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Disclaimer- I don't own Naruto.
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Sasuke growled in frustration. `Che. Stupid dobe.'

Flashback
"Sasuke-teme!!" A loud voice yelled from behind.

Sasuke turned around, watching Naruto run towards him.

"What do you want, dobe?" Sasuke asked, slightly annoyed.

"Are you going to the festival?" Naruto asked.

"No." Sasuke coldly replied.

"Awww...come on, it'll be fun!!" Naruto whined.

"I said `no'."

"It's not that bad aside from the fan girls who chase you and want to rape you..." Naruto trailed off.

Sasuke glared at him.

"Stop being such a teme and come!!" Naruto continued unaware of the murderous glare sent to him.

Sasuke stalked off.

Naruto's shoulders sagged, but then an idea came to his head.
"Heh heh! Sasuke!! If you don't come then I'm gonna tell the whole town your secret! Believe it!!!" Naruto shouted.

Sasuke stopped in midstep, he turned to face Naruto. There was a flicker of worry through Sasuke's eyes. A normal person couldn't have seen it, but Naruto did.

A sinister grin grew on Naruto's face. Out of nowhere Naruto pulled out photographs of Sasuke stuffing his face with cake.
Naruto chuckles. "Who would have thought, the great Uchiha has a sweet tooth?"

Sasuke paled, but kept his composure. "I don't know what you're talking about, dobe." There was no emotion in his voice but inside he was in turmoil.

Naruto knowing Sasuke for so long, knew that Sasuke was worried or freaking out. Either way, he was going to make Sasuke-teme go to the festival.

"So you don't care if I make posters and stick them all over Konoha?" Naruto asked slyly. "Or I sell the pictures to some of your fan girls?"

Sasuke shot Naruto a glare that would have made Orochimaru drop dead, but once again Naruto was unaware of it.
Happily listing off the things he was going to do, Naruto did not notice that every three seconds passing, Sasuke was inching closer.

There were always consequences when waving around photos, and for Naruto they were snatched out of his hands.

"N-nani!!" Naruto shouted in alarm.

He looked around frantically, saw a pile of ash on the ground and Sasuke walking off again.

Desperate to stop him, Naruto came up with a last minute plan B.
"Kage bunshin no jutsu." Naruto whispered.

There was a `poof' and a replica of Naruto, miraculously the bunshin had a camera.
"Get ready." Naruto told the bunshin.

It nodded and disappeared from sight. Naruto grinned, he was going to use sexy no jutsu on Sasuke and when the bunshin takes the picture...heh heh. Then Sasuke would surely go to the festival.
Naruto charged towards Sasuke at the last minute he did a forward flip and landed in front of Sasuke. Of course, Naruto being clumsy as always, he tripped and fell face forward straight onto Sasukes' chest making him fall backwards.

The pair were unceremoniously sprawled on the ground. Seconds later there was the unmistakeable sound of the camera go `click'.
It took seconds for Sasuke to register what happened.

"WHAT THE FUCKING HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!!" Sasuke yelled. (He yelled because screaming was for girls...at least he thought it was...author sweat drops)

Naruto tried to get up, in the attempt he unconsciously brushed his hand against Sasukes' crotch. Sasuke stiffened in shock, then he felt the little dude down there harden a notch. (A/N: had to write that! It was too hard to resist! Lolz "the little dude"! rolling on the floor laughing)

Naruto got up, leaving a shocked Sasuke on the ground.
Not watching where he was stepping, Naruto lost his balance on a small rock. Again Naruto fell on top of Sasuke. Looking down, Naruto noticed how close his face was to Sasuke's. He had the sudden urge to kiss those manly looking lips. A blush spread across his cheeks. (A/N: author shakes head bad bad Naruto, dirty dirty mind... author sweat drops maybe that's me... more sweat drops)

`WHAT THE HELL?!' was all that ran through Sasuke's head. He could feel Naruto's breath against his cheeks. `He's so close...his breath smells like ramen, I wonder if it tastes like it too...'
A small blush appeared on Sasuke's cheeks.

"Do you mind getting off me?" Sasuke asked, his voice a bit too high pitched.

