Categories > Games > Dynasty Warriors

Dynasty Warriors at EBgames mall

by SilentNinja 2 reviews

The dynasty warriors go to the mall to line up for Dynasty Warriors 5's US release at EBgames. Here's what the characters think of the hype. One Shot

Category: Dynasty Warriors - Rating: G - Genres: Humor, Parody - Characters: Cao Cao, Cao Pi, Diao Chan, Gan Ning, Guan Yu, Lu Bu, Lu Meng, Ma Chao, Sima Yi, Sun Shang Xiang, Zhao Yun, Zhen Ji, Other - Warnings: [!] - Published: 2005-08-30 - Updated: 2005-08-30 - 2083 words - Complete

Disclaimer: I don't own Dynasty Warriors/Tactics/3 Kingdoms...

Dynasty Warriors at Ebgames mall


At 9 o' clock a.m. at the mall...

"Hey, Zhao Yun, you're waiting for the game to come out today?" Ma Chao asked.

"Yeah, well maybe, Ebgames said they'll have it today," Zhao Yun said.

"I can't wait to play Dynasty Warriors 5! We finally get our own story consist of the main story based on the life of the Three Kingdoms," Ma Chao said.

"It's unforgivable of Koei if they didn't give me a story at Hu Lao Gate with Lord Gongsun Zan," Zhao Yun said.

"Yeah, I hear ya brother. My dad was suppose to be in it too. Hell why didn't koei create my Dad's forces, since it's Dong Zhuo, Lu Bu, Meng Huo and Zhang Jiao again," Ma Chao complained.

Suddenly, another person appears, it's Sun Shang Xiang.

"Hey guys, the store still hasn't open yet," Sun Shang Xiang said.

"Lady Sun," Chao and Yun said at the same time.

"All my fans are babbling about my new DW5 outfit," Shang Xiang said.

"I think my new outfit is better than DW4, but not as badass as my original DW3 costume," Zhao Yun said.

"Ugh, I still look abit lame in my new one, DW4 one is worst," Ma Chao said.

"Hey, it still gives your fans enough options which version of you to cosplay at the Anime Expo," Sun Shang Xiang said.

Zhen Ji appears...

"Hi...." Zhen Ji said.

"Ji, what's wrong?" Zhao Yun said.

"It's...nothing, forget it. You don't want to know!" Zhen Ji said with widen eyes.

"Oh...." Zhao Yun said. He thinks he gets it.

"I'm in the game! I'm finally in the game! Thank you all idiots for voting the man who forced the pathetic emperor to step down so I can usurp the mandate that my father is too chicken to do it," Cao Pi said proudly.

"......." All stare at Cao Pi.

"Koei made him look more badass than all the other Wei officers," Sun Shang Xiang said.

"Yeah, like will give him huge fanbase..." Ma Chao said sarcastically.

"Huh...what's wrong with me making to the game?" Cao Pi questioned.

Zhen Ji slowly raise her hands up and then slaps Cao Pi in the back of the head.

"Ooww, you wrench!" Cao Pi said.

"Watch it! Or I'll have Zhao Yun take your head so I can finally become a widow without poisoning myself," Zhen Ji said.

The other three laugh at the amusement.

"Yeah, so I make it to the game and no one is surprised..." Cao Pi sighed.

Gan Ning appears

"Phew, that was close. Hey, isn't Lu Xun suppose to be here?" Gan Ning asked.

"I haven't seen him. Is he having trouble with fangirl traffic?" Sun Shang Xiang questioned.

"Gulp!" Gan Ning said.

"Our Kingdom really is the most popular," Sun Shang Xiang said.

"Man, can't a guy get any peace from those crazy fangirls?" Gan Ning said.

Zhuge Liang, Yue Ying, and Jiang Wei show up at the mall...

"I see, the store clerk hasn't arrive on time yet," Zhuge Liang said.

"Maybe, they're still trying to get those preorders calculated since yesterday, my husband." Yue Ying said.

Jiang Wei on the other hand, is carry a lot of stuff that his Prime Minister and his wife brought at the mall.

"Need a hand?" Ma Chao asked.

"Nono, I got it," Jiang Wei replied.

Sima Yi appears and stares at Cao Pi...

"......." Sima Yi just keep staring at Cao Pi.

