FicWad

I woke up the next morning to the sound of someone groaning and cursing under their breath. I had a feeling who it was, and sure enough I saw Frank lying on his back, hand against his forhead, eyes screwed up in pain from an obvious hangover. Gerard was still asleep, slumped over the bunk. Frank turned his head and saw him. For a second he looked confused then he seemed to remember something and smiled weakly. He poked Gee who woke with a start, I guess I havent been noticed yet...
"Hmmm....Frankie?" Asked Gerard sleepily, Frank smiled and pulled Gerard into a tight hug. Gerard looked shocked.
"Thankyou for last night...I cant remember much but I do remember you sitting with me whilst I puked..." Said Frank, Gerard returned the hug.
"Its ok Frank, I would never leave you." He said, Frank slowly pulled away. "Why did you do all that Frank, all the drinking, that drug...you know what it all did to me. Why did you do it?" Asked Gerard. Frank looked shocked, then he seemed to remember and looked ashamed.
"I was...upset..." He mumbled.
"What about?" Asked Gerard. Frank looked away from Gee's face and became very interested in the wall opposite. Gerard put his hand on Franks. "Come on Frank, you know you can tell me anything..." He said kindly. Frank shook his head, a tear rolling down his cheek.
"Not this time." He whispered. Gerard pulled away slightly, looking hurt. "Will you make me a coffee?" Asked Frank, he sounded like he was about to cry. Gerard nodded sadly and left, seconds later I watched in horror as Frank brushed a tear away, long red gashes visible down the underside of his wrist and arm.

I left the tourbus in the afternoon, Frank was there on his own, Gerard and Mikey had gone for a walk. (Only god knows why!) and Ray was off doing something or other, I dont think I was really listening when he told me where. I was going to buy some stuff from the small shop attached to the gas station we were in, but as I passed the other bus I decided to see how Joyce was doing. I knocked on the door and was glad when she opened it, pulling on a jacket.
"Bob! Hey!" She said birghtly, I couldnt be bothered to return the greeting and instead pulled her into a kiss, she didnt resist and when we pulled away she was grinning at me.
"Wow..." She mumbled.
"Sorry just...felt like doing that" I said. Joyce's grin went wider.
"No need to apologize...I was just on my way to buy something, want to come with?" She asked. I nodded, and we walked into the shop. Now, the strangest thing happened. Obviously I've been getting along with Joyce and I really like her. But for some strange reason, as she peered at the chocolate bars, wondering which to get - it hit me. Like when you run as fast as you can towards an 'open' french door, only to collide full speed into solid glass! I suddenly realised, I loved her, I loved her more than words could say and I didnt want her to go. I just wanted to grab her and never let go, I walked over to her and pulled her into a hug, she giggled and turned to look at me.
"Whats up?" She asked. I smiled and shook my head.
"Nothing...hey, do you mind if I go. I need to talk to Frank...erm...will you come on another date with me tommorow night?" I asked. Joyce nodded looking confused, I smiled and quickly kissed her on the lips before rushing out of the shop.
"FRANK! FRANK! I NEED TO TALK TO YOU! FRAAANK!" I yelled. AGH! Where is that little munchkin!? Ok...now I'm being mean...but where the fuck is he? I need to talk to him, I need to know how to propose!
I ran down the bus, not finding him. I guess he must be in the bathroom and I knocked loudly on the door. No answer, there was just a still silence.
"Frank?" I asked, knocking on the door again. Slowly it opened, Frank poked his head round the door and looked at me, he was pale... "Are you ok?" I asked. He nodded weakly and gave me a small smile.
"Yeah, whats up?" He asked. I launched right into it.
"I want to propose to Joyce! How did you propose to Jamia? what do I do? Can you give me some tips?" I asked. Frank raised an eyebrow.
"What? Am I the expert now?" He asked. I nodded desperately. Frank sighed.
"I dont know Bob, just do what you want" He said trying to close the door, but I stopped it with my foot. Something was wrong. I pushed on the door, Frank seemed to have been expecting this and moved away, giving up already. Inside everything was normal, other than the razor blade clutched in his hand, the blood dripping off his wrists. It came as no shock and I merely sighed.
"Frank...you know this isnt the way to feel better about things" I said taking the blade off him and putting his bleeding wrist under the cold tap. Frank nodded and tears spilled down his cheeks. I cleaned up his wrist then began to dab at it with a towel.
"So. Are you going to tell me whats bothering me?" I asked. Frank nodded.
"I....I love Gerard but I love Jamia and...I was gonna marry her but I...I want to be with Gerard so I told her that I didnt know what to do...she took it really well and said she knew I loved Gee...She said she wasnt mad and that...that...that I should be with Gerard and...I dont think he'll want to be with me...because...because he was only...only joking around...and I never meant it as a joke...I was always serious!" Frank burst into a tears and I pulled him into a hug.
"Frank, I think I've told you this before when you told me you loved Gerard - Gee loves you Frank, its killing him to know you love Jamia, last night Frank, I've never seen anyone care for someone in such a tender and loving way - it sounds so corny but its true. He loves you and your both idiots for believing that it wont work out." I said, Frank looked at me and nodded, smiling weakly.
"So...when are you going to propose to Joyce?"