Categories > Games > Kingdom Hearts

Santa Cloud

by MushyKHendricks 1 review

A holiday in Hollow Bastion! Merlin's house is full of festivity, and Scrooge McDuck has a change of heart and shows up with presents. Somehow, Cloud gets talked into dressing up. Again.

Category: Kingdom Hearts - Rating: PG - Genres: Humor - Characters: Merlin, Other - Warnings: [!] - Published: 2006-12-25 - Updated: 2006-12-25 - 3352 words

0Unrated
Author's Note: I actually wrote this back in July, when it wasn't even Christmas, but I thought it wouldn't hurt to post it on ficwad - it's merely a coincidence that it happens to be Christmas Day. Gah. I also realized during a rant that a lot of people would like to see more Disney characters in Kingdom Hearts fic, and while this doesn't quite deliver, it doesn't forget Disney. Constructive Criticism is welcome.

Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts, or the Santa Suit.

-

"So you want us to come to Hollow Bastion for the holidays?" Sora said with a grin, letting his excitement for Christmas get the best of him. From Leon's point of view, the monitor had stretched out some of Sora, Donald, and Goofy's proportions while shrinking others. It was like looking in a fish glass.

The person on the other side of the monitor grunted, staring at his toothpick until he got annoyed with it and pulled out a cigarette. He grinned, pleased with himself, and relaxed a bit in his chair.

Over by the bookshelves, Yuffie let out an exaggerated cough and Cid made a sour face. Leon was leaning up against the wall of Merlin's house, behind Cid, but he could still see Cid's face from the reflection of some of the turned off monitors. He pretended not to be slightly amused. Back in Traverse Town, Cid refused to smoke in his shop so he didn't offend customers, but as soon as he was outside, he'd tear into his pack of cigarettes. Now that his shop was closed, and he was just part of the Restoration Committee, he continued to smoke. Merlin didn't appreciate it, so Cid always waited until the wizard was out of the house.

"I'm not taking it outside. You expect me to work next to a computer all damn day and not have a fucking cigarette?" Cid muttered. He turned back to the monitor, where an anxious looking threesome was pressing in close and closer to the monitor. "Anyway, I don't really care what you decide to do...it wasn't my idea in the first place. They just made me the damn messenger."

"Come on, Unca Donald!" Suddenly three exuberant ducks began merrily trying to look into the monitor, surrounding a disgruntled Cid.

"Your uncle gets it," Cid said, shooing them away. They slowly stopped leaping up and down with pleased looks on their faces, as if they had already convinced their "unca" to come to Hollow Bastion, and turned around to head to the door leaving Merlin's place.

"We cleaned the shop up! So you can stay there if you want!" One of them called back to the monitor, before the three of them exited Merlin's house. Leon shook his head with a small, almost hardly noticeable smirk, and rested his head against the wall to look up at the ceiling.

Cid turned back to the monitor and Leon listened to the rest of the conversation without so much as daring a glance. The fish glass effect was annoying him just a little bit.

"Cid are you allowed to smoke in Merlin's house?" Sora asked Cid sternly.

"Oh shit, kid, not you too!" Cid cursed. "Anyway, are you going to visit for Christmas or what?"

"Sure, Cid! I mean, I didn't think we could take too many breaks, but it is Christmas," Sora said thoughtfully. "Only for a couple of days though."

"Sounds good to me, kid," Cid leaned over, ready to flip a switch, stating, "I have work to do now, so if you'll excuse me..."

With that, he clicked the monitor off before the either of the three on the other side could reply.

"Damn it, why didn't one of the girls make the offer? What the hell do I care about some fancy holiday?"

"Whatever," Leon muttered, straightening up. "I'll be back later. I'll do a sweep of the town while I'm out, but first I need to buy more bullets."

"All right Leon," Cid said. "While you're at, would you pick me up some cigarettes? I'm low as hell, and I'm going to be at this all night." He gestured at the monitor, which showed activity of Heartless in certain areas, shields, and self defense mechanisms they had set up around Hollow Bastion. "I'm having problems with some of the equipment we set up, and so I'm going to be holed up in this place for a while."

Leon smirked. "Merlin's going to have a fit when he realizes you've been smoking in here again..."

"Is anyone really supposed to believe I quit, and chew on toothpicks all day?" Cid grumbled. "Don't get those cheap ones either. They taste bland."