Sasuke cursed himself for losing control of his voice.
Naruto smirked when he spotted the blush. After all these years of Sasuke tormenting him, it was time for some revenge.
Naruto leaned forward to Sasuke's ear. "What if I don't want to?" Naruto replied huskily.

Sasuke could feel Naruto's breath against his ear. Shivers of excitement ran down his spine. `Hold it right there, excitement? What the hell? This...this, this is dobe I'm thinking about. WHAT THE HELL?!'

"Get off! Usuratonkachi!" Sasuke growled.

"Then say you will go to the festival." Naruto whispered.

Sasuke was about to retort when he felt Naruto nibble his earlobe. What Naruto was doing made him feel...feel something indescribable. He bit back a moan.

Sasuke whimpered when Naruto stopped. Next thing he knew, he was looking in Naruto's eyes. In those blue eyes he saw mischief mixed with some emotion which made Sasuke's throat dry.

"Say you will go to the festival."

"Fine." Sasuke managed to say after sometime.

Naruto smirked and leaned closer. Their bodies were touching.
Naruto was about to go further, when an annoying voice cut through the air.

"Sasuke-KUUNN??!" The suffix ended in confusion.

Both boys turned their heads to see a horrified Sakura standing there.
Naruto scrambled off Sasuke. Having Naruto's warmth leave him, Sasuke silently pouted.

Sakura snapped out of her horrific state and screamed.
"Naarutooo!!!"
End Flashback
(A/N: would have written more but the flashback was too long.)


Now here Sasuke was, in front of Ichiraku Ramen place, waiting for a certain someone to show up.
Sasuke was fed up with waiting. His patience was used up and he was tired of all the stares he attracted from both male and female idiots. With a huff, Sasuke walked off. He was about to turn the corner when something soft bumped into him, his nose caught the familiar scent of ramen.

Sasuke looked down to see Naruto on the ground rubbing his head.
"Usuratonkachi."

Naruto looked up to see a scowling Sasuke. His face broke into his trademark grin.
"Sasuke-teme!"

"You're late." Sasuke growled out.

Naruto pouted. "Haven't you heard of being fashionably late?"
Sasuke resisted the urge to pounce on Naruto and smother him with his mouth.

`Stupid hormones. But you got to admit his childish behaviour makes him look cute...hang on...WHAT THE HELL AM I THINKING?!! I'm NOT GAY!!!'

Sasuke was dealing with his inner conflict when he noticed Naruto's face magnified significantly.
Sasuke blinked and snapped out of his thoughts, `those lips...'

"What are you looking at, dobe?"

Naruto's face breaks into a grin.
"RAAMMEENN!!!" Naruto screamed in Sasuke's ears.

Too stunned to react, Sasuke allowed Naruto to drag him off to where he was waiting earlier.

`Stupid dobe, always killing the romance with his...wait, what am I thinking? I can't like that dobe. Do I?'
(Tsk tsk, Sasuke in denial. Poor you)

Naruto rushed into Ichiraku with Sasuke in tow.
"Three bowls of ramen, oyaji!" Naruto greeted the old man.
"Coming up!" The old man grinned at Naruto and got to work.

30 Minutes Later (nothing interesting happened... Naruto and Sasuke sweat dropped "Maybe you were too lazy!!" they yelled. author sweat drops "Shut up!")

"Could we get this festival thing over and done with already?" Sasuke growled.

Naruto looked up, his mouth full of ramen. "Wha?"
An irritated Sasuke shot a glare towards Naruto. Naruto slurped the ramen hanging from his mouth.

Naruto cocked his head to one side and blinked with round eyes.
`He looks so damn cute...snap out of it Sasuke! But he is so cute...'
"The festival." Sasuke said flat out, while his inner Sasuke was in dreamland.

Naruto crossed his arms and nodded wisely, then waved his chopsticks about exclaiming. "We're going to stay here."
Sasuke scowled and got up, "Then I'm going home."

"Uh ah." Naruto wagged his finger. "I got more photos, you think I've only got one copy?"

Naruto grinned wickedly. "Now sit down and eat your ramen."
Sasuke sat. `Kuso. Baka Naruto. If those pictures get out my reputation is ruined.'

