Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > #9) Never Again, and Never Again
#9) Never Again, and Never Again
3 reviewsRay wakes up and Frank tells him...everything. Their relationship strengthens greatly.
1Hot
Ray was in so much pain that it was unbelievable. He didn't know what to do. Nothing was really making much sense lately, anyways. It was always black. Always. And even though he could swear that he was alive and awake, he didn't see anything. And he couldn't move. Maybe he was blind and paralyzed? Oh well, whatever was dished out, he'd take. He'd done the action, he had to live with the consequences.
Ray tried to move again, but nothing worked. He felt something touching him though. A hand in his hair, fingers trailing his arms, and lips...touching his. Who?
And then he did it, he felt it happen. He willed himself with everything left inside him, and he closed his hand around the one that held his. He did it. But, as soon as he had done that, the pain and darkness took over once more and he felt himself fall into another blissful, yet frightening, coma.
*
Frank barely rose his head as the nurse entered the room for the millionth time to check Ray's vitals and so and so. She walked around him, made a noise in her throat, then turned to him. "Excuse me sir?"
"Yea?" He said, his eyes still closed.
"Um...well, you've been here for quite some time, and I was wondering if you'd like a cot or something to sleep on?" Frankie nodded and she scurried off, returning with a fold out cot and some linens.
"Thanks." He said, folding out the cot and fixing the bed haphazardly. He fell onto it and smothered his face into the flat, shapeless pillow. Sleep overwhelmed him and he fell into a dark oblivion.
*
Ray's eyes shot open and his first reaction and reflex was to scream in pain and agony. He couldn't stop screaming and he couldn't stop crying. Everything hurt. His head was killing him, his leg was on fire, his arms were stiff. He felt as if someone had taken him to the top of bridge and dropped him. Oh wait, that had happened. Except he'd dropped himself.
All of a sudden there was a hand on his face, a panicked stare, and lips on his forehead. He couldn't stop shaking, but he'd stopped screaming. The tears were flowing, but someone was scurrying to clean them up. Frankie.
Wait, wasn't Frankie? "G-g-g-go..." Ray tried to say, but it came out in a muffled sob and Frank shushed him.
"Please, Ray..." Frankie said, a pleading look on his face and deep in his eyes. "Just give me some time to explain. Please Ray, just give me some time."
Ray didn't say anything, he just closed his eyes, everything hurting. He felt like he couldn't breathe. But for some reason, Frankie's presence seemed to calm him some. He felt a little better already. He let Frankie's hands pull up his covers, smooth his hair, dry his face, fluff his pillow... Then it all stopped. An awkward silence filled the room.
"Ray...I need to talk to you..." Came Frankie's voice. Ray tried his hardest to nod, but it hurt.
"O-okay..." He whispered harshly. Frankie sat next to Ray in a chair and took his hand. Ray didn't pull away, but he tensed. Frankie felt it and held on tighter.
He breathed in deeply, his voice wavering before words even came out. "Ray, you're not the reason I took those pills." Ray's eyes shot open, eager to hear this story. "I was talking to my stupid, fucking psych and the only reason I took those pills was because I really wanted to sleep. If I didn't get any sleep for one more second I was going to quit the band..." His voice dropped.
Ray tried to talk, but all he could manage at the moment was a 'mmf'.
"I feel so fucking bad for what I did to Gee...and what I did to you..." He said, tears griping his voice and pinching his throat. "I-I...truth is Ray...I fucking love you."
*
Gerard groaned as he felt hands grip his shoulders and shake. "What the hell..." He muttered. He opened his eyes, seeing Mikey's excited face looming over him.
"Get up, get up!" He exclaimed. "Ray woke up today! Frankie just to talked us, and we're going over there right now!" Gerard shot up in bed and hurriedly pulled his pants on and tripped over his own feet trying to slip on a pair of flip flops. No time for make-up. He put on a Misfits t-shirt and grabbed his keys. Mikey and Bob were already in the car. He jumped in, started it, and drove off, twenty miles over the speed limit.
*
Frankie pressed his lips to Ray's. Ray pushed back, eager. Frank ran his tongue over Ray's bottom lip and Ray opened his mouth, letting Frankie taste him thoroughly. He gasped as Frankie sucked on his tongue lightly. Ray ran his tongue over Frankie's lip ring and pulled at it gently with his teeth. Frankie moaned softly and pushed himself into Ray more. Ray put his hands in Frankie's hair and pulled. Frankie groaned louder.
"Jesus, Ray..." He whispered. Ray just held on tighter and pushed his tongue roughly into Frankie's mouth.
"Umm..ya?" Came a small voice from the back of the room. Frankie pulled away from Ray fast, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand, and flipped his hair over his eyes. He leaned back in his chair, trying to hide his reddening face.
