Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Senses Fail
I could clearly hear every word the doctor was saying. I had become used to it; I had accepted the fact that I was just asleep and would wake up when I needed to. Sleep was good for me. It was good for everyone.
I also decided they had no idea what they were talking about.
The doctors were telling my parents that my brain had gone without oxygen for too long, and that if I ever did wake up I would have significant brain damage. That was completely wrong. My brain was fine; nothing was wrong with me. I had almost healed myself, if they kindly would have stayed out of it.
However, their words still brought a wisp of fear to me. If there was something wrong with me, I definitely wanted them to fix it. But it wasn't my brain. My mind was perfectly fine and intact. So was my heart, still beating strong.
Long-forgotten memories began to resurface in my mind. Some of them were familiar, while others didn't even seem to belong to me. I fell into a dream, imagining myself lying in a field of grass and staring up at a sun-drenched blue sky. A large gray moon rested right next to the sun. There were a few pale clouds close to it, but nothing dangerous or dark. I smiled to myself. The scene was comforting. Happy, even.
The imagery changed. I was now standing in a darkened hallway leading to nowhere, a single sunlit window gracing the wall beside me. I began walking, but as I progressed, strange figures began to appear around me. Strange, thoughtless forms shifted into the shapes of people, faces plastered to the floor and walls, even the ceiling in some cases. Newspaper was scattered everywhere. I tried to pick one up, but my hand went right through it as if I were only a ghost. It didn't bother me. In fact, it seemed normal.
An explosion of thoughts hit my mind all at once, a collection of memories and obscure thoughts. I couldn't take it. I screamed in agony, but no one responded. I shouldn't have been surprised; I was the only one there and I always would be. Nothing would ever hurt me again. Nothing. I hoped the guys would be okay without me, because I didn't plan on coming back. Their songs would definitely be different from now on, but I knew they would get through it. They could get through anything as long as they had each other. I would miss them, and to some extent I wished they could join me. But I didn't want to be selfish. Other people needed them more than I did.
The scene returned to the grassy field once again, where the moon had moved ever so slightly in front of the sun. The light was beginning to become obscured. Ominous dark clouds appeared as well, rumbling with thunder and threatening to rain. I wasn't afraid, though. I had nothing to be afraid of.
The clouds cleared away as quickly as they had come, but the sunlight was now gone completely. The moon had completely eclipsed the sun.
My heart froze in awe. I had never seen an eclipse so clearly before, or one so beautiful. The moon was dark, a true black, and seemed to be lit up with white fire from behind. I could die happy now.
I guess it's a good thing, because I heard the extended beep of the heart monitor sound painfully close to my ears, a shrill sound that made the clocks seem easily bearable. I knew all the darkness was gone from my heart when I heard it, and the eclipse became complete.
'I'll see you soon, guys,' I thought to myself, finally able to smile. 'I'll see you on the dark side of the moon.'
I also decided they had no idea what they were talking about.
The doctors were telling my parents that my brain had gone without oxygen for too long, and that if I ever did wake up I would have significant brain damage. That was completely wrong. My brain was fine; nothing was wrong with me. I had almost healed myself, if they kindly would have stayed out of it.
However, their words still brought a wisp of fear to me. If there was something wrong with me, I definitely wanted them to fix it. But it wasn't my brain. My mind was perfectly fine and intact. So was my heart, still beating strong.
Long-forgotten memories began to resurface in my mind. Some of them were familiar, while others didn't even seem to belong to me. I fell into a dream, imagining myself lying in a field of grass and staring up at a sun-drenched blue sky. A large gray moon rested right next to the sun. There were a few pale clouds close to it, but nothing dangerous or dark. I smiled to myself. The scene was comforting. Happy, even.
The imagery changed. I was now standing in a darkened hallway leading to nowhere, a single sunlit window gracing the wall beside me. I began walking, but as I progressed, strange figures began to appear around me. Strange, thoughtless forms shifted into the shapes of people, faces plastered to the floor and walls, even the ceiling in some cases. Newspaper was scattered everywhere. I tried to pick one up, but my hand went right through it as if I were only a ghost. It didn't bother me. In fact, it seemed normal.
An explosion of thoughts hit my mind all at once, a collection of memories and obscure thoughts. I couldn't take it. I screamed in agony, but no one responded. I shouldn't have been surprised; I was the only one there and I always would be. Nothing would ever hurt me again. Nothing. I hoped the guys would be okay without me, because I didn't plan on coming back. Their songs would definitely be different from now on, but I knew they would get through it. They could get through anything as long as they had each other. I would miss them, and to some extent I wished they could join me. But I didn't want to be selfish. Other people needed them more than I did.
The scene returned to the grassy field once again, where the moon had moved ever so slightly in front of the sun. The light was beginning to become obscured. Ominous dark clouds appeared as well, rumbling with thunder and threatening to rain. I wasn't afraid, though. I had nothing to be afraid of.
The clouds cleared away as quickly as they had come, but the sunlight was now gone completely. The moon had completely eclipsed the sun.
My heart froze in awe. I had never seen an eclipse so clearly before, or one so beautiful. The moon was dark, a true black, and seemed to be lit up with white fire from behind. I could die happy now.
I guess it's a good thing, because I heard the extended beep of the heart monitor sound painfully close to my ears, a shrill sound that made the clocks seem easily bearable. I knew all the darkness was gone from my heart when I heard it, and the eclipse became complete.
'I'll see you soon, guys,' I thought to myself, finally able to smile. 'I'll see you on the dark side of the moon.'
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