Leon waved his hand a little, dismissing Cid's complaints. "Yeah, yeah. I know what kind you like Cid."

-

"I actually got to meet Sandy Claws! Er, Santa Claus!" Sora rubbed his neck and grinned sheepishly. "I guess Jack kind of rubbed off on me..."

Since Donald, Goofy, and Sora had arrived in Hollow Bastion, they had been entertaining the Restoration Committee with stories from their adventures all Christmas Eve. It wasn't just entertainment - anything they said could be vital information. For now, though, Sora wanted to talk about his adventures only surrounding Christmas, so Leon didn't have any questions or any reason to do more than sit over by the computer with Cid and listen. He might have gone into hiding, but he knew better than to try. Cloud, however, must have forgotten during his constant ventures world to world, just how hopeless trying to hide was.

Cloud had tried to occupy himself with a job sweeping through the town to monitor the Heartless actifivity, or running any errand someone would offer him. Aerith had threatened to get them all dressed up for Christmas, and Leon even knew she was serious. When she had come back with parcels from a trip with Yuffie, Leon had shifted in his seat uncomfortably and exchanged nervous looks with Cid. Cloud's idea was to find a quiet corner of Merlin's house and not say anything, but between Aerith, Yuffie, and Sora, there wasn't any opportunity to hide.

Aerith had already sold Donald and Goofy on headbands with reindeer antlers, and Sora was wearing a tilted felt Santa hat. It hadn't fit well over his thick brown spikes. Leon wasn't sure which person would next fall victim to Aerith's Christmas spirit. She had already dressed herself up with a santa hat and had replaced her usual armlets with rings of bells. So now every time she moved, Merlin's house would fill with the sound of Christmas jingles. It made Leon twitch a little in irritation after a while. Cid had confided in Leon that as soon as she removed them, he would steal them and dispose of them quickly.

The luckiest one of them all had to be Merlin. He was so busy waving his wand around, moving decorations into the right places around his home that Aerith had left him alone. Leon had a feeling Merlin didn't mind the cheer, but he wasn't willing to change out his blue cap to add to the growing number of green and red felt.

There was one amusing factor in dressing up for Christmas. Leon had snorted when Yuffie had managed to get Huey, Dewey, and Louie dressed up in elf hats and matching jackets, and she too was adorned in a green set herself. Only, unlike the ducks, she even had the elf shoes. She kept winking at everyone mischievously, making Leon a little suspicious. She seemed to be the only one holding a conversation with Sora about talking to the real Santa Claus.

"You know, it's a shame we don't have a Santa Claus here in Hollow Bastion," Aerith spoke up while she slowly made her way over to Leon and Cid. Both the men went on high alert and stiffened, but she continued looking at Sora.

"That would be great!" Goofy chimed in.

"I wonder if we could get anyone to play the role?" This innocent remark came from Aerith, who had crept her way behind Leon. He wasn't surprised when she plopped a Santa hat on his head. Immediately he brushed it off and it flew to the floor.

"Oh, you're not very fun, are you Leon?" Aerith said, smacking Leon in the arm with the hat after she had retrieved it off the ground. When she dared edge towards Cid, he glared her down. "Neither are you, Cid. Quit being grumpy men and loosen up. After all, we have guests!"

Was it mentioned that Cloud had no hope of escape? It was almost like watching a cheetah zoom in on its prey and take off. Cheetahs were agile and speedy, and Cloud was the poor antelope caught in the jaws before he knew what had hit him. Aerith had already balanced a Santa hat on his spikey head and was looking seriously at him.

"Cloud, you have to be Santa Claus," Aerith said, as if the matter was settled. And when Aerith was serious and declared something like that, there was no backing out. Watching Cloud sit there with a dumb expression on his face, not sure how to react, nearly made Leon feel sorry for him...but not quite. After all, Cloud thought he could worm his way out of the holiday, and hide. It was no fair that he should be the only one spared from this ridiculousness.

Leon didn't miss the giant smirk spreading across Yuffie's face. So they had planned to nail Cloud with this burden all along - those sneaky women! Even more amusing was the look of complete awe, with dropped jaws and wide eyes and even the "what?" slipping off their tongues that Donald, Goofy, and Sora had synchronized. Cid was laughing so hard, but trying not to be noticed, that he had turned to his computer screens, his shoulders shaking while he tried to contain the chuckling.

