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At the party people were walking, dancing, and chatting this way and that as Percefany's eyes fell on a boy by the punch bowl and she swooned.

April(Pouring punch in a cup for the boy) Who are you staring at?

Boy(Pointing to Percefany) The birthday girl, she seems to like staring at me back.

April(Leaving her station) You boys are so clueless, do I have to do everything in her life?

Mr. Mittens: Here comes the animal abuser, act natural panty boy.

Shadow(Panting) I'll- try.

April: Hey sis happy birthday, you see that boy over there?

Percefany(Sighing) Joshua Andrews he's soooooooo cute.

April: Well he notices you staring at him, and he's staring back at you.

Percefany(Messing with her makeup and hair) Did he tell you he noticed me looking at him?

April: I wouldn't be here if he didn't, now act natural, try not to act nerdy, and above all act girlish.

Percefany: Girlish?

April: I expected that kind of comment from Jake, Jorge, Clinton, or even daddy, but not from you.

Percefany: What makes a girl girlish?

April: Ughhhhhh do I have to do everything for you, flirt with him, use your girl senses, and show a little more skin girl.

Percefany: How much more.

April: I'll be right back, you just get skimpier clothes, the kind of clothes daddy would never let you wear out of the house.

April skipped off to find Natalie serving chips and other snacks to the kids.

April(Pulling at her elbow) Come on Nat, you have to help me find Percefany's inner skimpy girl.

Natalie(Pretending to cry) I've waited so long for this day.

April and Natalie pounded up the stairs as they reached Percefany's door to find her in the closet.

Percefany(Throwing clothes everywhere) No, too long, too three years ago, too last year, ughhhhhhh where are all my skimpy clothes.

Natalie(Pulling Percefany to her bed) Sit down before you hurt yourself, let us do the work for you.

April: Code blue I'm thinking?

Natalie: Better make it code red, who's crushing on her?

Percefany(Smiling) The soccer captain, he's sooooooo cute, in a dark, mysterious, Criss Angely sort of way.

Natalie: Definitely code red, and hurry it up the parental units are going to malfunction if they see us up here.

April dashed out of Percefany's room as Natalie sat next to Percefany smiling.

Natalie: So tell me about this Criss Angel, Soccer captain.

Percefany: Well he transferred here earlier this year and I was head over heels since then.

Natalie: Have you ever carried on a conversation with him?

Percefany: Once we talked about My Chemical Romance for like five hours.

Natalie: Is he the reason you joined the soccer team?

Percefany(Blushing) Yes but mom and dad don't have to know that.

April(Throwing clothes on Percefany's bed) You can pick or chose how much cleavage you want showing.

Percefany(Nervous) Are you sure this is going to work?

April: It can't fail, Natalie's rule #1 never and I mean never underwstimate the power of cleavage.

Percefany(Holding up a halter top) And the point of this shirt would be?

Natalie: To show off more of your lower region, like your cute tummy.

April: Not to mention your chest, this shirt is designed to show off your goodies.

Percefany: I'll take it now for the pants.

Natalie: Hiphuggers go great with halter tops, but then again so do cargo pants.

Percefany: I have sparkly hiphuggers, would they do good?

Natalie: Perfect Percef I think your learning, now for the bra color.

Percefany: That matters?

Natalie: Yes if you wear white your too plain, if you wear black your too easy, you need a color that screams come away with me.

April: Red's pretty, let's go with red.

Natalie: I agree with the little munchkin red's very show offy.

Percefany(Gathering the clothes) And who do I return ther halter top to?

Natalie: Me but you don't have to hurry about it, I want you to look cute for this boy, I'll take you clothes shopping tomorrow if you want.

Meanwhile downstairs Eliza is checking her clipboard and looking for Natalie and April who aren't in their spots.

April(Running up to the punch table) Pressent and accounted for momisita.

Eliza: Where were you young lady?

April: Fashion emergancy, Percefany asked for Natalie and my expertise on what she should wear to impress a boy.

Eliza: She better not look like a clown young lady.

April: Mommy this is Natalie and I we're talking about, we wouldn't make our sister look like a fool.

Eliza: All right next time don't leave the post without telling me.

When Percefany came down the stairs all eyes were on her as Eliza just shook her head and John ran at the stairwell.

John: What in the world are you wearing?

Percefany: Clothes what else would I wear bananna leaves?

John: They'd cover up more, what the hell is that cloth your wearing?

Percefany: I told you it's clothes, now if you'll excuse me I have a cute tummy and red bra straps to show off.

John: Not dressed like that your not, get up there and change into something deccent.

Percefany(Walking past him) I have a boyfriend to get, if you'll excuse me.

John: I can show my true colors too, I can whip out the baby pictures if you like, you know the ones.

Percefany: Rule number one in the girl world dad, Never call a girl's bluff but they can call yours.

Joshua: Hey birthday girl what's real?

Percefany: Nothing much, you know a little of this and a little of that.

Natalie: She sooooooo played that like a pro.

April(Coughing into her hand) Ask him about himself.

Percefany: So did you get My Chemical Romance's Welcome To The Black Parade yet?

Josh: Are you kidding I was the first one in line to get it, I camped out for like five days before it came out.

John: Who wants to see Percefany's baby pictures?

Josh: I love the whole CD what about you?

Percefany: Yea I do too, but if I had to pick one song I'd play on my MP3 player it'd be Teenagers, it's so brutally honest.

John(Grabbing a baby book) I have them right here, hot off the presses baby pictures of cute, little, Percefany.

Percefany: He's bluffing he'd never do that.

Josh: So do you want to go outside and talk or something.

April: Hey ladies and gents I say we play spin the bottle.

Josh(Blushing) Or we could play spin the bottle.

Eliza(Grabbing the book from John) Excuse us kids and kidettes, my husband needs a reality check.

