Categories > Books > Harry Potter > One true fact
There is one true fact in this world, and that is that Harry James Potter had to pee. He didn't care where, all he knew was that he HAD to go! And if he didn't go soon he would either explode, or wet himself where he sat in Transfiguration. That would not be pretty. So he bounced his leg up and down, he wiggled in his seat, he twisted one way then the other - anything to keep from going right then and there.
Hermione shot him a look that clearly told him to stop making so much commotion. He rolled his eyes, but quickly looked forward because rolling his eyes seemed to make the need to pee stronger.
Finally, McGonagall let the class out, and Harry shot out of the door. He ran to the nearest bathroom, but found it locked. Damn Peeves! Why did the ghost have to lock THIS door? This was not good. He ran down the hall to the main stairs; he had to go up two flights of stairs to get to the next bathroom. He almost missed one because they began to move. He leapt forward, just making the last step, and took the rest three at a time. He sprinted down the hall, took a left, then a right. It was the last door on his left. He was almost there when he saw Luna and Neville rush in.
Okay, eww! He was SO not going in there. No matter how bad he had to pee. The dorms had a bathroom! He was close too!
Harry ran to the tower blurting out the password, not even letting the fat lady open all the way before he threw open the portrait. Yelling a quick sorry to the protesting woman, he bounded up the steps.
"Harry, mate, you might not want to go up there. Dean was practicing a potion in the bathroom, and, well... just don't go up there," Ron grumbled, clearly not happy about being kicked out of his own dorm.
Harry just about pulled his hair out. That is he would have if he weren't so busy dancing in a circle trying not to pee.
"But I have to PEE!" Harry yelled. Everyone in the common room turned to look at him. Everyone that is except Neville. He was in the bathroom snogging Luna. And Dean, who was in the hospital wing, Harry guessed. He blushed, and ran out of the room. There had to be a bathroom somewhere!
Harry had made his way back to the main hall. He was in such a hurry he didn't see the person in front of him. Therefore, he ended up crashing into said person, and falling on his arse. He scrunched up his face, trying to hold it in for a second, before slowly getting up. All the while chanting 'I will not pee! I will not pee!' in his head the whole time.
"Well, well, Potter. What a rather unpleasant surprise," drawled the voice of Draco Malfoy.
"Sorry, Malfoy. Not now." He side-stepped, and ran down the hall, throwing a goodbye over his shoulder.
Draco just stood there, shocked.
Harry ran down two more halls before he found another bathroom. He ran in, praying that there wouldn't be anything in this one to keep him from going. The door closed behind him, and he stood there in shock. There at the mirror stood Pansy in nothing but her underwear. She shrieked, and threw her brush at Harry's head.
"GET OUT, YOU PERV!"
"Sorry! I didn't mean to!" Harry blushed, and ran from the room. As the door closed behind him he noticed the sign that said "Temporary Ladies Locker Room".
He hit himself in the head, and winced when it just made him need to pee again.
Once again, he sprinted down a few halls. He stopped at another supposed MALE bathroom door. He looked around for any sign as to whether that's what it really was. Not seeing anything, he rushed in. He looked around and found it empty. 'YES!'
Harry rushed to one of the toilets, unzipped his pants, and stood there... Suddenly, he no longer had to pee. He let out a long string of profanities, followed shortly by a loud yell full of angst. Zipping up his pants once again, he left the bathroom.
Back out in the hall, he stopped dead in his tracks. He looked up, and found a small crowd of people looking back at him.
"Harry? Are you okay?" asked Seamus.
Harry sighed, "I don't have to pee." And with that, he walked off down the hall to his next class.
Hermione shot him a look that clearly told him to stop making so much commotion. He rolled his eyes, but quickly looked forward because rolling his eyes seemed to make the need to pee stronger.
Finally, McGonagall let the class out, and Harry shot out of the door. He ran to the nearest bathroom, but found it locked. Damn Peeves! Why did the ghost have to lock THIS door? This was not good. He ran down the hall to the main stairs; he had to go up two flights of stairs to get to the next bathroom. He almost missed one because they began to move. He leapt forward, just making the last step, and took the rest three at a time. He sprinted down the hall, took a left, then a right. It was the last door on his left. He was almost there when he saw Luna and Neville rush in.
Okay, eww! He was SO not going in there. No matter how bad he had to pee. The dorms had a bathroom! He was close too!
Harry ran to the tower blurting out the password, not even letting the fat lady open all the way before he threw open the portrait. Yelling a quick sorry to the protesting woman, he bounded up the steps.
"Harry, mate, you might not want to go up there. Dean was practicing a potion in the bathroom, and, well... just don't go up there," Ron grumbled, clearly not happy about being kicked out of his own dorm.
Harry just about pulled his hair out. That is he would have if he weren't so busy dancing in a circle trying not to pee.
"But I have to PEE!" Harry yelled. Everyone in the common room turned to look at him. Everyone that is except Neville. He was in the bathroom snogging Luna. And Dean, who was in the hospital wing, Harry guessed. He blushed, and ran out of the room. There had to be a bathroom somewhere!
Harry had made his way back to the main hall. He was in such a hurry he didn't see the person in front of him. Therefore, he ended up crashing into said person, and falling on his arse. He scrunched up his face, trying to hold it in for a second, before slowly getting up. All the while chanting 'I will not pee! I will not pee!' in his head the whole time.
"Well, well, Potter. What a rather unpleasant surprise," drawled the voice of Draco Malfoy.
"Sorry, Malfoy. Not now." He side-stepped, and ran down the hall, throwing a goodbye over his shoulder.
Draco just stood there, shocked.
Harry ran down two more halls before he found another bathroom. He ran in, praying that there wouldn't be anything in this one to keep him from going. The door closed behind him, and he stood there in shock. There at the mirror stood Pansy in nothing but her underwear. She shrieked, and threw her brush at Harry's head.
"GET OUT, YOU PERV!"
"Sorry! I didn't mean to!" Harry blushed, and ran from the room. As the door closed behind him he noticed the sign that said "Temporary Ladies Locker Room".
He hit himself in the head, and winced when it just made him need to pee again.
Once again, he sprinted down a few halls. He stopped at another supposed MALE bathroom door. He looked around for any sign as to whether that's what it really was. Not seeing anything, he rushed in. He looked around and found it empty. 'YES!'
Harry rushed to one of the toilets, unzipped his pants, and stood there... Suddenly, he no longer had to pee. He let out a long string of profanities, followed shortly by a loud yell full of angst. Zipping up his pants once again, he left the bathroom.
Back out in the hall, he stopped dead in his tracks. He looked up, and found a small crowd of people looking back at him.
"Harry? Are you okay?" asked Seamus.
Harry sighed, "I don't have to pee." And with that, he walked off down the hall to his next class.
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