FicWad

Disclaimer: The characters used are not mine but are copyright of Sega and SonicTeam. Words are mine though!

Author's Notes: The final chapter, and Shadow is actually in this one. haha. Hooray! This is the first story I've finished in a loooong time, and I really enjoyed writing it and I am kind of proud of the final piece? Maybe? Just a little bit? I most likely will go over the entire story again and try to fix a few errors. I'm sure there is at least one or more in 15589 words. I am far, far from perfect! Anyway, I really hope that all of you enjoy this and how I ended it.

Oh! If you haven't just read the previous chapters, I suggest you go back and read them again now. There are quite a few references from past chapters in this and one large reference from the first chapter. So you may appreciate this a whole lot more if you go and refresh your memory.

Since this is in fact the end of the line for this story, (I'm not promising a sequel but it has crossed my mind o.O) I would absolutely love to hear what everyone thinks of it on a whole. Constructive criticism is welcome of course, I'd love to improve this any way I can.

So, on with the reading!

Reminder: This story is completely AU (alternate universe.)

-----




Hidden


Chapter Four: Only One




I sit on my bed hunched over, my elbows leaning on my knees and I've been twirling a white-gold band, for at least the past fifteen minutes, that has been sitting in my bureau for nearly a year. It has been untouched and forgotten about and yet it has never lost its meaning.

I slip it on my finger, staring at it and thinking of what it symbolizes. It is very small, plain, and isn't quite along the lines of gaudy but it glistens in my eyes. I bought this for us, on a whim yes, but out of some kind of love that I had in me. I actually regret not giving this to him now. Who knows what could have happened if he had known I was this serious about him...if I had realized I was this serious about him.

I've been in my apartment for the last half hour or so, and I begin to pace around my living room. A million things have been just soaring through my head. Shadow, Amy, what to say to Shadow, how I'd react to not getting him back or even getting him back.

One thing that actually makes me feel better about breaking up with Amy is that I know now that I let her free to find someone who will treat her right. I was fake with her, completely false. Our whole relationship was a lie. Now, she can find someone who will fall in love with her and it will be nothing but real. She really is a wonderful girl and I wish that sometime we can talk again. And hopefully when we do, she is unbelievably happy because I want nothing more for her. It's something I don't think she could ever achieve with me- true happiness

I get tired of pacing and I flop down on my couch and glance at the clock, wondering if I should see him tonight or wait until tomorrow morning to think of where I can even begin explaining myself to him.

I cling on to a bit of hope that he didn't find out about the engagement. It could make my life somewhat easier when I do eventually muster enough courage to go over there.

Courage? That's something I've never been without...

The clock reads 10:05.

It's not late, but I don't want to go over there, ready to spill my heart to him and then him not be there...or with someone else.

My eyes widen at the thought of someone else. That's something I have never even considered yet. What if he did begin seeing someone? It's something he would do. Shadow is spiteful, and the fact that I chose Amy over him, or that he probably found out about the engagement, would send him off with another guy/girl just to hurt me.

I lean back onto the soft cushions, my heart in disbelief, my face in shock, as if what I had just thought were true.

His mouth on some one else's, his hands on them...I practically cringe.

I suddenly feel some kind of insight to how Shadow and even Amy felt. The thought of someone I love being shared? I can't even comprehend how hurt I'd be.

I run my hands over my face, my brown jacket slipping up my arms as they lift; I breathe for a few moments, hoping with my life that these thoughts are false.

I need to know now; I need to tell him now. Waiting just turns my mind against me. I can't afford to lose another minute without him. I need to make up for lost time. The time he lost knowing that I am only his, something he never had. I need to give him that; I need to give myself that.

I jump off of my couch as my legs guide me to the door without hesitation. I don't even lock it on my way out as it sways closed behind me.

I run down the stairs of my apartment building, rushing past one of my neighbors. She is an older falcon, with powder blue feathers, a long camel coat, and a matching hat. I nearly knock the bags out of her hand as she moves aside to let me speed by.

"Oh! Sonic."

I turn around at the bottom of the steps, walking backwards, unable to stop movement flowing through my feet as she stands at the middle of the stairs, probably thanking God that she kept her balance with her things in hand. "Sorry Mrs. Wimble." I say apologetically.

She straightens her hat, tucking the bag under one arm. "Where are you off too in such a hurry, young man?" She asks with a humble and concerned tone.

I'm already at the door and her question throws a smile on my face. "To get my boyfriend back!"

I yell it so loud that I know at least one whole floor had to of heard it in that building, and as I fling open the door to leave, I hear her mumble in confusion, "boyfriend?"

I don't care who knows it. In fact, I want the world to know. Screw my image, screw being the perfect hero. I am in love with Shadow the Hedgehog!

I have this overwhelming feeling of adrenaline pumping through me and I'm on my feet, running as fast as I can down the pavement that I don't even care about the brisk night air that is beginning to chap my face.

