FicWad

((Gerard's P.O.V.))

Frank and Bob thought I was asleep when they left their bunk this morning.

Mikey and Ray were, but whenever I know Bob and Frank are alone together, I make it my business to stay awake and make sure I'm up and ready for anything if Bob does something to hurt Frank, which I know he will.

He always does.

I hear them arguing and I I hear a plate smashing into a million little pieces.

I grip my bedsheets tightly to keep from jumping out of my bunk right now and going into the kitchen area to kill Bob.

But Frank made me promise to never get involved. Because if I got involved, he said, Bob would surely hurt me, too. Frank didn't want both of us getting hurt. And as much as it kills me to keep this promise, I know that whatever Frank wants, Frank gets.

As soon as I hear the door to the bus open and shut I jump out of my bunk. I know it's Bob that left; Frank would never walk out on Bob. He loves him so much; maybe too much for his own good.

I run towards the kitchen area and see Frank curled up in a ball against the refrigerator, crying. There's blood and broken pieces of a glass plate on the floor. I run up to Frank, still wearing my skeleton pajamas, and wrap him in my arms as he sobs into my chest.

“Oh Frank,” I say, rocking him back and forth slightly. “Why do you let him do this to you?”

“He doesn't mean it,” Frank tells me. “He only does it because he loves me.”

I sigh as I wet a towel with cold water and press it into his lip to stop the bleeding. “Then for your sake, Frankie, I hope he doesn't love you tomorrow.”

“Don't you dare say that,”he says, putting his fingers to my lips. Just his touch sends shivers down my spine. I'm tempted to tell him how I feel about him right here, right now. But I can't do that to him.

We begin cleaning up the glass and such. About an hour later, we're still trying to scrub blood stains off the floor when Bob comes marching back in, like nothing happened. He gives Frank and I a quick glance and sits down on the couch in the living room area, turning on the TV. I hear Frank sniffle and look over to see new tears on his face. I give him a quick nod and he runs to the bunk area, cupping his face in his hands and sobbing quietly. I begin to wonder how Mikey and Ray will react to him when I catch sight of Bob again.

Although he can't see it, I give him a look of disgust as I pick up one last piece of glass. He makes me so angry that I don't even realize that I've gripped the glass so hard that it's now cutting my hand. I look at my bloody hand and back at Bob, using all the strength I possibly have to keep my promise to Frank, to not break his heart by taking this glass and pressing it hard into Bob's throat while I tell him everything I think when I look at him.

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((What Gerard Thinks When He Looks At Bob))

Damn you, Bob.

You're such a stupid son of a bitch. Frank doesn't deserve any of the shit you give him. He doesn't deserve your beatings. You don't deserve him.

Frank deserves someone like me.

That's right, bitch. ME. Frank deserves someone that's gonna treat him like they really give a shit. Not you. ME.

See, here's how things usually go:

YOU forget something important like his birthday.

FRANK cries hysterically, thinking you don't care about him. Not that you do.

I have to pick up all his broken pieces.

YOU go clubbing with all of us, pick up some random dude, and go back to his place to fuck his brains out.

FRANK, your boyfriend of THREE FUCKING YEARS, stays up waiting for you until he can't keep his eyes open anymore and he feels asleep on the couch, crying.

I stay up with him the entire night, trying to convince both him and myself that you're not doing what we both know you are, and wait for him to cry himself to sleep in MY arms.

YOU beat the shit out of him for no reason at all.

FRANK stays bleeding, sometimes unconscious on the floor of whatever room you left him in.

I find him and clean up the mess you made of him, wiping away his blood and tears and trying my best to heal him, both inside and out.

And yet, every night, when all is said and done, Frank goes running back into your arms, forgiving all the shit you do to him.

You are so lucky he's so forgiving.

You are so lucky he loves you so much.

You are so lucky I'm in love with him and keep my promises to him.

Otherwise, Robert Cory Bryar, you would be dead.