Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > Discrepancy
Peter and I were shopping in Wal-Mart in Winnetka. PJ and Courtney had sent us. Don't think my sister changed over the past two days, she was totally hesitant about letting me go to Wal-Mart on my own when PJ said he'd rather stay at my place because of his fear of Mrs Joy Sanders who worked at Wal-Mart six days a week. She was still hesitant when Peter said that he would go with me. She thought I'd end up killing him. Which was a ridiculous assumption because I had never killed anything in my entire save for Courtney's gerbil Mister Gerham (yes, that means Gerbil Ham. It was my idea). I had a hangover and I mistook Mister Gerham for my bowl of porridge. Who knew that animals explode in microwaves?
In the end however, Courtney decided that because Peter was twenty-three he would be responsible enough to keep me from causing chaos and to defend himself so that he would not die (whether it was insanity from my incessant talking and immaturity or my physical actions that were the cause of his death). That was how Peter and I ended up shopping in Wal-Mart together.
And believe me, Peter was almost as immature as I. Perhaps he was just as immature but he was more subtle about it. He was definitely subtle. I decided that he was The Master and my idol for the foreseeable future.
"Ooh, look, apple cookies!" Peter exclaimed. He began running towards these 'apple cookies' and nearly ran over an old lady who was shorter than I, which is quite a feat, in the process.
"Apple what?" I asked in horror.
"Apple cookies!" Peter rolled his eyes at me. He reminded me of a four-year-old child. "Cookies with apple bits in them, duh!"
"How disgusting. We're not buying them."
"But... please?"
"Absolutely not, Peter. I mean, just think about it. Apple cookies probably don't even count as fruit. Or maybe they do... I mean... an apple is still an apple no matter what so technically it is still a fruit no matter what. Does putting the apple in the cookie take away from its fruity value and fruity nutrition? Maybe it makes the cookie more healthy! Or perhaps it makes the apple less healthy..."
Peter was staring at me in a way that clearly showed that he did not understand anything I'd just said.
I rolled my eyes and continued walking.
"Aren't we buying them?" He whined.
"Oh, fine, have it your own way!"
Happily, Peter grabbed several boxes of apple cookies and threw them into the shopping trolley.
As we walked, Peter said to me (and this is where our story really starts), "Charley... you have to be one of the three most interesting people I have ever met. Possibly in the world."
I laughed and shrugged the compliment off, muttering a shy 'thank you' and blushing a great deal because I didn't know what else to do or to say. Maybe I was an interesting person but everyone was interesting to those who knew them. I wouldn't ever go as far to say that I am one of three of the most interesting people in the world. The world is a very large place in terms of population.
And even if I was one of three of the most interesting people that Peter had ever met, why wasn't I the most interesting of the three most interesting people that Peter had ever met? Was I not interesting enough to be the most interesting person that Peter had ever met? Perhaps I was not interesting at all but Peter had simply paid me that compliment because he thought that I was not in the least bit interesting but that he ought to compliment me on something that I evidently lacked, thinking that I was thinking about how non-interesting I was and possibly feeling slightly sad about that fact that I was not interesting despite that every other human being was unique and therefore interesting.
And despite that I had a fully-fledged theory formed in my brain, I decided that it was not the one I wanted and I simply decided that Peter knew so many people that, although I was extremely interesting, he knew one or two people who might've been more funny than I. That theory was so much more pleasing.
"Peter... you are the most subtly immature people I have ever met and for that I revere you," I returned the compliment. "In fact, you are The Master. I would get on my knees and beg you to teach me all that you know but the floor here is dirty and these jeans are new."
Without warning, though I guess that people don't normally give notice before they do what Peter did to me except in extremely clichéd films, Peter let go of the shopping trolley, grabbed my waist and pressed his lips against mine. I didn't mind all that much because he was rather good looking but I was quite alarmed.