This route I've ran so many times. Down to the house with that black Great Dane that always barks its head off at me, to the corner barber that is always empty, down the main highway swerving in and out of cars, past the main mall, all the way down to his apartment complex. As I approach closer and closer, my heart feels like it is being pulled down by gravity, but then it feels so light I need to pull it down from above my head.

One block away and I slow down to a fast pace walk, not that I am tired, but that I am nervous. That rush of adrenaline I had is beginning to fade and I realize again that I'm going to have to actually say something to get him back. He isn't just going to fall into my arms and love me again. That's not how it works, especially not with Shadow...maybe Amy, but not Shadow.

I'm at the front door of the building, and luckily enough a couple is on their way out and hold the door for me so I don't have to have him buzz me in. The element of surprise, that's what I like to do.

I choose against the elevator again and begin walking up the stairs. My speed seems to get slower and slower every step I take.

Maybe I'm not ready to do this. Will he really take me back? It could actually be better if our breakup stays this way because if I go up there are find someone else in his apartment, I don't know how I'd react. I could have a complete fit and lash out like a crazy person, or I may take the opposite road and break down and cry right there-not something that I really want people to see me go through.

I halt at that thought. Worrying about my image is what got me in this mess in the first place. I need to stop trying to let the world see a perfect hero when I know that I'm not because no one is. Even sometimes I am so far from being perfect it's ridiculous.

I take a deep breath and realize I am on his floor, at the end of the hallway, staring at the door of his apartment. Now the nervousness is even more present. I feel like I am in a play, behind the curtains that are about to rise for the first act and I know none of my lines. I really wish I knew my lines.

This is way too much stress for one night.

I begin walking down the hallway that I swear has a million eyes and they are all focused on me, refusing to blink. I step over the brown indoor-outdoor carpet turned up in a few places, past the chipped paint on only the right side of the wall, past the flickering light above apartment D7 and I stand at his door, staring; mentally yelling at it to tell me something, anything, begging it to let me know what the right thing to say is when I know I will probably say everything but.

I raise my first to knock on the door and I freeze. I hear movement inside, telling me that he, or someone, is home. This is something I want to do, something I need to do and when I am right in front of this door I cannot quit now. It's just...hard, and I find myself suddenly sweating and practically shaking.

At least I know he is home.

I knock once. I realize it was just below the sound level of a tap and I take a deep breath and knock three more times, but louder.

The movement I heard just a moment ago shifts closer and closer to the obstacle that separates it between us. The door knob rattles and it swings open...

...and swings right back shut.

I saw him for a brief moment; not even a second. He held the door in his black furry hand but slammed it right back in my face just when he realized who it was.

I hang my head, almost feeling defeated, but a part of me kicks in that I haven't felt before. I feel myself surfacing, the me that I used to know so well. I'm Sonic the Hedgehog. I am a persistent little bastard, and I don't give up that easily.

I knock again.

"If you've come for your wedding present, Mr. Rose, you'll have to wait. I haven't quite brought myself to wrap a big 'Fuck you' yet. Give me a few weeks." His dark, cold, sarcastic remark permeates through the white wooden door.

He's obviously found out about the engagement. My last strand of hope that he hasn't found out has just flew through the window to commit suicide.

I bite my bottom lip, starting to falter again, that breeze of confidence starting to slip. I can't let it though; it's the only thing I have left to hold onto right now.

"Open the door, Shadow. I need to talk to you." I say surprisingly not desperate.

"And I don't need to listen. If you would ever so kindly, get the hell away from my front door, I'd appreciate it."

I look up at the ceiling, debating on how I could get him to open the door, and then the most obvious words come to my head. "If I told you I left her, then would you open it?"

Silence.

My heart pounds and the silence begins to sting. I need some kind of response, anything. The door opening, followed by an 'I love you,' with him bringing me into a heart-felt hug...Only in the movies, Sonic, only in the damn movies.

I hear the door click and it slowly sways open. He stands there, his crimson eyes staring directly into mine, waiting for me to say something.

But I cannot speak, just see. He looks strong, but somewhat worn. His eyes droop with lack of sleep. His quills are as usual, upturned, but jagged, as if he hasn't touched them in days. His red button shirt is unbuttoned at the top, followed by a crooked black tie hanging loosely around his neck and the fabric of shirt is untucked from his black pants.

I look past him and notice that his apartment is a mess. I can see clothes flung over his chairs and end tables, trash scattered on the floor, a few empty pizza boxes...I have nothing but perplexed feelings because Shadow was always one to be very neat and enjoyed his own cooking.

He notices me looking past him and narrows the entrance to his apartment with the door a bit so I'd stop gazing.

"Well?" He says, somewhat with an annoyed tone.