Naruto pushed the bowl towards Sasuke, he had the `I know something you don't' smile on.
Sasuke's senses were on full alert, he cautiously took a bite of the ramen with Naruto watching him like a hawk.

After several mouthfuls and sips, Sasuke placed his chopsticks down.
"Hn. Done. I'm going."

Naruto having finished his 13th bowl of ramen stopped and looked at him.

"Awww...don't be such a party pooper." Naruto whined.
He grabbed Sasuke's hand.

Sasuke started to feel all funny. Naruto's hand made him feel hot. It was like the time Naruto was on top of him (see flashback), but this time it was more intense.
Naruto got up from his seat.

"Thanks for the ramen, Oyaji!" Naruto dug into his pocket, pulled out a few bills and slapped it on the counter.

Sasuke was paralysed from the connection of Naruto's hand. He felt the urge to pounce and...um...well...do something naughty. (A/N: just to say. Naruto slipped something in Sasuke's ramen. That's why he's acting like this.)

"Let's go for a walk!" Naruto announced. He dragged Sasuke out of Ichiraku.

Sasuke collected himself. Naruto had released his hand when they turned the corner. He silently pouted at the warmth leaving.
`It was kinda nice having his hand in mine...so warm... Hold on! What's going on? Sasuke get a hold on yourself!'

For the second time Naruto's face magnified in Sasuke's view. A blush crept to his cheeks.

Naruto could see the pink on Sasuke's face. He grinned. `Everything is going as planned. The drug is taking effect. Heh heh heh...'

Sasuke knew Naruto had something planned, but he couldn't think straight. He noticed how close Naruto was, his body urged him to get closer. There was a feeling building inside. He needed to get rid of it.
Sasuke pushed Naruto against the wall and leaned in.
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Sakura was excited about the parade in the festival. She had convinced Hinata, Kakashi and Iruka to help her out.
She was disappointed that she couldn't find Sasuke-kun to help her out.

Now all four of them headed to their destination. Sakura turned the corner and recognise the familiar back of her beloved Sasuke-kun. She ran up to him. "Sasuke-ku...n?"

What she saw made her jaw drop. Hinata got worried and walked up behind her. She put a hand on Sakura's shoulder.

"S-sakura-san?" Hinata questioned softly.

Hinata was confused when Sakura didn't respond.
Sakura was just staring blankly in front of her. Hinata followed her gaze. She grew red in the face, now she resembles a red tomato.

"N-Na-Naruto-k..." Before Hinata could finish, she fainted.
"Hinata!" Iruka exclaimed.
The dolphin ran to catch her before she fell. Iruka gently placed her on the ground.

"Hinata! Daijoubu ka? Wake up! Don't die!" Iruka was in panic.
Kakashi placed a hand on his shoulder. "She just fainted from shock."

"From what?!"
"See for yourself." Kakashi gestured towards the scene in front of Sakura.

Iruka was lost for words, his mouth was agape. He stared at Naruto and Sasuke. It took a while to register what they were doing. Iruka blushed as red as Hinata.

Kakashi chuckled. "This would be good material for `Icha Icha Paradise: Guys Action'." (A/N: Kakashi is not gay!! It was Jiraiya! If you like I would post something to explain how he got the idea for such a book.)
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Naruto and Sasuke were so caught up in what they were doing that they didn't notice the small audience.

They broke apart panting. Chuckling was heard behind Sasuke, both boys turned to see a shell-shocked Sakura, a fainted Hinata, beet-red Iruka and an amused Kakashi.

Naruto peered over Sasuke's shoulder, he saw them all and gave a grin. "Hey Sakura-chan, Kaka-sensei, Iruka-sensei!!! Ano...what happened to Hinata-chan?!!"

Hinata stirred and sat up, she caught sight of Naruto. She remembered what she saw and turned tomato-red once again.
Naruto saw Hinata awake. "Hey Hinata-chan!" Then he tilted his head in confusion. "Why is your face so red? Are you alright?"
Just when you thought Hinata couldn't get as red as she is now, but she made a nice new shade. Hinata let out a small stuttering, timid "yes".

