FicWad

It was happy in the beginning; everyone met me with open arms. Gerard was laughing at my jokes, Frank adding on. Bob smirking. Ray, well Ray was with Emma. I didn't meet her in the beginning; I didn't even meet Ray. Both of them were elsewhere.

Just one look into your eyes

Two weeks into the tour, I meet her. Ray came after introducing her. She smiled this small warm smile, it touched me. Ray didn't notice. She said "hello" to me everyday as though it were the last. Ray didn't notice. Emma would force my speech into tumbling battles over my lips. Ray didn't notice. He never noticed; Why? He himself was wrapped up in her.

One look and I'm crying

I did, I wept for her. She would often catch me in mid sob. I'd try to blow it off but she knew. She knew, I wept for her. I would throw myself into a tantrum throwing up violently; she held my hair, and rubbed my back. She helped me, I wept for her.

'Cause you're so beautiful

My first mistake. Kissing her one late night. I had gone for a walk. We met up; she had bought Ray some Advil from a nearby store. I touched her collar bone. My first mistake. I leaned into her lips and made them touch mine. My first mistake. She slapped my pale face and ran. I watched her go. My first mistake. To let her go.

Just one kiss and I'm alive

I tried to apologize but I couldn't get her to stay. I would call out to her. She hid behind Ray, he never knew. I would call out to her. Emma kept her distance and never stayed without someone by her side. I would call out to her. And she would run away.

One kiss and I'm ready to die

She found me one night, she had gone looking. My head on the edge of the toilet, my stomach contents in the bowl. She had gone looking. I smiled as she stood over me, I raised my bleeding wrist in attempt to wave. She had gone looking. Emma dropped to my side clutching onto them; trying to stop the bleeding with pressure. She found me one night, she had gone looking.

'Cause you're so beautiful

I told her this a few moments before darkness took me. She cried out my name. I answered her back with incoherent moans. She cried out my name.

Just one touch and I'm on fire

I love her. I dreamt about her, her soft hair, her pursing lips, her glowing skin, her gentle touch, they way she called out my name. I love her. I woke to her standing at my bedside. She gazed at me, her eyes stained from tears. I love her. And she loves another man.

One touch and I'm crying

She said goodbye. Touching my face, letting her fingers run down to my chest. She said goodbye. I touched her hand as it pulled away. She said goodbye. I began to sob; choking myself into an unconscious state. She said goodbye.

'Cause you're so beautiful

She is the one woman I feel weak at the knees; sick to the stomach and would toss and turn each and every night. She sits with Ray as I step on stage, her eyes downcast. He doesn't know. She is the one woman.

Just one smile and I'm wild

I'm out of hospital, out of my mind, out of control. I'm not singing the same old song. I step to the mic saying hello to her, she doesn't look up. I'm not singing the same old song. My band begins to play the new cords I have scrambled to write. She looks up in interest. I'm not singing the same old song.

One smile and I'm ready to die

I sing the beginning slow and building to something. She lets a small smile spread her lips, she knows what I mean. I sing. Emma sits straighter moving away from Ray slightly. I sing.

'Cause you're so beautiful

I'm still singing strong. Her beautiful smile has grown wider. I want her. She grips onto the seat in front of her. I want her. I sing those words to her. I want her. And I can't have her.

Oh and you're so beautiful

She smiles.

My darling

Emma lets a tear fall from her eye, she still smiles.

Oh you're so beautiful

I am crying.

You're so beautiful

She still smiles.

Oh my baby

I reach my hand to her.

You're so beautiful

She leans away from Ray, she's smiling.

And you're so beautiful

She's crying softly with me.

Oh my darling

I weep.

Oh my baby

I still hold my hand to her.

And you're so beautiful

I finish. The crowd goes nuts. I've finished. The crowd is raving.
I hold my arms to her. She is standing. I'm holding my arms to her. She begins to run. I stretch my arms, she runs into them. We hug for an eternity. I look to her and she looks to me, we lean in almost touching her lips. And I wake up at that moment...alone, with out her, I've never had here and I never will.