FicWad

When I was younger, my mother and older sister died in a car crash, and my father has blamed me for it because I was the only one that survived. Sometimes I find myself wishing that I hadn't, because my life was just that horrible. The kids at school made fun of me, my teachers hated me, and every day when I got home from school my father would be drunk, and come at me with empty glass bottles and fists.

I have no friends at school, and I only join up for as many sports as I can in order to stay away from my father longer. And also in hopes that if I got home late their would be a greater chance that he had passed out already. But then the times that he wasn't passed out he would have more anger to take out on me, if that was even possible.

I dress in long sleeve shirts and pants at school and around the house, not because I am cold, but because I have to hide the scars, cuts and burses that are on my arms, and to make the beatings take less damage on my skin. I have tried to go to the councilors office to tell them what happens, but they say that I am telling lies and that I only want more attention. When I go to them, I only succeed in making more hatred towards myself...so I do not try to tell them anymore.

I was sitting under my tree outside at lunchtime when Sean Foster and his small group of "friends" were walking by. I tried to make myself as small as I could in order to avoid them seeing me. These were the main people that pick on me; they did because they were older than I was. They also knew that they could get away with it. As I thought they would, they saw me, and I swear all of their faces lit up like some lucky kid on Christmas.

Sean pulled me up by my long hair. He must have been angry when I didn't make a sound of pain, but I was used to taking damage in fights like this. Ones where I wasn't the one that was doing the fighting. He pushed me into the circle that his friends and gathering people had made. I guess that everyone was going to watch as I was beaten up. I even saw some teachers walking over to watch. I say watch, not help; because they are like everyone else...they do not care.

x~X~x~X~x

After school, I took the long way home. I always do this, but this time, I am not going home. I have a black eye, causing the people to give me odd glances when they think I'm not looking. I don't care; let them stare at me like I am some freak show. I'm just like my father, the councilors, and everyone else at school,...I don't care...

I don't know how long I will walk for, but like I said, I don't care...I don't care as long as I get away from this place. This...hell. I know that I can take care of myself, because I haven't had someone to hold me when I was hurting for a long time.

Tears claim my face as I watch as the world passes in a blur. Rubbing my face, I try to dry my eyes. I will not cry for these people, these people who know nothing about hope, faith, or love. Even I will admit I know nothing of love. I just have the memories of my mother from when I was five. Before I crumbled into the pieces that are now supposedly my life.

Nobody will look for that girl who ran away. No, they will not look. Because they are like everyone else in this cruel, harsh world. They don't care about little ten-year-old girls who cling to their broken teddy bears at night, because the world is so big and bad to them. No, they won't look, because...they just don't care...