Perhaps we would've continued to kiss passionately in aisle 27 had it not been for the elderly woman who walked past, clicked her tongue irritably and muttered, "Public displays of affection everywhere... next they'll be having sex in the checkout queues."
Blushing almost as much as I was, Peter pulled away. He grinned shyly at me. I suddenly had the strange feeling that he was the one I had had sex with but I said nothing because he might've been offended if he knew that I failed to remember having sex with him.
"Sorry... I didn't mean to do that..."
"Oh, it's okay," I waved a hand dismissively, "I get that all the time. Though you should know that I don't particularly mind that you kissed me; you're a rather good kisser and quite attractive and I really think that -"
Then he kissed me again.
"Shit. Shit. Shit." He walked away from me with his hands stuffed in his pockets and his head held low.
I was sort of in shock and did nothing to stop him. I simply carried on shopping and by the time I finished shopping and got to the front of the shop and paid for all my items, he was nowhere to be seen.
He wasn't even in my car when I got outside with my many shopping bags. I assumed that he had found another way to get back to my apartment and drove home. He was there when I arrived. And although he helped me carry in the many plastic bags that I had loaded into the back of the car, he said nothing to me and then left soon afterwards.
"Joseph," I said later on to Joe on the phone. I was not sure whether or not to act on my intense attraction to Peter and call Joe. He would know whether or not it was a good idea. Jeffers said that he and Peter were 'real good friends'. She could've been being sarcastic. Hopefully not.
"Yeah?" I assumed that Joe had been sleeping. I didn't blame him; after all, it was three in the morning.
"You know Peter?"
"Mhm... the only one of my band mates that you've spent more than fourteen minutes with."
"You know I had sex with him...?"
"Well, yes, but I wouldn't go around telling everyone that you did. I mean, you guys were pissed out of your minds and on a sugar high. His girlfriend would totally have a spack attack."
"Girlfriend?" I damn near choked.
"Yes. Is there anything meaningful you wanted to tell me at three in the morning?" Joe sounded more awake now and more irritated.
"No... not anymore anyway, goodnight Joe," I hung up before I could listen to Joe's protests and angry mutterings that I had wasted his sleep.
Author's Note: Did you like that chapter? I hope so. Well now that you've done one of the three Rs, do the other two. Yes, that means... rate and review!!! YES!!!!
You know you want to.
In the end however, Courtney decided that because Peter was twenty-three he would be responsible enough to keep me from causing chaos and to defend himself so that he would not die (whether it was insanity from my incessant talking and immaturity or my physical actions that were the cause of his death). That was how Peter and I ended up shopping in Wal-Mart together.
And believe me, Peter was almost as immature as I. Perhaps he was just as immature but he was more subtle about it. He was definitely subtle. I decided that he was The Master and my idol for the foreseeable future.
"Ooh, look, apple cookies!" Peter exclaimed. He began running towards these 'apple cookies' and nearly ran over an old lady who was shorter than I, which is quite a feat, in the process.
"Apple what?" I asked in horror.
"Apple cookies!" Peter rolled his eyes at me. He reminded me of a four-year-old child. "Cookies with apple bits in them, duh!"
"How disgusting. We're not buying them."
"But... please?"
"Absolutely not, Peter. I mean, just think about it. Apple cookies probably don't even count as fruit. Or maybe they do... I mean... an apple is still an apple no matter what so technically it is still a fruit no matter what. Does putting the apple in the cookie take away from its fruity value and fruity nutrition? Maybe it makes the cookie more healthy! Or perhaps it makes the apple less healthy..."
Peter was staring at me in a way that clearly showed that he did not understand anything I'd just said.
I rolled my eyes and continued walking.
"Aren't we buying them?" He whined.
"Oh, fine, have it your own way!"
Happily, Peter grabbed several boxes of apple cookies and threw them into the shopping trolley.
As we walked, Peter said to me (and this is where our story really starts), "Charley... you have to be one of the three most interesting people I have ever met. Possibly in the world."