"Um...well that was.../interesting/..." Gerard said, walking over to the bed and looking down at Frankie. "I guess everything is resolved then?"
"Yea...Gee, I'm really fucking sorry." He said. Gerard just reached out and put his hand under Frankie's chin and tilted his face up to look at him. He kissed him on the cheek.
"It's okay. We all have ways of working out anger and shit. Besides...while it lasted, it was fun." Ray gasped. "But Ray deserves you more, and you better be good to him, or I'll fucking kill you, Frank Anthony Iero."
Frank nodded as the other's walked in. "Frankie! Ray!" Mikey said, running up to them and jumping on Frankie's lap. He kissed his on the forehead. "Hey, bitch. Where've you been lately?"
Frankie just laughed and shoved Mikey to the floor as Bob walked over to Ray's bedside and looked down. "Hey, Ray-man."
"Hey...Bob." He managed to say, his lips still longing for Frankie's touch.
"How you feeling?" He asked.
"Uh...g-g-good I guess." He mumbled. Bob nodded. Ray could barely remember the night of the accident, but one thing he remembered most was that it was Bob that had found and saved him. "Thank you, man...y-you f-fucking saved my life."
Bob just nodded again. "It's okay."
*
Frankie helped Ray stand for the fifth time that day so he could wobble over the bathroom. He wasn't steady on his feet due to the fact that he had a heavy cast on, and he had been in bed for almost a month now. He leaned against Frankie, putting all his wait on him as Frankie helped him to the bathroom.
"I know how gay this sounds, but I don't think I can stand and take a piss at the same time...help me?" Frankie just smiled and laughed and helped Ray keep standing while he used the restroom and then washed his hands. They came back into the room and the doctor was standing there, impatiently tapping his foot.
"Mr. Toro...you know that you should not even be up...especially trying to stand!" He said, his voice rising. "Please."
"I'm sorry. I just hate staying in bed all day when I've been in bed for a month now." He said, Frankie helping him back into a bed and switching on the T.V. "All I care about is getting up and around and leaving this place."
"You won't be leaving for at least two more days." The doctor said, leaving the room and returning with a nurse with a syringe.
"What's that for?" Ray asked as the nurse came over to his IV getting ready to inject the stuff. He pushed her away.
"To help you sleep tonight." The doctor said and waved the nurse on.
Ray pushed her away again. "I don't need it. I'm fine." The nurse looked at the doctor and her motioned with his hand. They both left the room and Frankie sighed, sitting on the bed next to Ray. Ray scooted over and Frank climbed all the way in, laying next to Ray, his head on Ray's shoulder.
"God, that doctor's a bastard." Frankie mumbled. Ray nodded and switched channels to MTV2. Just in time to watch their own music video for the millionth time. "God, they've mainstreamed our shit way to damn much."
"Yep." Ray said, turning the channel again. There was nothing to watch. "So...I'm bored."
"Me too." Frankie said, turning to face Ray. He kissed him gently on his full, gorgeous lips. "Mmm." He muttered.
"Mmm what?" Ray said, pushing against Frankie. Frankie felt aroused, horny even. God, Ray was gorgeous. Frankie just shook his head and stood. He walked over to the door. Thank god they moved him to a regular room today. He locked the door and turned back.
"Ray, I need to ask you something." Frankie said, coming to sit next to Ray again. Ray nodded, wanting him to continue. "Well...you know that I love you...but do you really love me?"
"Mm, yes. Why wouldn't I?" He asked.
"Because of what I did to you." Frankie mumbled. Ray grabbed Frankie's arm and pulled him down so that Frank's head was laying on Ray's chest.
"I don't care." Ray said, fingering Frankie's hair lovingly. "I mean, it really wasn't your fault. You were just convinced that that was what had happened. I don't blame you. I fucking love you, Frankie."
Frank smiled. Ray loved him? Life couldn't get better. Never again, and never gain would he pull that same shit. Ray seemed to hear his thoughts.
"Never again..." He muttered.
"Hm?"
"Please...Frankie. There are better ways to get to sleep." Ray said pleadingly. "Never again, Frankie. If you need help sleeping, if you have problems, if you have questions...I'm here. And never again pull that type of shit Frankie."
Frankie nodded, running his hand over Ray's bare chest. "Well, I'll promise you that. But you promise me that no matter how hard life gets, you won't try to kill yourself either, babe."
"I promise..." Ray said, reaching for Frankie's hand and lacing his fingers with Frankie's. "Did you call me babe?"
"Mm, yea...I mean, if you don't want me to th-then I won't."
"No...I like it."
"Really?"