He slips me back into the state of mind where I need to start talking or else I might never get him back. I try to speak but my mouth goes dry and my throat tenses. Even if I knew what to say I don't think I'd be able to get anything out.

He shakes his head with an aggravated breath and begins to close the door. This practically gives me an instant shock and I throw my hand on the door to stop it. I manage to leave a space open just before it's able to shut. "Wait! Just hear me out, okay?"

I can tell he is thinking whether or not he wants to listen or just throw the door in my face.

He opens it wider again, "two minutes."

I take a deep breath, not knowing what to say, but I figure I'll start with leaving Amy.

"Tonight...I visited Amy's parents' house for dinner to celebrate our engagement. I managed to keep up the act half-way through it but...I had to break it off. I couldn't deal with being fake with her anymore; the engagement was even a mistake. I prefer being real with you. I am myself with you, I can let go with you. Since we haven't been together, I lost who I am. I'm less confident, depressed, paranoid, weak...I just lost myself because I know now that you are my other half. I am my best and realest with you and I feel complete. I love you. I don't know how else to say it. I have nothing without you, and you're my only one."

I feel like every one of those words were strung together and didn't exactly make sense but I don't care because they were all true. I haven't spilt my feelings like that before to anyone and I almost blush beneath my fur.

He is quiet, most likely trying to process whatever the hell I just said.

I notice that I am twirling the identical white-gold band to the one I "gave" to Amy on my left hand out of nervousness.

I decide to go further, realizing that I need to explain more to him. "The engagement was a complete mistake with her. She found a ring that I bought for you and..." I take a deep breath, curl my lips in and drop my arms to my side. "...I just love you and I don't want to be with anyone besides."

I'm not sure what else to say, I just keep twirling the ring around and around on my finger with my thumb, faster and faster with each passing second that he doesn't say anything.

He takes a step forward and leans on the doorway just in front of me. "So...what? You expect me to stick my tongue down your throat and think everything is better?"

I have a feeling this is going to end badly. I hold back a wince.

"Two years, Sonic. Two fucking years you stuck me in the dark like I was nothing to the world and I was only convenient when no one else was around. You made me feel low. When I told you that you were the worst thing that has ever happened to me I meant it, you are. I may have loved you but you put me through hell. You ripped my emotions to shreds and now, after two goddamned years, I realize the word 'love' is just bullshit and I leave you. Now that I am gone is when you realize that I'm actually good enough for the big hero? Well, fuck you, Sonic. I'm done. There's the right thing to do, the wrong thing to do, and then the right time to do the right thing and your ship has sailed. You're too late. Now kindly leave your copy of my key because you didn't before."

I stand there completely astounded and he stands there hard as a rock with his arms folded against his chest and a stern stare at me. I feel sadness welling in me and I reach in my pocket to grab his key. Meanwhile, I am shifting my jaw out and biting my lip, trying to prevent tears and take this like a man, which I am doing rather well actually.

I pull the keys out of my dark brown coat and slip his out of the key-ring. Before I hand it to him, I get an idea and I reach back into my pocket. I pull out the white-gold band, curl it in my fist with his key and hand it to his now outstretched hand.
I look him in the eye as he holds his fist closed, not looking at the contents. "I love you, Shadow. I always have." And I look at him one last time before turning down the hallway to go to the elevator.

I never take the elevator.

I don't even look back as I walk between the opening steel doors. I feel like I don't even have enough strength in me to attempt the stairs. It was all sucked out of me in that short, hardly ten-minutes conversation.

I click the number one, and then I collapse against the wall, my heart left in that hallway. I could be stabbed 20 times and I wouldn't feel this bad.

I let my mind drift as I begin to go down a floor. I think maybe he is rushing down the stairs now, regretting what all he had just said.

I stand up straight.

He'll run to the elevator door and wait for me with a smug look on his face. He'll say, "Gotcha" and then this will all be a happy ending to this week of hell.

I stand there as the light above the door highlights the number one and I believe he will be on the other side of the door. He will be there, I know it. It's completely something he would pull!

The doors part and I am welcomed with an empty hallway that leads to the exit of the building.

Disappointment fills the emptiness that he practically gift-wrapped for me.

I just feel like utter shit, to be blunt. There is really no other way to describe this. As I walk under the night sky, the stars laughing at me, the moon feeling sorry for me, I think back on the insane night I had. I go to a girl's house, put on an act with her parents, I've been putting on an act with her for three years, and then I break her heart. And then, I decide to get back the only thing that can make me feel better, and the whole situation ends up worse.

Before I had two, and now I have nothing.

I walk slowly on the sidewalk, dragging my feet along like there was a ball and chain attached to my ankles. I don't even know where I am going; I just keep focusing on the empty and cold look he kept on me, like I was no one. There was no love in his eyes. He's forgotten me. It's over completely now. I've just had my closure and now I am left alone.

