Categories > Anime/Manga > Kyou Kara Maou

From the Marriage Bed

by bikun 5 reviews

Set shortly after Wolfram starts "sleeping over." Yuuri wakes to congratulations. It's like crack, mm-hmm.

Category: Kyou Kara Maou - Rating: PG - Genres: Humor - Characters: Conrad, Gunter, Gwendal, Wolfram, Yuuri - Published: 2005-11-19 - Updated: 2005-11-19 - 1234 words - Complete

From the Marriage Bed
by Mina Lightstar

Upon awakening, Yuuri's first thought is, There are so many people in my room. It's a drowsy thought -- half-formed, even -- but it quickly gives way to a second.

The second thought is, Why are there so many people in my room?

He sits up, sleepiness falling away from him with the blankets, and rubs at his eyes with the back of one hand. "What's going on?" he manages, hoping his unease isn't noticeable but knowing it actually is. He is expecting an Incident: a robbery in town, a famine in the next county over, a stack of papers requiring his signature... he isn't sure which would be worse.

When a minute goes by and no one has answered him, Yuuri begins to worry. He scans their faces, tries to guess what could possibly be wrong. Gwendal is no help to that end; his face is, as usual, fixed in a serious expression. Günter looks almost how he does whenever the advisor has been worried, only to have his fears assuaged. That is, Günter is wiping tears of joy and (possibly?) relief, sniffling and muttering nonsense. Yuuri can make out the words "heika" and "so happy" every now and then. Konrad is wearing a gentle smile, which doesn't waver even when Cheri-sama, standing next to him, suddenly squeals and launches herself toward Yuuri's bed.

"Hei--ka!" she exalts, throwing her arms around his neck and squeezing him tight.

Yuuri tries not to focus on the cleavage he is being forced into. It is difficult. "Ch-Cheri-sama," he chokes out, "I can't breathe!" He wants her to let go. She is being very loud and Yuuri's face is in her cleavage and Wolfram is so close and oh-so-very jealous.

As if on cue, Wolfram's angry "Mother!" is shouted over Cheri-sama's excited squealing. The sheets are a disaster after Wolfram yanks them off to sit up on his knees, nightgown slipping off one shoulder.

Cheri-sama releases him, albeit reluctantly, and steps back. She folds her arms and regards the two of them fondly. Her eyes are still sparkling; she is very happy about something.

A second glance around the room makes Yuuri think everybody is happy about something. The same "something."

"What's going on?" he asks again.

"We wanted to congratulate you," Konrad says before Cheri-sama can speak.

"Congratulate me?" Yuuri blinks. It is true that he has gotten a good night's sleep, but--

"Both of you."

"...Both of us?" Yuuri glances at Wolfram, who notably doesn't acknowledge him. "Why?"

At this, the room is suddenly very quiet. Puzzled, Yuuri looks from Konrad to Wolfram. The former looks mildly amused, the latter mildly upset.

"What's going on here?" Yuuri demands. Now he is nervous, and wants an answer.

Gwendal, Günter, and Konrad can't seem to decide who should give that answer. At first it seems Gwendal will reply, but Cheri-sama appears to be the bravest of them all.

"On the heir!" she proclaims. "Congratulations on the heir!"

Yuuri isn't sure what to make of this. He cocks his head, knowing his expression is blank. "What heir?"

That eerie silence settles in again, but this time it does not last long.

"What heir?!" Günter parrots, one hand tangling into his hair, the other clutching his heart. "Heika, what... what... how...?" Even Gwendal's eyebrow arches.

"What heir?" Yuuri repeats, a little more firmly. Why do they shower him with some pieces of information and withhold others?

It is Konrad who takes the conversation further, addressing Wolfram. "You didn't explain it to him?"

Yuuri whips his head around, demanding "What? Explain what?!" but he is ignored.

"Well," Wolfram begins, twin spots of color appearing on his cheeks, "he said -- he," he points emphatically to Yuuri, as though everything is his fault, "he wanted -- and he said maybe... why do I have to tell you, anyway?!" Wolfram folds his arms and looks away from Konrad, turning his nose up.

"Well, someone has to tell me what heir we're talking about!" Yuuri shouts, losing his patience. He balls his hands into fists and presses them into the mattress. "Tell me what's going on!"

It is surprisingly easy to get an answer this time. "My son is pregnant!" Cheri-sama announces with pride.

It is difficult to describe what Yuuri feels. His world narrows, includes nothing but the mattress he sits on and the word "pregnant," which resounds in his head over and over again. Then the nausea comes, panic on its heels, and then along comes shock, and disbelief... and then he explodes.


Günter begins to shy away, almost retreating behind Gwendal. "Are you not pleased, Heika?"

There are so many answers to that, so Yuuri latches onto the few he can handle. "How -- how is that even possible?!" he demands in a shrill voice. "Wolfram's a boy!"

"So what?" the blond spits back at him, glaring at Yuuri over his shoulder from where he sits with his back turned to them all.

"So -- so -- boys don't get pregnant!" Yuuri points out what should be obvious to everyone yet for some reason isn't. "How did it happen?!"

"Well," Cheri-sama cuts in, "you see--"

"What do you mean, how did it happen?" Wolfram shouts, twisting back around to face him. "You did it, you idiot!"

"Me?!" Yuuri chortles. "How did -- I mean, I couldn't have -- I mean, what are you talking about?! We didn't even -- I don't even -- we didn't do anything!"

Wolfram's eyes darken. "We did so!"

"Well, I don't remember anything like that," Yuuri says, or tries to say; before he's gotten to the end of the sentence, Wolfram's hands are at his collar and Yuuri is being shaken.

"You don't REMEMBER?!" The blond sounds angrier than Yuuri has ever heard him. To his dismay, no one is making any move to save him. "YOU! DON'T! REMEMBER?!"

He knows he is probably just digging a deeper grave, but he has no answers and no explanations and no memory of making this supposed pregnancy happen. So he blurts out, panicking, "I was asleep the entire time!"

He can almost hear the room's collective sigh of disappointment. It was the wrong thing to say. Yuuri knows this even before he sees Wolfram pull one arm back, curl his fingers -- white with anger -- into a fist, and....


Yuuri's first thought upon awakening is, Ow, my head. It's a pained thought -- half-formed, even -- but it quickly gives way to a second.

The second thought is, My lower back hurts, too.

Yuuri opens his eyes and finds himself on the floor. His room is dark but for the moonlight, and chilly from the night air. He sits up, and is suddenly aware that it had all been a dream. There are simply no words to describe his relief.

A glance back up at the bed explains the pain in his back: Wolfram has, quite, literally, kicked him out.

Yuuri is irritated, but somehow grateful, for it was undoubtedly Wolfram's kick that had woken him from the dream -- nightmare? -- he'd been having.

So Yuuri stands up, straightens his pajamas, and then shoves his bed-hogging friend over, making room for himself. Then he climbs in under the covers and burrows into the pillow.

Before he falls asleep he thinks, Wolfram needs to sleep in his own room. He really, really does.

...He hogs the bed, anyway.

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