"What? Why is everyone looking at me like that!" Cao Pi

"Why didn't Koei just add my collegue Deng Ai in the game!" Sima Yi cried.

Zhuge Liang felt sorry for his eternal rival and pats him in the back.

"Perhaps the next game he'll make it, I'm sure my vassal here wants Deng Ai in the game too," Zhuge Liang said.

Jiang Wei nodded sadly.

Lu Xun finally arrives with a little breath left...

"Phew....Gan Ning, why didn't you just help me out there?" Lu Xun said.

"I..I have my share of fangirl problems too! If we both have them collide, there's no way we'll ever get out of there separately," Gan Ning said.

Guan Yu appears with his son Guan Ping.

"Lord Zhao Yun and Ma Chao," Guan Yu bowed.

"You guys made it. But, the store still hasn't open yet," Zhao Yun said.

"The fool! Where could he be at this hour? It's already 11 pm now!" Sima Yi said.

"Could be preorders?" Zhuge Liang said.

"Or traffic jam," Lu Xun said.

Lu Bu and Diao Chan show up...

"LOL, why should I have 3 Masou stages? That's a repetitive there! Cao Cao and that bum Liu Bei gets 8 masou stages! Why should I, the mightiest warrior of the game have less than 3 masou stages when those two get 8?" Lu Bu shouted.

Zhao Yun and Ma Chao coughed up with signs of "Bull!" showing at the title MIGHEST WARRIOR OF THE GAME.

"Because most of what you accomplished are based in Hu Lao Gate, Chasing Dong Zhuo, and getting executed at Xi Pia," Zhuge Liang said.

"Duh, that is disappointing! The reviews on seem to put the score agreeable with me," Lu Bu said.

"Well, we all have our own opinions what we like about the new DW game. Like my new costume!" Shang Xiang said.

"My own story masou mode!" Ma Chao said.

"Me being in the game!" Cao Pi said. Everyone stares at Cao Pi with dissatisfaction.

"I want the game to see how the music is," Diao Chan said.

"As good as 3 or so so DW 4 style?" Zhen Ji asked.

"I'm hoping 3," Diao Chan said.

Xiahou Dun and Cao Ren appear...

"Uncles!" Cao Pi greeted. But, Dun and Cao Ren ignore Cao Pi's presence and face the poster of Dynasty Warriors 5 on the store window. "Oooh, why isn't no one giving me any credit?"

"I hope my final level weapon is the hardest," Xiahou Dun said.

"Mine too," Cao Ren said.

"So everyone is hyped up with the new Dynasty Warriors game," Zhao Yun smiled.

"Ahem..." Lu Bu gumbled.

"Riiight, not everyone is stuck with the hype," Zhao Yun said..

Zhou Yu and Sun Ce appear with Qiao Sisters...

" many more Wu characters are going to make it in the first day," Sima Yi sighed.

"It's not a big deal, since both of us continue to have the greatest rivalry in 3 kingdoms history," Zhuge Liang smiled.

Zhou Yu didn't like what he's hearing. He's tired of the game being more about Zhuge Liang and Sima Yi than him.

"Excuse me, but I'm also one of the greatest minds here!" Zhou Yu said.

"Hey, calm down, Yu. You still got Chi Bi as the greatest battle of three kingdoms history," Sun Ce said.

"But, that doesn't mean anything. We're lucky from that time, still I can't believe the forces of Shu and Wei continue to recover so quick and get stronger and stronger during my time!" Zhou Yu said.

"Hey, next time, the two of you should be listening to your doctors in order to survive," Guan Ping said.

"Oh yeah, unlike you and your father when both of you are dead at the same time!" Zhou Yu said.

"Well, I'm glad Mi Fang didn't make it in the game. He's still a default regular model," Guan Yu laughed.

"But, still, we kicked your butts," Mysterious person said.

It's Lu Meng...

"Hmph, tell your incompetent Lord of yours that he's a hypocrite and forgotten his father and brother's reason of the Kingdom," Guan Yu said.

"Huh, Zhou Yu, is that true that my brother ignored my wishes to defending our lands from invaders?" Sun Ce said.

"Uh...well..." Zhou Yu said.

"He lied to me also, brother," Sun Shang Xiang said.

"Quan!" Sun Ce argued.

"Forgive me, Ce! I had beef with Zhuge Liang and had no intention to lie to Shang Xiang and execute Guan Yu!" Zhou Yu said.