"Well, you're the only one," Aerith said in a firm tone. "There was no way we were going to get anyone else into a Santa suit, not with their attitudes. You've had fun in the past with dressing up, so I thought that maybe you could be Santa for us, too."

It really shouldn't have been all that surprising that Cid could no longer contain his laughter and slid off his chair, clutching his stomach. Not after that remark, anyway. Most of the people in the house had no idea what Aerith was talking about or what had made Cid crack. Even Leon couldn't contain a smirk, as he knew what Aerith was referring to, but there were many faces staring puzzled at either Aerith or Cid.

"Well, you see," Yuffie began, placing a hand on Sora's shoulder and giving him a wink, "Cloud here is not a stranger to, erm...cosplay."

"Cosplay," Sora repeated, staring ahead at Cloud. The poor boy was still confused and stunned. Cloud as Santa?

"Well..." Yuffie drew out the word nice and long, her face growing more mischievous by the moment. Watching her made Leon embarrassed for Cloud.

"Yuffie, I don't think they need to hear about that," Cloud interrupted. "And I'm not wearing a Santa Suit."

"Oh, but I think you are." Now Yuffie's face was lit up so impishly it made Leon's hair stand up on edge. "You see, I have pictures."

"Pictures," Cloud repeated, looking lethally at Yuffie, who nodded, each bob of her head very enthusiastic.

"We don't have to resort to blackmail," Aerith said calmly. "He's not hard to convince or anything, Yuffie."

"Oh, we do," Yuffie said. "I mean, wouldn't Sora like to know about Cloud's cosplaying adventures?"

"It wasn't cosplay," Cloud said, his face turning pink.

"Be our Santa this Christmas, Cloud. Please?" With the face on Yuffie, Leon was convinced she was a demon. It was absolutely wicked of her.

"I knew he was never going to live that down, but did he fucking listen to me?" Cid muttered to Leon, to where the others couldn't hear him. "No, he's got to carry it with him. At least we still have our pride as men."

Cloud fell to the bait, of course. There were blackmail pictures after all, even though Cloud should have known Yuffie had slipped out of the house while Aerith was pulling out his costume. Leon just knew Yuffie must be digging around her own place to find those pictures, and regardless of how much red and white Cloud was going to have to wear, their guests would witness his little "cosplay."

"Wow, Cloud, you're going to make an awesome Santa!" Sora said when Aerith handed Cloud his suit.

If only looks could kill, had Cloud been wearing the look he was giving Sora, back when Leon and him were fighting Sora in the Cup tournaments at Olympus Stadium. They might have actually won against the Keyblade and the kid behind it.

This Christmas would actually have presents. Of course, they were nothing special, since munny was a bit tight for the Committee, so they all managed to fit into the sack Aerith had bought. Yuffie and the nephews had spent the entire time before Sora, Donald, and Goofy had arrived, wrapping presents. Apparently that was the reason they had all chosen to wear elf costumes?

Merlin had finished decorating the house, just in time to relax for the rest of Christmas Eve. Cid and Merlin were prone to bickering once in a while, but there was one thing they could agree on - the drinks were horrible. Originally Aerith was going to fix the drinks for the party, but too many people insisted Yuffie ought to make the drinks, but when it was realized she was as willing to spike punch as anyone, the job had fallen to Leon. Aerith and Yuffie had made the eggnog - or rather, they made sure neither added anything they shouldn't have.

So when Merlin and Cid took to passing a hidden flask back and forth while no one but Leon was looking, it wasn't a surprise. Aerith had insisted that the party go on without alcohol, but Leon thought it was much better for those two. They weren't fighting - which meant no magic from Merlin's wand zapping into one of the computers when he meant to hit Cid. To top it off, Cid was able to ignore the awful Christmas music the nephews had put in, and didn't do as much griping.

Leon was hearing it loud and clear, and it was giving him a headache.

Somewhere during the party, Yuffie had managed to slip back into the house without anyone noticing. It couldn't be helped - Leon kept an eye on her as he sat over by the computer, glancing occasionally to the computer screen to see if everyone in Hollow Bastion was enjoying a quiet, Heartless-free Christmas Eve. He was probably the only one sober enough to handle any problems that arrived. For those not drunk on alcohol, they were drunk on Christmas, or dressed in ridiculous outfits.

