Categories > Original > Humor
Die-arrhea
0 reviewsWhen the lunch-lady serves her own special,the high school gets even higher,and Martha Stewart eats J.Lo.
0Unrated
It was a fine day at Janet Abdul High,and it was lunch-time.
Christa Langhininnie and her girlfriend Beatty LaHgdgzudadzgfusgzkgfzuk were very disappointed when they heard the lunch-lady was serving something of her own.Why?
"Because,last time that happened,everybody go constipated." expalined Christa.
"Ugh,I remember.I was sitting on the toilet for 13 hours,doing nothing but reading my dad's Sports Illustrated,at least until my granny went in and shoved the poo out of my butt with her fake teeth." said Beatty.
"Eew.Last time was pizza with cockroach sauce,and now...PEAS AND COW LIVER CASTAREL?!" Christa exclaimed.
Everybody sat on their tables,with gloom in their faces.
"Enjoy,kiddies!MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" said the lunch-lady.
35 minutes later,everybody managed to eat their castarel.Christa and Beatty went to Biology class with Miss Underfont,whom everybody knew was a transexual.
But,the ramblings oh the sexual life of the Mediterranean plancton,were inturrapted,as one student put his hand up.
"Um,Miss Underfont,can I go to the bathroom?"
"Yeah,me too?"
"And me?"
"And me,too?"
"Yes,yesyou may all go...holy shit,now I have to go!" exclaiimed Miss Underfont.
Soon the entire classroom was empty,as everybody rushed to the bathroom.Christa and Beatty saw other students and teachers rushing to the bathrooms.
"It must be that freakin' castarel!" said Beatty.
The first one who got to the toilet was Cindy Godddess,the slutty cheerleader.She put her panties down,and started pooping.Cindy felt a horrible sensation in her hiney,as the poo went on and on,until tiny bits started falling down.Cindy felt them as sharp pieces,and decided to put all her effort into pooping the entire poo.The result was terrible,a huge gush of poo rained on the toilet,anf on the floor,as cindy wailed.
"Help me!For the love of bad fiction,somebody help me!!"
Soon the pain in Cindy's butt groove stronger,and Cuindy started defecating blood,until her whole ass exploded leaving her body face down to the red'n'brown floor.
The people outside the cabin rushed in,but it was too late,they filled thier pants with ounces of poo.The smell was unbearable,and some started vomiting on each other.
Christa and Beatty decided to hold down their fecal matter,and look for another bathroom.
As they got out to the hallway,they saw a horrible scene:everybody was running around,some fell and filled their pants,and some decided to shit on the walls.
"Diarrhea!We all have diarrhea!" screeched Christa,and looked in shock as her girlriend fell on the floor,and done "the deed".
"Beatty,nooooooooooo!!!"
Christa rushed to the cafeteria,but couldn't take much longer,and pooped her panties,which soon became blod.
"I've had with this goddamn poo in this goddamn school..." she whispered and fell on the floor,until someone else pooped on her head.
The entire situation was monitored by the lunch-lady,who said:
"Oh,well,too bad!Guess I'll have to make it without dog-food anymore!"
THE END
P.S.
As for the "Martha Stewart eats J.Lo" bit...I lied.
Christa Langhininnie and her girlfriend Beatty LaHgdgzudadzgfusgzkgfzuk were very disappointed when they heard the lunch-lady was serving something of her own.Why?
"Because,last time that happened,everybody go constipated." expalined Christa.
"Ugh,I remember.I was sitting on the toilet for 13 hours,doing nothing but reading my dad's Sports Illustrated,at least until my granny went in and shoved the poo out of my butt with her fake teeth." said Beatty.
"Eew.Last time was pizza with cockroach sauce,and now...PEAS AND COW LIVER CASTAREL?!" Christa exclaimed.
Everybody sat on their tables,with gloom in their faces.
"Enjoy,kiddies!MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" said the lunch-lady.
35 minutes later,everybody managed to eat their castarel.Christa and Beatty went to Biology class with Miss Underfont,whom everybody knew was a transexual.
But,the ramblings oh the sexual life of the Mediterranean plancton,were inturrapted,as one student put his hand up.
"Um,Miss Underfont,can I go to the bathroom?"
"Yeah,me too?"
"And me?"
"And me,too?"
"Yes,yesyou may all go...holy shit,now I have to go!" exclaiimed Miss Underfont.
Soon the entire classroom was empty,as everybody rushed to the bathroom.Christa and Beatty saw other students and teachers rushing to the bathrooms.
"It must be that freakin' castarel!" said Beatty.
The first one who got to the toilet was Cindy Godddess,the slutty cheerleader.She put her panties down,and started pooping.Cindy felt a horrible sensation in her hiney,as the poo went on and on,until tiny bits started falling down.Cindy felt them as sharp pieces,and decided to put all her effort into pooping the entire poo.The result was terrible,a huge gush of poo rained on the toilet,anf on the floor,as cindy wailed.
"Help me!For the love of bad fiction,somebody help me!!"
Soon the pain in Cindy's butt groove stronger,and Cuindy started defecating blood,until her whole ass exploded leaving her body face down to the red'n'brown floor.
The people outside the cabin rushed in,but it was too late,they filled thier pants with ounces of poo.The smell was unbearable,and some started vomiting on each other.
Christa and Beatty decided to hold down their fecal matter,and look for another bathroom.
As they got out to the hallway,they saw a horrible scene:everybody was running around,some fell and filled their pants,and some decided to shit on the walls.
"Diarrhea!We all have diarrhea!" screeched Christa,and looked in shock as her girlriend fell on the floor,and done "the deed".
"Beatty,nooooooooooo!!!"
Christa rushed to the cafeteria,but couldn't take much longer,and pooped her panties,which soon became blod.
"I've had with this goddamn poo in this goddamn school..." she whispered and fell on the floor,until someone else pooped on her head.
The entire situation was monitored by the lunch-lady,who said:
"Oh,well,too bad!Guess I'll have to make it without dog-food anymore!"
THE END
P.S.
As for the "Martha Stewart eats J.Lo" bit...I lied.
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