"Damn it, if only Xu Gong's losers didn't ambush me at the forest, I will still lead the Wu kingdom in good and heroic terms!" Sun Ce said.

"Hey, at least, I killed the man who ambushed your father," Gan Ning smiled.

Ling Tong appears...

"You killed my father!" Ling Tong said.

"Oh my god, you again...How many times I said, to forgive me. I was under orders with that jerk Huang Zu!" Gan Ning sighed.

"Hey, Ling Tong make it to the game!" Lu Xun said.

"Lu Bu, where's your daughter?" Ma Chao asked.

"Qi couldn't make it here due to training, don't ask me, she's born to be a warrior," Lu Bu replied.

Cao Cao appears

"Well, the sheeps are here," Cao Cao said.

"Cao Cao!" Lu Bu and Ma Chao said.

"Cousin!" Xiahou Dun and Cao Ren said.

"Father! Guess what, I made it to the game!" Cao Pi said.

"Meh...I want Koei to give me edit bodyguards and officers mode back!" Cao Cao said. " The more officers and bodyguards, the more my ambition justified!"

"Thank the heavens, Koei took them out of the new DW. No longer Cao Cao won't break the tradition," Zhuge Liang said.

"What are you talking about, edit mode is fun!" Sun Shang Xiang said.

"I'm afraid I agree with the Wu princess, Prime Minister," Jiang Wei said.

"Without Edit mode, what will become of the replay value and fanfiction?" Sima Yi questioned.

"Hey, there's always an xbox version on the works. It'll have it, besides the Xbox got a harddrive and more dvd space and development power," Zhao Yun said.

"Or DW5 Xtreme Legends, coming soon," Lu Xun said.

Finally the store manager of Ebgames appear..

"Sorry for the long wait. That line must be for Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory I assume?" Ebgames manager said.

He opened the door leading to the video game store. Everyone enters to get their copy from pre orders.

"Actually, we all are here to get our copy of Dynasty Warriors 5 on PlayStation 2," Zhao Yun said with Zhen Ji standing next to holding his arm without Cao Pi noticing.

"Oh, hmm." The store manger checks his computer. "Yeah, it's suppose to be out right now, but I'm sorry I forgot to tell you all this..."

"Huh, you mean, the shipments haven't arrived on time before the game release?" Sima Yi said.

The Store Manager nodded sadly. As today, the game is delay till tomorrow or Thursday. These people suppose to have the game today.

"Argh! Why didn't they ship them earlier before the beginning of the week?" Sima Yi said.

"Perhaps another time, Yi. We can still wait while there are other games I also planned to buy that will keep me waiting for Dynasty Warriors 5," Zhuge Liang said.

"Husband, we haven't brought Tekken 5 this month, so lets get that till the copies of DW5 arrive tomorrow?" Yue Ying smiled.

"I think I'll get Splinter Cell 3," Jiang Wei said. The three sure know there are too many good games out this month besides Dynasty Warriors 5.

"This sucks, I hate delays..." Gan Ning said.

"Me too, hey Gan Ning, how about joining me around the mall?" Sun Shang Xiang said.

"Me too, I don't want to get caught by those crazy fans," Lu Xun said.

The three Wu characters leave the store.

"Hmm, I wonder if there's any competition at the arcades," Zhao Yun said.

"Oh nooo, you're not thinking what I'm thinking are you?" Ma Chao assumed.

Zhao Yun put a sly grin at Ma Chao. The Fierce Dragon is still undisputed greatest fighting game competitor at the arcades. The two left to settle their rivalry while Zhen Ji secretly follows to play DDR.

"What? Zhao Yun going to the arcades, not when I'm still around as the mightiest warrior in the arcades!" Lu Bu said. He and Diao Chan went to the arcades too.

"What a waste of time. I'm going back to Barnes and Nobles," Cao Cao said.

Xiahou Dun, Cao Ren, Guan Yu and Guan Ping decide to go to footlocker shoes store. Sun Ce, Zhou Yu, and the Qiao sisters went to the movies. Sima Yi went to Suncoast videostore to buy anime. That leaves...

"I'm in the game! Soon my own fan base will establish and become the best new character," Cao Pi said.

"Geez, some ego you got there pal..." Ling Tong said. He left to go get something to eat at the food court.
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