"Yea, I like to know that I finally have you as my own, Frankie." Ray said with a smile.
"Me, too." Frankie said, snuggling up to Ray. Ray sighed and held Frankie closer. "Sooo...you said if I needed help sleeping, you were there...how are you gonna help me sleep Ray?"
Ray tried to move again, but nothing worked. He felt something touching him though. A hand in his hair, fingers trailing his arms, and lips...touching his. Who?
And then he did it, he felt it happen. He willed himself with everything left inside him, and he closed his hand around the one that held his. He did it. But, as soon as he had done that, the pain and darkness took over once more and he felt himself fall into another blissful, yet frightening, coma.
*
Frank barely rose his head as the nurse entered the room for the millionth time to check Ray's vitals and so and so. She walked around him, made a noise in her throat, then turned to him. "Excuse me sir?"
"Yea?" He said, his eyes still closed.
"Um...well, you've been here for quite some time, and I was wondering if you'd like a cot or something to sleep on?" Frankie nodded and she scurried off, returning with a fold out cot and some linens.
"Thanks." He said, folding out the cot and fixing the bed haphazardly. He fell onto it and smothered his face into the flat, shapeless pillow. Sleep overwhelmed him and he fell into a dark oblivion.
*
Ray's eyes shot open and his first reaction and reflex was to scream in pain and agony. He couldn't stop screaming and he couldn't stop crying. Everything hurt. His head was killing him, his leg was on fire, his arms were stiff. He felt as if someone had taken him to the top of bridge and dropped him. Oh wait, that had happened. Except he'd dropped himself.
All of a sudden there was a hand on his face, a panicked stare, and lips on his forehead. He couldn't stop shaking, but he'd stopped screaming. The tears were flowing, but someone was scurrying to clean them up. Frankie.
Wait, wasn't Frankie? "G-g-g-go..." Ray tried to say, but it came out in a muffled sob and Frank shushed him.
"Please, Ray..." Frankie said, a pleading look on his face and deep in his eyes. "Just give me some time to explain. Please Ray, just give me some time."
Ray didn't say anything, he just closed his eyes, everything hurting. He felt like he couldn't breathe. But for some reason, Frankie's presence seemed to calm him some. He felt a little better already. He let Frankie's hands pull up his covers, smooth his hair, dry his face, fluff his pillow... Then it all stopped. An awkward silence filled the room.
"Ray...I need to talk to you..." Came Frankie's voice. Ray tried his hardest to nod, but it hurt.
"O-okay..." He whispered harshly. Frankie sat next to Ray in a chair and took his hand. Ray didn't pull away, but he tensed. Frankie felt it and held on tighter.
He breathed in deeply, his voice wavering before words even came out. "Ray, you're not the reason I took those pills." Ray's eyes shot open, eager to hear this story. "I was talking to my stupid, fucking psych and the only reason I took those pills was because I really wanted to sleep. If I didn't get any sleep for one more second I was going to quit the band..." His voice dropped.
Ray tried to talk, but all he could manage at the moment was a 'mmf'.
"I feel so fucking bad for what I did to Gee...and what I did to you..." He said, tears griping his voice and pinching his throat. "I-I...truth is Ray...I fucking love you."
*
Gerard groaned as he felt hands grip his shoulders and shake. "What the hell..." He muttered. He opened his eyes, seeing Mikey's excited face looming over him.
"Get up, get up!" He exclaimed. "Ray woke up today! Frankie just to talked us, and we're going over there right now!" Gerard shot up in bed and hurriedly pulled his pants on and tripped over his own feet trying to slip on a pair of flip flops. No time for make-up. He put on a Misfits t-shirt and grabbed his keys. Mikey and Bob were already in the car. He jumped in, started it, and drove off, twenty miles over the speed limit.
*
Frankie pressed his lips to Ray's. Ray pushed back, eager. Frank ran his tongue over Ray's bottom lip and Ray opened his mouth, letting Frankie taste him thoroughly. He gasped as Frankie sucked on his tongue lightly. Ray ran his tongue over Frankie's lip ring and pulled at it gently with his teeth. Frankie moaned softly and pushed himself into Ray more. Ray put his hands in Frankie's hair and pulled. Frankie groaned louder.
"Jesus, Ray..." He whispered. Ray just held on tighter and pushed his tongue roughly into Frankie's mouth.
"Umm..ya?" Came a small voice from the back of the room. Frankie pulled away from Ray fast, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand, and flipped his hair over his eyes. He leaned back in his chair, trying to hide his reddening face.
"Um...well that was.../interesting/..." Gerard said, walking over to the bed and looking down at Frankie. "I guess everything is resolved then?"
