FicWad

At first Patrick wasn’t too keen on the idea of letting me discharge myself considering I was still going cold turkey and the beautiful meds, courtesy of the hospital, were now wearing off. Patrick also wasn’t too keen on letting me drive, but considering he couldn’t drive himself, it seemed the only option. Well, would’ve been the only option, if I didn’t remember by the hospital entrance that I was brought there via ambulance and my car was still parked outside my house.

So, we walked. It was a good walk. A couple of miles. We occupied ourselves by telling each other stupid jokes. Not my fault, Patrick started it.

‘What do you call a sleeping bull?’ He tapped me on the shoulder, looking at me expectantly

‘What?’ I asked, not knowing where this was going

‘I said, what do you call a sleeping bull?’ Patrick grinned, wide-mouthed

‘Is this a joke?’ I retorted, looking at the sidewalk

‘Yeses’ He smiled, ‘What do you call a sleeping bull?’

‘A bull dozer?’ I replied, having already heard this joke

Patrick pouted and kicked his feet.

‘You’re no fun’ His bottom lip jutting out

There was a brief silence, in which I tried to think about all the sad, lame jokes I was told as a kid. I beamed, remembering the best of all.

‘Pete, Patrick and Repeat were sat in a boat,’ I started, staring at him

‘Who calls their kid Repeat?’ Patrick interrupted

‘Doesn’t matter…’ I try again, ‘Right, so, Pete, Patrick and Repeat were sat in a boat...’

‘Why are we in a boat?’ He asked, no, interrupted again

‘Doesn’t matter…’ I try once again, getting a little more than angry, ‘So, Pete and Patrick fall out of the boat...’

‘I’ve never fallen out of a boat in my life!’ He interrupted for what I hoped would be the last time

‘Doesn’t matter,’ I growl, inhaling deeply to stop myself from hitting his stupid grinning face

‘It does matter’ He grumbled, clearly not seeing the rage in my eyes

‘You’re wrong… It doesn’t matter…’ I cross my arms, ‘Joke over’

‘No… Come on...’ He gestured with his hand, ‘I want to hear it’

‘Shut the fuck up then!’ I shout, a little too loud, he winced, ‘Thank you... Now... Pete, Patrick and… Oh fuck it... It’s not even funny now…’

‘Pete, Patrick and Repeat are in a boat,’ He recited, trying to mimic my tone, ‘Pete and Patrick fall out, which one’s left?’

‘Repeat’ I grumbled, not looking at him

‘Pete, Patrick and Repeat are in a boat,’ He laughed, ‘Pete and Patrick fall out, which one’s left?’

I looked him straight in the eye, not saying a word.

‘Oh fuck off’ I sighed

We finally turned up at Joe’s house after walking for what seemed like forever with the silence walking by our side. I wasn’t really angry. Patrick knew that but he wouldn’t say anything. He just kinda stood beside me looking amused. I frowned at him. He poked me in the ribs. I frowned at him. He poked some more. We had a system. It worked for us. I felt a little bad for shouting at him. He deserved it though. He was bugging me. He loves to bug me. Get under my skin. Waiting for a reaction. It annoyed the crap out of me but made me laugh.

‘Hey Re-Pete’ He poked me more, right in the armpit

‘Don’t… you… dare…’ I huffed, shaking my head

‘Okay…Okay..’ He laughed, ‘I won’t rock the boat’

‘I will kill you’ I smiled

‘Drown me?’ He snorted, making me steal his hat

‘Don’ttakemyhat’ He said in one breath, snatching at it

‘Why not?’ I held it by my side, not letting him get it

‘CauseI’mkindagoingbaldokaygiveitback!!’ He wrestled with me on Joe’s porch, desperate to get his head gear off of me

‘You are …’ I stop struggling and pass him his hat, ‘Bald?’

‘Going bald…’ He mumbled, covering his head back up

‘Liar...’ I hooted

‘Oh yeah…?’ He said, taking his hat off and turning his back to me

There was a small part of the very top of his head where the hair was a little bit thinner than the rest of his head. I laughed, hard. Patrick thought I was laughing because of his insecurities.

‘Told you so…’ Patrick groaned, his face a bright red

‘Patrick…’ I grab the back of his shoulders, ‘There’s nothing wrong with you…’

‘I’m bald, I’m getting fatter, I’m ugly, no one likes me, I can’t sing’ He babbled, continuously, like there was no stopping him

I placed my hand over his mouth and placed my lips to his ears.

‘Shut up… None of that is true… Get over it’ I whisper in a hushed tone, ‘You have a full head of hair, you’re not fat, everyone loves you and I swear, you say one bad thing about your singing I will have to eat you’

He shuddered, getting goose bumps up his arms. Nodding slowly, he turned around and kissed my forehead. I grimaced.

‘Quite finished?’ Joe asked from the doorway

I snapped my head towards him. Patrick went insanely crimson as I realized I was still holding on to him. Letting go, I headed into Joe’s house.

‘Just about’ I answered, punching him for breaking what I considered to be, a moment. ‘Asshole’

Getting to the basement I pulled Patrick’s hat down over his eyes.

‘Psst…’ I hissed at him, ‘Close your eyes

He nodded and shut them tight. Just to make sure he wasn’t peeking I wrapped a scarf around his eyes. Leading him over to a chair in the corner I very carefully dropped him down into it. Excitement rose up inside of me as I picked up his gift out of Joe’s hands. Joe was smiling like a fool. Placing the object carefully down in Patrick’s hands I was praying inside that he’d like it.

I untied the scarf at the back and it dropped down into his lap. His eyes almost popped out of his skull. His mouth fell open as he slowly unzipped the casing. There in his hands was the guitar his grandmother bought him. Brand new. All fixed and slightly tear stained. He pulled it out of the casing and in between the strings I’d left a note for him. It simply said, ‘Play this’, and with it was some tabs that Joe helped me write.

He opened the paper out and read over the tabs. Analyzing, learning it. Slowly, he started to strum. It was my song. My song for him. He sang along.

‘Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman
And maybe he won’t find out what I know
You were the last good thing about this part of town

When I wake up,
I’m willing to take my chances on
The hope I forget that you hate him
More than you notice
Yeah, I wrote this for you

You need him
I could be him
I could be an accident but I’m still trying
That’s more than I could say for him

Some day I’ll appreciate in value
Get off my ass and call you
But for the meantime I’ll sport my
Brand new fashion
Of waking up with pants on
At four in the afternoon

You need him
I could be him
I could be an accident but I’m still trying
That’s more than I could say for him
Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman
And maybe he won’t find out what I know
You were the last good thing about this part of town’

Joe looked stunned. I looked stunned. Hell, Patrick looked stunned. That was amazing. Joe was the first to talk.

‘We are so playing that live!’ Joe squealed with glee

‘We don’t even have a gig yet’ I slapped his head, ‘I’ve played with you guys for the grand total of one day’

‘Pete…’ I heard Trick say,

'Yeah?' I ask, smiling

'Thank you' He grinned, clutching his new toy to his chest, like he really expected Ash to appear and smash it again

I nodded.

‘No problem’ I smiled, patting his shoulder