"Great!! I'll see you later! Bye Sakura-chan, Hinata-chan, Kaka-sensei, Iruka-sensei!!" With that, Naruto grabbed Sasuke's hand and ran off giving them a wave goodbye.
Both were sitting on the roof of Naruto's apartment waiting for the fireworks to begin.

Sasuke was fidgeting. The weird feeling from before increased. He felt unusually hot even though there was a cool breeze.
Every time he glanced at Naruto, there was an urge, an urge of raw hunger. This urge scared and excited him at the same time.
Knowing the Sasuke was staring, Naruto ignored him and gazed at the stars.

Finally, Naruto spoke. "Naa...Sasuke" he drawled "Enjoying the view?"

Sasuke blushed slightly.
"Hn." He managed.
Naruto smirked. "You don't sound very enthusiastic" he crept closer to Sasuke. "I'll just have to fix that."

Sasuke's breath hitched at the implication in Naruto's words. Did Naruto mean what Sasuke thought he meant? Sasuke noticed that Naruto's face was magnified yet again.

Naruto slowly leaned closer to Sasuke. Closer, closer and...
"Wanna play ping-pong?!" Naruto exclaimed, holding a ping-pong bat which he had apparently pulled from nowhere. Sasuke stared at it. `Ping-pong?!' His mind shrieked. `Stupid dobe, always killing the romance. That's twice now! Wait...what's wrong with me? First I kiss Naruto, now I'm thinking about romance? It's like I've got a crush or something...'

Sasuke's mind shut up, trying to process it's most recent thought. He failed to notice Naruto waving the ping-pong bat in front of his face.

"Sasuke! Sasuke! Earth to Sasuke! Are you there?!"
The motion of the ping-pong bat became more frenzied as Naruto continued to try to grab Sasuke's attention.

"Sasuke, you're freaking me out here! Saasukee!" Naruto finally whined, giving up and dropping the bat.
The clattering managed to finally pull Sasuke back to reality.
He stared at Naruto, who was pouting cutely.

Sasuke, having just accepted the revelation that he found Naruto attractive, blushed slightly. Naruto smirked as he noticed the slight tinge of pink on Sasuke's otherwise pale cheeks.
"Naa, Sasuke, you're turning red." He remarked.

Unnoticed, on a nearby rooftop, Jiraiya set up camp and pulled out a pair of binoculars.
Once again, Naruto leaned closer to Sasuke. "Why are you turning red?" He teased.

Sasuke had had enough. "Dammit, Naruto!" He yelled, trying to will the unnatural colour from his cheeks. "What do you want from me?!"

Naruto stopped for a moment, and then smirked. "This." He said.
Before Sasuke could react, his lips were once again locked with Naruto's.

Jiraiya silently congratulated himself for following Kakashi's mysterious hint to observe Naruto and Sasuke. A lecherous grin appeared on his face. This was going to be good!

Sasuke was lost in Naruto's kisses. He moaned at the feel of Naruto's hands on his skin. His body was on fire, burning with desire.

Sasuke was vaguely aware that his clothes were gone, discarded along with Naruto's. Then there was nothing in his world except the pain and far greater pleasure of having Naruto inside him, and later the excessive euphoria of orgasm.

Meanwhile, Jiraiya pressed his binoculars to his eyes so hard that they stuck there and he no longer needed to hold them up. A very slight trickle of blood dripped unnoticed out of his left nostril as an extremely lecherous grin completely overtook his face.

Sasuke snuggled up to Naruto and gazed at the stars. Contemplating the fiery pinpoints of light peacefully, he reflected that revenge wasn't everything after all.
Pressing closer to Naruto, he chuckled quietly. `At least I have something he doesn't...'

Meanwhile
Itachi woke briefly with a sudden sneeze. Wondering if he was coming down with something, he decided not to worry about it and went back to sleep with his arm around Kisame.

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A/N: This fic took months!!! Even though it took this long, my friend (Queenphoenix) finished it for me. But I claim all the ideas!

I'm wondering whether to write a one-shot to explain how Jiraiya came up with the idea for "Icha Icha Paradise: Guy's Action".
I hope you enjoyed it! Review please.