I laughed and shrugged the compliment off, muttering a shy 'thank you' and blushing a great deal because I didn't know what else to do or to say. Maybe I was an interesting person but everyone was interesting to those who knew them. I wouldn't ever go as far to say that I am one of three of the most interesting people in the world. The world is a very large place in terms of population.
And even if I was one of three of the most interesting people that Peter had ever met, why wasn't I the most interesting of the three most interesting people that Peter had ever met? Was I not interesting enough to be the most interesting person that Peter had ever met? Perhaps I was not interesting at all but Peter had simply paid me that compliment because he thought that I was not in the least bit interesting but that he ought to compliment me on something that I evidently lacked, thinking that I was thinking about how non-interesting I was and possibly feeling slightly sad about that fact that I was not interesting despite that every other human being was unique and therefore interesting.
And despite that I had a fully-fledged theory formed in my brain, I decided that it was not the one I wanted and I simply decided that Peter knew so many people that, although I was extremely interesting, he knew one or two people who might've been more funny than I. That theory was so much more pleasing.
"Peter... you are the most subtly immature people I have ever met and for that I revere you," I returned the compliment. "In fact, you are The Master. I would get on my knees and beg you to teach me all that you know but the floor here is dirty and these jeans are new."
Without warning, though I guess that people don't normally give notice before they do what Peter did to me except in extremely clichéd films, Peter let go of the shopping trolley, grabbed my waist and pressed his lips against mine. I didn't mind all that much because he was rather good looking but I was quite alarmed.
Perhaps we would've continued to kiss passionately in aisle 27 had it not been for the elderly woman who walked past, clicked her tongue irritably and muttered, "Public displays of affection everywhere... next they'll be having sex in the checkout queues."
Blushing almost as much as I was, Peter pulled away. He grinned shyly at me. I suddenly had the strange feeling that he was the one I had had sex with but I said nothing because he might've been offended if he knew that I failed to remember having sex with him.
"Sorry... I didn't mean to do that..."
"Oh, it's okay," I waved a hand dismissively, "I get that all the time. Though you should know that I don't particularly mind that you kissed me; you're a rather good kisser and quite attractive and I really think that -"
Then he kissed me again.
"Shit. Shit. Shit." He walked away from me with his hands stuffed in his pockets and his head held low.
I was sort of in shock and did nothing to stop him. I simply carried on shopping and by the time I finished shopping and got to the front of the shop and paid for all my items, he was nowhere to be seen.
He wasn't even in my car when I got outside with my many shopping bags. I assumed that he had found another way to get back to my apartment and drove home. He was there when I arrived. And although he helped me carry in the many plastic bags that I had loaded into the back of the car, he said nothing to me and then left soon afterwards.
"Joseph," I said later on to Joe on the phone. I was not sure whether or not to act on my intense attraction to Peter and call Joe. He would know whether or not it was a good idea. Jeffers said that he and Peter were 'real good friends'. She could've been being sarcastic. Hopefully not.
"Yeah?" I assumed that Joe had been sleeping. I didn't blame him; after all, it was three in the morning.
"You know Peter?"
"Mhm... the only one of my band mates that you've spent more than fourteen minutes with."
"You know I had sex with him...?"
"Well, yes, but I wouldn't go around telling everyone that you did. I mean, you guys were pissed out of your minds and on a sugar high. His girlfriend would totally have a spack attack."
"Girlfriend?" I damn near choked.
"Yes. Is there anything meaningful you wanted to tell me at three in the morning?" Joe sounded more awake now and more irritated.
"No... not anymore anyway, goodnight Joe," I hung up before I could listen to Joe's protests and angry mutterings that I had wasted his sleep.
Author's Note: Did you like that chapter? I hope so. Well now that you've done one of the three Rs, do the other two. Yes, that means... rate and review!!! YES!!!!
You know you want to.
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