Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > An Unexpected Birthday Present
Facing the Reality
0 reviewsA fan's golden birthday turns out to be more than she ever imagined when she attends a concert for Panic! At the Disco.
0Unrated
Ryan's POV
Between that point and when I had spoken last, the sensible side of my mind slipped away. I didn't know what newly found emotion had come over me, but the rest of my mind that wasn't sensible or thinking about reality liked it. It made me like it a lot. The feeling came back in a huge wave when she laced her fingers with mine. I could tell that she wanted to close her eyes, as did I, but the dark color of her eyes that mine were staring into willed me to keep them open and stare into their depths for just a bit longer. Every part of my body was telling me to stay like I was for just one more moment...
As she moved her face closer to mine, I leaned in toward her. I didn't even make the decision or not; my body just moved closer on impulse. I was still staring into her eyes when I felt my own begin to close, not even knowing if hers were doing the same or not, although I was getting the feeling that they were. If I hadn't been able to feel her breath before, I certainly was at that moment. It started intermingling with mine, and I sensed her head tilting slightly. Mine followed, again on that same reactive impulse. I could feel the warmth from her face as her lips were about to make contact with mine. All my other senses dropped, bracing my lips for what they were about to feel, when my hand finally vanished from my mind and, while still holding hers, dropped flat out onto the strings of my guitar.
Amanda must have moved her hand from the strings they had been on when I played it for her, because when our hands made contact, there was a loud scratching noise that was sent out through the amp and brought sent my mind crashing down into reality. Eyes open and wide once again, I dropped her hand and realized the position I had gotten myself into. I had nearly kissed someone I hardly knew, let alone a fan of mine. She hadn't noticed the shocked expression on my face yet, as her eyes were pinched shut at the horrible noise from the amp, but I knew that we were both in a bad situation.
Amanda's POV
My heart was racing rapidly in my chest. I felt like if we kissed, I would die. Truly, it would have made me happy to say that I had shared a first kiss with a rock star and an amazing one at that. Everything else washed away in my head, all my other muscles relaxed, getting ready for the kiss that I honestly thought would change my life.
Then, everything got fucked up, and I didn't know why, but I blamed myself. After that awful noise was made from the guitar, it was all ruined like a careless person on a beach unknowingly smashing a sand castle. I didn't think things could get any worse as he dropped my hand and stepped away from me. My eyes closed, holding back tears. It wasn't that he didn't kiss me; it was that I expected him to. I was stupid. I thought it would actually happen. I had let him get the better of me. He probably wasn't even trying to kiss me. But that was what made me confused. I had gotten all the signs from him: when I leaned in, he did too, he had closed his eyes first, and he had gotten so close to me. So it just didn't add up, and it made me want to cry.
It took all of my strength not to let any tears fall from my eyes that moments ago had been so happily looking back into his. I pinched them shut, the rest of my body tensing along with them. My long fingers wrapped around the neck of the guitar that I still held, and the other loosely fell in front of it. I didn't know what to do, so I just stood there, feeling sorry for myself, avoiding his gaze at all costs.
Ryan's POV
My hands shoved deep into my pockets after I backed off of her. Occasionally, I would glance up, staring at the back of her head, wondering what she was thinking. Most of the time, I did most of the thinking while I was staring down at my shoes. I had to keep pushing the thought into my head that she was just a fan, like all the rest, she didn't mean anything to me, and we didn't know each other. She lived in Chicago and I lived in Vegas when I wasn't touring or visiting some place. By the end of the night, she would be going about her normal life without me and I'd keep continuing the chaos that comes along with being in well-known band. It was reality. We both had to face it sooner or later.
That wasn't the only problem that stood between me, Ryan Ross, and this girl I had just met, Amanda:
I had no idea what to tell her.
Between that point and when I had spoken last, the sensible side of my mind slipped away. I didn't know what newly found emotion had come over me, but the rest of my mind that wasn't sensible or thinking about reality liked it. It made me like it a lot. The feeling came back in a huge wave when she laced her fingers with mine. I could tell that she wanted to close her eyes, as did I, but the dark color of her eyes that mine were staring into willed me to keep them open and stare into their depths for just a bit longer. Every part of my body was telling me to stay like I was for just one more moment...
As she moved her face closer to mine, I leaned in toward her. I didn't even make the decision or not; my body just moved closer on impulse. I was still staring into her eyes when I felt my own begin to close, not even knowing if hers were doing the same or not, although I was getting the feeling that they were. If I hadn't been able to feel her breath before, I certainly was at that moment. It started intermingling with mine, and I sensed her head tilting slightly. Mine followed, again on that same reactive impulse. I could feel the warmth from her face as her lips were about to make contact with mine. All my other senses dropped, bracing my lips for what they were about to feel, when my hand finally vanished from my mind and, while still holding hers, dropped flat out onto the strings of my guitar.
Amanda must have moved her hand from the strings they had been on when I played it for her, because when our hands made contact, there was a loud scratching noise that was sent out through the amp and brought sent my mind crashing down into reality. Eyes open and wide once again, I dropped her hand and realized the position I had gotten myself into. I had nearly kissed someone I hardly knew, let alone a fan of mine. She hadn't noticed the shocked expression on my face yet, as her eyes were pinched shut at the horrible noise from the amp, but I knew that we were both in a bad situation.
Amanda's POV
My heart was racing rapidly in my chest. I felt like if we kissed, I would die. Truly, it would have made me happy to say that I had shared a first kiss with a rock star and an amazing one at that. Everything else washed away in my head, all my other muscles relaxed, getting ready for the kiss that I honestly thought would change my life.
Then, everything got fucked up, and I didn't know why, but I blamed myself. After that awful noise was made from the guitar, it was all ruined like a careless person on a beach unknowingly smashing a sand castle. I didn't think things could get any worse as he dropped my hand and stepped away from me. My eyes closed, holding back tears. It wasn't that he didn't kiss me; it was that I expected him to. I was stupid. I thought it would actually happen. I had let him get the better of me. He probably wasn't even trying to kiss me. But that was what made me confused. I had gotten all the signs from him: when I leaned in, he did too, he had closed his eyes first, and he had gotten so close to me. So it just didn't add up, and it made me want to cry.
It took all of my strength not to let any tears fall from my eyes that moments ago had been so happily looking back into his. I pinched them shut, the rest of my body tensing along with them. My long fingers wrapped around the neck of the guitar that I still held, and the other loosely fell in front of it. I didn't know what to do, so I just stood there, feeling sorry for myself, avoiding his gaze at all costs.
Ryan's POV
My hands shoved deep into my pockets after I backed off of her. Occasionally, I would glance up, staring at the back of her head, wondering what she was thinking. Most of the time, I did most of the thinking while I was staring down at my shoes. I had to keep pushing the thought into my head that she was just a fan, like all the rest, she didn't mean anything to me, and we didn't know each other. She lived in Chicago and I lived in Vegas when I wasn't touring or visiting some place. By the end of the night, she would be going about her normal life without me and I'd keep continuing the chaos that comes along with being in well-known band. It was reality. We both had to face it sooner or later.
That wasn't the only problem that stood between me, Ryan Ross, and this girl I had just met, Amanda:
I had no idea what to tell her.
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