girl's love. "Baby?"
She felt Willow try to move to stand in front of her. "Don't." It was a simple word. "I don't want you to see."
She heard Willow gasp. But she also heard Willow laughing. That sweet laugh that she loved so much. How could her everything be laughing at a time like this? When she was looking the way she was and changing the way she was. "Tara. Sweetie. Open your eyes. You won't believe what you see. You were beautiful before, but my goddess, just look at you now." The giggles from Willow continued.
Still facing the mirror, Tara slowly opened her eyes. Instead of a scaly orange demon with hideous red eyes looking back at her, there was this almost elf like creature staring back at her. Her blonde hair had turned the color of the yellow sun. Her skin was as pale as the moon above. Her blue eyes were now an even deeper shade of blue. Her nose had grown a little with a little crook. Even her ears had grown into little points. But she was not hideous. Instead, she was beautiful. And, for the first time in her life, she felt really beautiful. Of course, Willow being by her side was what truly made her beautiful.
"Willow?" She looked confused. "Is it really me?"
She woke with a start. She found Willow staring at her. "What did you dream about? You asked me if it was really you?"
"I wasn't hideous." Tara smiled, little tears of joy were in the corners of her eyes. "I was beautiful."
"I could have told you that." Willow kissed her gently. "I've always known that you are beautiful."
Tara's eyes suddenly got really sad. "Which dream is real? What is going to really happen to me?"