Mr. Mittens: What is spin the bottle, and why are you playing it?

Shadow: It sounds fun, I mean they spin a bottle and you chase bottle caps so what's the difference?

When John and Eliza were out of hearing and seeing distance Eliza stared angrily into John's eyes.

Eliza(Imitating John) I have them right here, hot off the presses baby pictures of cute, little, Percefany, are you insane?

John: Did you see the way she was dressed, she looks like Jessica Rabbit.

Eliza: She looks like a woman, and she should because soon she'll be one.

John: She should be wearing more than what she has on right now.

Eliza: She's flirting sweetie, it's what girls do to boys, they flirt like there's no tomorrow.

John: And she can't flirt wearing deccent clothes.

Eliza(Shaking her head laughing) John, John, John flirting and skimpy clothes go together like bacon and eggs.

John: Well maybe I don't like her flirting anymore.

Eliza: It's inevitable, she's out there talking to something without fur, paws, claws, and a tail.

John: I preffer her to animal talk, this boy she's talking to looks like a killer in training.

Eliza: She's going to blossom into a young lady John, whether or not your ready for it yet.
John: I'm not saying I'm not ready for it yet, but can't she just talk to a shy guy.

Eliza: She knows you'd like it sweetie, she wants to flirt with danger because she sees that he scares you.

John: This is great, I have one daughter with blue hair, and another dating a guy probably nicknamed Snake.

Eliza(Walking off) Now I don't know about you but I'm going back to the party to watch our little girl play spin the bottle.

John followed Eliza into the living room where a group of kids and two animals were watching a bottle spin across the table.

Shadow: This is boring, what's the point of spinning a bottle across the table?

Mr. Mittens: Maybe there's a prize for whoever spins it longest.

Percefany watched excitedly as the bottle landed on Josh and she could feel her face growing hot.

Party guests: Oooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Percefany leaned in as Josh met her halfway and they kissed as Mr. Mittens and Shadow looked up at her.

Shadow: Boy that's some prize, why is she kissing him?

Mr. Mittens: Maybe he's choking and she's giving him mouth to mouth.

Shadow: Isn't he supposed to be standing up for that.

Eliza: You two knuckleheads their kissing because it's the point of the game.

Mr. Mittens: What kind of a weird game let's you spin a bottle and kiss a boy?

Shadow: Teenagers you'll never understand them.

Eliza: She's eleven which makes her a pre teen.

Shadow: She's acting like a teenager.

Eliza(Grabbing a leash and picking Mr. Mittens up) I think you party animals shoud be put up for awhile.

John: And where are you taking them?

Eliza: To their room, or should I say to Percefany's room.

Shadow: And my new room.

Josh and Percefany slowly broke apart as the guests looked at them smiling.

Percefany(Handing the bottle to Natalie) Your up next, I'm going to give Josh a tour of the house.

John: Just leave your room out of that tour.

Percefany: Maybe I will and maybe I won't, we'll see what happens.

John(Chasing her upstairs) I have years of embarassing moments to share with your boyfriend.

Percefany(Scared) Like what?

John: She didn't stop wetting the bed until she was nine, she like peanut butter and banana sandwitches, and she's petrified of the dark.

Percefany(Crying) I am not, don't listen to him.

John: She still sleeps with a nightlight and has me check for the closet monster, plus she hogs the bathroom with every chance she gets.

Josh: Uhhhhhhh maybe I should go, great party Cef, I'll see you at practice Monday?

Percefany(Running off) If I don't die of embarassment before then.

John(Yelling after her) I haven't even touched the surface yet little girl.

Josh: I gotta bounce, it's been nice meeting you Mr. Thornberry.

John(Smiling) Likewise and I hope never to see you again.

Josh: Ohh you will, it'll take more than your dirty tactics to get rid of me.

John: I don't think you'll be invited here ever again.

Josh laughed and walked out as John wore a worried look.

John: What did he mean by dirty tactics, and I'd be seeing him again.

Percefany stormed into her room as Eliza was getting Shadow settled and plopped onto her bed angrily as Mr. Mittens backed up fast and fell from the bed.

Eliza(Sitting next to Percefany) Percef what's wrong?, did one of the kids upset you?

Percefany(Bawling) Take another stab at it mom, and it's in the form of the man you married.

Eliza: What did John do baby?

Percefany(Bolting up and staring at Eliza) He gave away all of my little secrets to Josh, He's going to think I'm such a geek sqaured now.

Eliza: What did he tell Josh?

Percefany: What didn't he tell them, and the answer to that is nothing.

Eliza: The bed wetting until you were nine.

Percefany(Crying) Uh huh and my love for peanut butter and banana sandwitches, plus my fear of the closet monster and the dark.

Eliza: And lastly the whole hogging the bathroom thing.

Percefany could only nod as she fell into Eliza's arms and she stroked her hair.

John(Singing) happy no boyfriend to her, happy no boyfriend to her, happy no boyfriend to herrrrrrrrr happy no boyfriend to her, and many more.

Eliza: And no more sleeping next to me in the bed, until you figure out a way to help our daughter's shattered soul.

John: Your kidding right?, I mean Elize baby you know what being away from you does to me.

Eliza: I also know what the couch does to your back, and until our daughter is done wallowing in her sorrow, consider it your new bed.

John: She was going to give him a tour of the house Eliza, meaning them alone in her room.

Eliza: You have got to have more trust in her John, now excuse me but parents are arriving and I'm going to see the kids out.

Shadow(Playfully sniffing Percefany's face) Come on girl, I mean I admit the boy left but who cares?

Percefany(Rolling over to her phone) I'm calling him so keep the yapping to a minimum.

What happens when Percefany get's even with John read part 4 Thornberry VS. Thornberry and reply to part 3