Categories > Anime/Manga > Inuyasha > Alphabet Soup

"N" is for Nothing

by kirayasha 0 reviews

Category: Inuyasha - Rating: G - Genres: Humor - Characters: Bankotsu,Jakotsu - Published: 2007-08-23 - Updated: 2007-08-23 - 1411 words - Complete

Alphabet Soup

By kira

Author’s note: The following is a series of Jakotsu-centric challenge fics written from a list my dear friend and writing partner, Vega-chan, came up with for me. It’s is based on Killa Kay’s awesome collection of Gravitation short stories called “A to Z.” (You can find them in my favorite stories section.) Due to the nature of the word given, they can either be what I call “canon timeline” which is set before their first deaths or AU which is set in modern times and will be set in the “world” I created in my story, “Homecoming.”

FYI: Jakotsu uses the word “hermadingle” when he meant to say hermaphrodite. That line is a reference to my fic, “Knocked up Joke,” in which he had pretended to be pregnant...

“N” is for Nothing

Jakotsu sighed for the umpteenth time.

“What’s wrong, Sweetness?”

“Nothing...” The cross-dresser sighed again.

“It can’t be ‘nothing,’ Jak. You’ve been sighing ever since we left that village,” Renkotsu said testily as the cross-dresser’s sighs were getting on his nerves.

Bankotsu nodded.

“You’re not sick or injured, are you?” Suikotsu asked.

“No... I’m just tired,” Jakotsu said simply as if that explained everything.

“Well if you didn’t stay up half the night nookying, you wouldn’t be tired,” the fire-breather pointed out.

Suikotsu hissed at him to watch his mouth.

Bankotsu glared at him and added his own long suffering sigh to the cross-dresser’s soft ones. “You want to rest under those trees for a bit, Sweetness?”

“Only if you want to, Aniki-chan.”

“Good, cuz I feel like stopping,” Bankotsu said as he led his paramour to the shade of some maple trees that lined the road they were traveling on.

Jakotsu sat down, and leaning back against the tree, he closed his eyes and sighed contentedly.

Renkotsu took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “You did it again, Jak.”

“Did what?”


“You really did, Sweetness,” Bankotsu said when the cross-dresser cracked open an eye and looked at him.


“Are you sure nothing’s bothering you?”

“Yeah. I’m just... I don’t know, happy.” Jakotsu smiled sweetly.

“Oh sweet Kami-sama, please tell me you’re not really with child this time,” Renkotsu said as he rubbed tiredly at his throbbing temples. “Because if you are, I’m going to go blow something up,” he said wryly.

Jakotsu rolled his eyes and heaved a long suffering sigh. “I’m not a hermadingle, Ren! Don’t you know anything?”

“Well, you are acting like a woman in that condition, Jak,” Suikotsu said, his eyes twinkling with amusement.

“Well, I’m not even though Aniki-chan’s been nookying with me every night,” the cross-dresser said as he grabbed his lover’s hand.

Bankotsu grinned. “What can I say?”

“Uh, nothing,” Renkotsu said dryly.

“So if you’re not with child, what are you so happy about?”

“Nothing...” Jakotsu said airily. “I’m just happy.”

“Then I guess we have nothing to worry about, eh?” Suikotsu asked.

“Yeah...” Jakotsu smiled.

“Well, I’m happy you’re happy, Sweetness.”

“Me too.” The cross-dresser sighed as he leaned on his lover.

“You still haven’t explained why you keep sighing, Jak,” Renkotsu pointed out.

“I said it was nothing.”

“But nobody sighs over nothing.”

“They don’t...?”

“Nope,” the fire-breather said testily.

“Oh. I guess I’m nobody then,” Jakotsu teased.

Renkotsu felt his left eyebrow start to twitch in time with the vein that was throbbing in his temple.

Jakotsu watched, fascinated, as the fire-breather’s eyebrow continued its twitching. “What’s wrong, Ren?”


“You sure?” Jakotsu asked sweetly.


“Okay, okay. Ummm...” He stared intently at the fire-breather. “You know your eyebrow’s twitching.”

“Yes...” the fire-breather said slowly. He wanted nothing more than to throttle the cross-dresser at that moment, but he restrained himself when he felt Bankotsu staring at him. “I don’t know why it’s doing that.”