Between that and watching Yuffie, Leon kept himself fairly occupied. As Leon suspected, Yuffie had pulled Sora, Donald, and Goofy to the side while Cloud was distracted by the nephews to slip photos out of the back pocket of her shorts. Leon gave Cid's chair a kick, and when Cid glared up to chew him out, Leon pointed to Yuffie.

"Cloud should get out of that suit," Leon told him. "She didn't keep up her end of the bargain. If he wore it, no one would see the pictures."

Watching Sora, Donald and Goofy's expressions switch from curiosity to shock, and then smiles breaking on their faces and watching them laugh at Cloud was priceless. Cloud had finally pulled from a conversation with Huey, Dewie, and Louie to look up at the source of the laughter, only to find everyone's eyes on him. It didn't take him long to spot the pictures in Yuffie's hand.

If he were in Cloud's place, Leon would have been furious, but the only furious part about Cloud was his blush. Even Cid was howling, and Merlin and the nephews had rushed over to Yuffie to see the source of the laughter.

"Purple's not quite your color, Cloud," Sora teased Cloud, holding up a picture of Cloud in a purple dress, wearing a wig with blond braids, while standing up on a stage.

"It was a play," Cloud muttered, and Aerith gave him a light hug.

"Cloud, no matter what they say, only a real man would have pride enough to crossdress," Aerith told him in a deceptively kind tone, while glaring sternly toward Cid and Leon. "You really saved that play. It couldn't have happened without you."

"Aww, Cloud, you look cute! How old were you when this happened?" Sora flipped the picture back over to take another look at it.

"Nineteen..." Cloud muttered.

"Well...you did help out by playing the role, right?" Sora said optimistically, but even Leon could tell Sora was still amused.

"Let's have Cloud pass out presents!" Aerith suddenly said, and she retrieved the large bag of presents from a desk and brought it over to Cloud.

Now that the tint in Cloud's face matched the red on the suit, Leon felt really bad for the guy. So bad, in fact, that he hoped that after passing out presents, Cloud would change back into his normal clothes and they could escape out of the house to do a sweep of the town. Cloud could breathe the fresh air and get away from being put on the spotlight.

Leon could get away from the stupid Christmas music, because if he didn't watch himself, he was going to get it stuck in his head.

-

Nearly everyone had crashed at Merlin's place, until the morning. Leon was one of the earliest people to wake up, along with Cloud. Cid had fallen asleep at the computer, but that didn't stop Leon and Cloud from checking the monitors for Heartless activity. Luckily, it didn't seem any different than normal, and all the security measures were working.

Sora, Donald, and Goofy had managed to pass out on Merlin's bed, and Merlin had fallen asleep in a chair. Everyone else was either on the floor or in a chair, except for the nephews who had actually gone home, accompanied by Leon and Cloud when they were out doing a check on the town last night. Supposedly, Sora, Donald, and Goofy were staying in the nephew's shop, but Sora and Goofy had already fallen asleep and Donald had decided on staying with his traveling companions.

Slowly everyone was pulling out of their sleep. Aerith and Merlin eventually woke, and when there was just enough light outside, the nephews came in. Huey, Dewey, and Louie didn't give Sora, Goofy, or Unca Donald any more time to sleep after that. Aerith, Yuffie, and the nephews managed to make a decent brunch by the time everyone was awake, and Merlin had arranged a table with plenty of seats so they could all enjoy a Christmas feast.

As they were sitting down to enjoy their feast, however, the door of the house burst open. Everyone turned to look at the newly arrived guest.

"Unca Scrooge!" Donald said, as the old duck came in, carrying an oversized bag of presents over his shoulder. The bag was so big, and the duck so short, that it dragged along the stone floor.

"Do you mind if I join you?" Scrooge asked, setting the presents down by the door.

"There's plenty to eat," Aerith told him, finding another chair to pull up to the table.

"So what do we owe this honor?" Cid asked Scrooge, going to the presents and poking through them. "You never spend any munny if you can help it. Everyone knows you're the most goddamn stingy..."

Aerith glared at him, and he trailed off.

"Well," Scrooge began as he sat down at the table, "I realized something last night during a strange dream I had..."
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