Categories > Anime/Manga > Full Metal Alchemist > Apotheosis
A Deep Problem
2 reviewsRoy Mustang discovers that destroying the huge transmutation circle in the buried city beneath Central will be much more difficult than anticipated, with drastic consequences.
2Exciting
Reviews
Apotheosis
(#) Electric_Sapphire 2007-01-01
Well, this looks like the beginning of a good story. The style you use for exposition of the background is unique, if not singular- I've never read another story that used the same technique to open a story, although it's quite possible there is one. I'll continue to read as you post more chapters. A hint, if I may: Writing your title in all capital letters makes it a little more noticeable, yes, but it also makes it look more juvenile. Coupled with a rather underdone and uninteresting summary, such tactics might make some readers pass your story by. I'd change the title to 'Apotheosis', for professionalism's sake. Otherwise, good going, and keep it up!Author's response
Yes, I think both of you are right. I had put it that way initially, just to see how it would look, and then decided today to put it back into lower case. The problem with no longer being able to get online from work is that it sits there, glaring, for many more hours than it should have. :-) Thanks for the review!Apotheosis
(#) Roaming_Fool 2007-01-02
Good start, I like the changes you've implemented. I agree with the other reviewer, though. Why is the title in caps? I promise, I'll have a more through review for your next chapter.Author's response
Thanks, doll! See my response to the first reviewer, about changing the title. I agree with you both on that.
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