"Yea...Gee, I'm really fucking sorry." He said. Gerard just reached out and put his hand under Frankie's chin and tilted his face up to look at him. He kissed him on the cheek.
"It's okay. We all have ways of working out anger and shit. Besides...while it lasted, it was fun." Ray gasped. "But Ray deserves you more, and you better be good to him, or I'll fucking kill you, Frank Anthony Iero."
Frank nodded as the other's walked in. "Frankie! Ray!" Mikey said, running up to them and jumping on Frankie's lap. He kissed his on the forehead. "Hey, bitch. Where've you been lately?"
Frankie just laughed and shoved Mikey to the floor as Bob walked over to Ray's bedside and looked down. "Hey, Ray-man."
"Hey...Bob." He managed to say, his lips still longing for Frankie's touch.
"How you feeling?" He asked.
"Uh...g-g-good I guess." He mumbled. Bob nodded. Ray could barely remember the night of the accident, but one thing he remembered most was that it was Bob that had found and saved him. "Thank you, man...y-you f-fucking saved my life."
Bob just nodded again. "It's okay."
*
Frankie helped Ray stand for the fifth time that day so he could wobble over the bathroom. He wasn't steady on his feet due to the fact that he had a heavy cast on, and he had been in bed for almost a month now. He leaned against Frankie, putting all his wait on him as Frankie helped him to the bathroom.
"I know how gay this sounds, but I don't think I can stand and take a piss at the same time...help me?" Frankie just smiled and laughed and helped Ray keep standing while he used the restroom and then washed his hands. They came back into the room and the doctor was standing there, impatiently tapping his foot.
"Mr. Toro...you know that you should not even be up...especially trying to stand!" He said, his voice rising. "Please."
"I'm sorry. I just hate staying in bed all day when I've been in bed for a month now." He said, Frankie helping him back into a bed and switching on the T.V. "All I care about is getting up and around and leaving this place."
"You won't be leaving for at least two more days." The doctor said, leaving the room and returning with a nurse with a syringe.
"What's that for?" Ray asked as the nurse came over to his IV getting ready to inject the stuff. He pushed her away.
"To help you sleep tonight." The doctor said and waved the nurse on.
Ray pushed her away again. "I don't need it. I'm fine." The nurse looked at the doctor and her motioned with his hand. They both left the room and Frankie sighed, sitting on the bed next to Ray. Ray scooted over and Frank climbed all the way in, laying next to Ray, his head on Ray's shoulder.
"God, that doctor's a bastard." Frankie mumbled. Ray nodded and switched channels to MTV2. Just in time to watch their own music video for the millionth time. "God, they've mainstreamed our shit way to damn much."
"Yep." Ray said, turning the channel again. There was nothing to watch. "So...I'm bored."
"Me too." Frankie said, turning to face Ray. He kissed him gently on his full, gorgeous lips. "Mmm." He muttered.
"Mmm what?" Ray said, pushing against Frankie. Frankie felt aroused, horny even. God, Ray was gorgeous. Frankie just shook his head and stood. He walked over to the door. Thank god they moved him to a regular room today. He locked the door and turned back.
"Ray, I need to ask you something." Frankie said, coming to sit next to Ray again. Ray nodded, wanting him to continue. "Well...you know that I love you...but do you really love me?"
"Mm, yes. Why wouldn't I?" He asked.
"Because of what I did to you." Frankie mumbled. Ray grabbed Frankie's arm and pulled him down so that Frank's head was laying on Ray's chest.
"I don't care." Ray said, fingering Frankie's hair lovingly. "I mean, it really wasn't your fault. You were just convinced that that was what had happened. I don't blame you. I fucking love you, Frankie."
Frank smiled. Ray loved him? Life couldn't get better. Never again, and never gain would he pull that same shit. Ray seemed to hear his thoughts.
"Never again..." He muttered.
"Hm?"
"Please...Frankie. There are better ways to get to sleep." Ray said pleadingly. "Never again, Frankie. If you need help sleeping, if you have problems, if you have questions...I'm here. And never again pull that type of shit Frankie."
Frankie nodded, running his hand over Ray's bare chest. "Well, I'll promise you that. But you promise me that no matter how hard life gets, you won't try to kill yourself either, babe."
"I promise..." Ray said, reaching for Frankie's hand and lacing his fingers with Frankie's. "Did you call me babe?"
"Mm, yea...I mean, if you don't want me to th-then I won't."
"No...I like it."
"Really?"
"Yea, I like to know that I finally have you as my own, Frankie." Ray said with a smile.
"Me, too." Frankie said, snuggling up to Ray. Ray sighed and held Frankie closer. "Sooo...you said if I needed help sleeping, you were there...how are you gonna help me sleep Ray?"
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