“It’s okay, Jak, no one’s died from a twitch before,” Suikotsu soothed.

The cross-dresser nodded and let out another sigh.

Both Suikotsu and Bankotsu were hard pressed not to laugh at the fire-breather’s murderous expression.

“Calm down, Ren, it’s nothing,” Suikotsu said softly. “I think he either can’t help it, or he’s doing it to annoy you.”

“I think ‘annoy me’ is more like it.”

“Then if you act like it’s nothing, maybe he’ll stop,” the claw bearer said.

“I’m trying to,” Renkotsu hissed. “But he makes it damned hard to ignore.”

Jakotsu sighed again when his lover gently tilted his face up to look at him. “Stop it, Sweetness, before Ren explodes.”


“As much fun as it is watching him get upset over nothing, you really should stop. I’d hate to have to kill him or something.” Bankotsu grinned.

Jakotsu smiled back. “Yeah... If you did, then I’d have nothing left to tease, hunh?”


They laughed much to Renkotsu’s annoyance.

“There’s nothing to get upset about, Ren,” Suikotsu soothed as he watched their leader and his paramour talking quietly amongst themselves. “I have the feeling Jak’s just teasing you and Oo-Aniki’s going along with him. It was a tough mission for the just four of us and they’re just trying to forget about it by playing with you.”

“Nothing to get upset about?” Renkotsu looked at the claw-bearer like he had three heads.

“I know no one likes being teased, but they’re still boys, Ren, and it means nothing more to them than any other silly thing they do to pass the time when they’re tired and bored.”

“It still doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

“True... but I really wouldn’t take it to heart. Besides, he’ll give it up especially if you stop making a big deal out of it. Remember it’s nothing but two boys acting like boys.”

Renkotsu nodded. “I suppose it’s better than them acting like rabbits.”

“Exactly. That’s the spirit, Ren!” Suikotsu patted him on the back.

The fire-breather grinned.

“What are you so happy about, Ren?” Jakotsu asked.

“Nothing,” he smirked.

“Nothing...?” The cross-dresser blinked.

“Yeah, ‘nothing.’ There’s nothing funny, Jak, so don’t worry about it.” Renkotsu chuckled.

“It can’t be ‘nothing’ if you’re still laughing about it,” the cross-dresser whined.

“Good move, Ren,” Suikotsu said softly.

“Thanks. I figure it’s about time they get a taste of what it feels like to be on the receiving end of their little games,” he said just as softly in reply.

The four of them lapsed into silence that was broken by Jakotsu’s occasional sighing. Every time he did so, Renkotsu would exchange glances with Suikotsu, before turning back towards the cross-dresser, a big fat grin plastered on his face. Jakotsu, annoyed that his little game was not turning out as he had expected, sighed loudly.

“Ssh... I think Ren’s up to something, Sweetness, or it could really be nothing. So don’t worry about it,” Bankotsu soothed.

“But it’s so annoying,” he whined. When Bankotsu shrugged in reply, Jakotsu shoved his hands in his sleeves and looked away, pouting.

“Come on, Sweetness, it’s nothing to get upset over. Ren’s just being a pain in the ass as usual,” Bankotsu said softly. “Sweetness...?” he reached out and gently turned his paramour’s face to look at him. “Come; we’re going.”


“Yeah I had enough sitting around here doing nothing.” Bankotsu smiled. “Besides, the quicker we get moving, the quicker we’ll get to the next village...” He winked suggestively.

Jakotsu giggled. “The quicker we can nookie!”


Jakotsu let out a happy sigh as they stood up to leave.

“Now what’s wrong?” Renkotsu asked, although he was afraid of the answer.

“Nothing,” Jakotsu said airily. “Aniki-chan said it was time to go.”


“Yeah...” the cross-dresser grinned.

Bankotsu bent and hoisted the Banryuu onto his shoulder. “Let’s go,” he said and grabbing his paramour’s hand they started walking towards the road.

Suikotsu helped the fire-breather up. “See, I told you it was nothing,” he deadpanned, although his eyes twinkled with amusement.

“Yeah...” Renkotsu said dryly as they hurried off after the others.


Author’s end note: Next up is “O” is for Opposite.
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