I see a rock lying in the middle of the pavement and kick it as hard as I can, focusing all of my pain and aggression in that tiny rock, watching it fly off into the middle of the street.

I need to run.

That rush of adrenaline I felt before has now surfaced again with a different emotion: anger. I feel like I did that night when he first left me, déjà vu. I feel like he's left me again and I run as fast as I can, wanting to run away from my emotions, this world, him, her, myself, everything. I just want out.

The wind throws itself at me as I charge for it in no particular direction and the atmosphere begins to change strangely darker around me and the streets seem tighter, dirtier. Nonetheless, I pump my legs harder and harder, faster and faster, not caring about anything or even if I run smack into something, I just need out.

I can almost feel fire beneath the rubber of my sneakers.

I stop.

"Jack's Tavern," I mumble to myself as I read the sign that really says 'Ja k's vern-' the bulbs were burnt out. I'm in the last place that I would ever think I would be again, especially tonight.

Marenden.

I manage to laugh very briefly to myself because of the irony and I push open the wooden door with a creek that I haven't touched in two years.

It's dark inside, just as it was before. The tables scattered around the room are accompanied by a few depressed drunks with their heads hanging loosely above drinks that they keep stirring with those tiny straws.

I have a feeling I'll be doing the same thing.

I walk over to the bar and see if I can remember the stool that I sat on last time I was here, and as soon as I sit down on one and wobble, I realize I have.

I shake my head with a tiny smile, still unable to believe I ended up here subconsciously. I guess, in a break up, when you're at the end, you end up thinking back on the beginning.

"What'll ya have?"

To my surprise, a squirrel that resembled a sailor without the uniform stood before me on the other side of the bar. The same bartender actually still works here. "Oh uh, I'll have a vodka and orange juice, please."

"Screwdriver," he mumbles to himself and proceeds to fix my drink.

I swing my feet a bit on the stool and mouth to myself just under a whisper "Hm, a vodka drinker. I'll have a gin and tonic..."

I shake my head, a frown stinging my face. I know that the extent of this visit will be me sitting here, alone, thinking of the one individual who should be here but won't. Why did I bother to even come here?

The bartender grabs a coaster and almost throws it in front of me and then places my drink on top of it. I go to say thank you, but then remember it will just end up with a grunt from him, instead I just look down at my drink.

"Whaddya want?"

I look back up at him confused, wondering why he would ask me that again since he just handed me my drink.

"Noth-"

I'm interrupted by another voice that takes the seat beside me, "gin and tonic's fine."

The bartender nods at him and I turn my head to the one individual that I wished to be here, attempting to keep my jaw attached so it won't fall flat on the floor.

He just nonchalantly sat beside me and now looks at me with the faintest smile, as if our past argument hadn't just happened.

He thought for a moment as the bartender silently puts his drink down in front of him, "How about we move to a table instead?"

I smile at him and nod, taking the drink in my hand and follow him towards a table not too far from the bar. How my stool wobbled earlier? Now the table does that.

We set our drinks down and sit across from each other. He immediately grabs my hand, but slowly. He goes to say something, but stupidly, I speak first. "How did you know I was here?"

Well, I certainly feel my old self coming back again; interrupting people when they want to say something. Good 'ol me.

He shrugs lightly, "You weren't at your apartment, and this is the first place that came to mind."

I smile lightly and look down at his hand holding mine. I notice a slight glimmer to one of his fingers and it matches the same glimmer coming from one of mine. He has the band on.

I look back up at him, a serious look now thrown on my face, desperate to hear what he has to say and my insides are taken over with excitement.

He looks into my eyes, as if he was searching for something. "Did you mean what you said? That I'm the only one?"

I nod.

"And that you don't care about your image?"

Again.

That look forms on his face. That look where he isn't quite smiling, but smirking, and you could just tell he was smiling on the inside.

I love that look.

"That's all I need to know."

I pull my other hand to his and hold onto it tightly, feeling the ring against my skin. I have an overwhelming feeling of happiness that I can almost light up the entire room with this smile that I can't even begin to peel off my face.

Nothing else needs to be said, our expressions are enough to speak to each other. He was never one for the sap speeches, neither am I actually. The ring on his finger speaks louder then anything that could ever be said. We could sit here in silence for another four hours and I'd still be just as overwhelmed with happiness as I am now. I have him, I have my only one.

"How about we get out of this dump?" I ask with a smirk.

He nods lightly, "agreed."

We both stand up from the table, leaving our drinks there with money under one. I can feel my shoes sticking to the floor and I just laugh lightly at it as we leave together with our arms linked-something we've never done in public besides that night we met. This is how the memory ends. We just added something else in the mix this time.

Love.

And...that I'm not drunk off my ass either.


The End

-----

So in closing, thank you to those who read this little story here and sent me a few reviews along the way. I really appreciate that you took the time to!