FicWad

It was five past seven, and Jared had just made his way up the hill where he had arranged to meet Gerard. At the top he stopped and looked around. He broke into a smile and nodded approvingly to himself when he saw that Gerard wasn’t there.
So, the younger man was fighting in a different way now. Jared could see exactly what he was trying (and succeeding) to do. He was turning the tide, so that his time Jared was the one waiting for him, which gave him the appearance of being more in control right from the start.
Impressed, Jared sat down against a tree and began to sing quietly, watching the fast fading stars while he waited. At half past seven Gerard arrived. Though he didn’t appear to be showing any kind of emotion, Jared knew that inside he was exceptionally proud of himself. Without saying a word, Gerard sat down on the grass next to Jared.
“Hi there.” Jared smiled.
“Hi.” Was all he got in response. He decided to leave it there, and see who would end up speaking forest. It was more than just a silence; it was an unspoken challenge between the two men to see who could last out the longest. After a few minutes when Jared was pretty certain that Gerard wasn’t about to crack any time soon, he ended the contest and spoke.
“I'm actually really proud of you. You’re acting like you’re in charge, and that’s the key to being in charge. I'm definitely impressed.”
Gerard smiled satisfactorily. In fact, Jared would have said that it was more of a smirk than a smile.
“Believe it or not, I'm just telling myself ‘Think like Jared’.”
“Well, I'm flattered.”
There was another silence. Jared decided to end it sooner this time, seeing as they had already established Gerard was the victor in this particular contest.
“I knew that you’d come. I guess you knew it too. Anyway, now that you’re here, I have a little problem that I want sort out with you.”
For the first time in the conversation, Gerard looked over and made eye contact with Jared.
“Oh? And what could that be?”
Jared stood up and held out his hands to help Gerard up. Gerard completely ignored him and got up by himself. Jared smiled and his perseverance and took his hand, moving so they were face to face.
“Why don’t you want to want anyone to see us together?” he asked.
“Because.” Gerard replied, as if the one word was answer enough in itself. For an experiment, Jared decided to let Gerard be the one in control, to see if he really could keep it up. The younger man was doing spectacularly well, and it would be a shame to bring him back down again.
“Because?” he asked. “You don’t have a reason?”
“Do I need one?”
“I’d goddamn like one, yes.”
“Why? I get the feeling that you just want to show off, and there’s no way I'm prepared to let you do that.”
Jared raised his eyebrows, highly offended.
“And what gives you that idea?”
Gerard raised his eyebrows back.
“Have you ever thought about how you act? All you ever do seems to revolve around making people think how ‘wonderful’ you are.”
Even though Jared saw a little truth in what Gerard had said, he was stung.
“So you’re saying I'm an attention seeker and I show off?”
When Gerard didn’t reply, Jared decided enough was enough. Watching Gerard take charge was fascinating, but the younger man had pushed it too far.
“Look, drop it now.” he said. “That’s plain rude. I thought you were bigger than that.
“But I'm being you, remember?” Gerard replied. “I should be allowed to be disrespectful and treat other people like this.”
“This is about respect?” Jared asked, as the reason for Gerard’s change in attitude hit him. “Why didn’t you say?”
“Oh, and what do you think you’d have said back?” Gerard retorted. Jared had to admit he had a point.
“Come here.”
Stepping closer, he closed the gap between them and slipped his arms round Gerard’s waist. Gerard didn’t protest, but he made no move to return the embrace.
“Look, I do respect you. I respect your fire, the way you can regain your dignity even when you’ve been humiliated. I respect your amazing talents as a musician and lyricist. And this conversation has made me respect you as a mature man who knows how to control a situation.”
Gerard scowled. “Then why don’t you ever show it? You always make we feel like I'm so fucking stupid!”
“Because,” Jared explained, “It makes you react. And I love that attitude you have; I can’t get enough of it. I know how to draw it out of you, that’s why I piss you off so much. It’s the only way I can get you to be so fiery. I'm sorry. “
Gerard didn’t say anything, but he hugged Jared back. Jared knew him well enough to realise that this was him accepting the explanation and wanting got act like it hadn’t happened. He pressed a soft kiss on Gerard’s lips and smiled happily.
“I love you.”
Gerard buried his head in Jared’s neck with a quiet mumble.
“Love you too.”

Mikey, Frank, Bob, Ray and Brian were in the coach, waiting for Gerard to return from wherever he had mysteriously disappeared of to while they were all asleep. They were waiting for him to come back so they could watch what they had filmed, and they were all eager to get on with it. Frank, impatient as ever, was passing the time by seeing if he could whistle cheesy pop hits. Everyone gradually became more and more annoyed, until Ray had to snap at him to stop it.
By the time Gerard was back, his bandmates were all grouchy and had S Club 7 hits replaying in their minds, slowly driving them insane.
“Well aren’t you a cheery bunch.” He commented dryly, stepping over brains and Ray’s outstretched legs to take a seat.
“You took your sweet time.” Brian complained.
“Yeah, what were you doing?” Mikey asked, slightly suspiciously.
“I went for a walk.” Gerard replied. Mikey looked at him disbelievingly but said nothing more. “Wait a minute.” He stopped and listened carefully. “Bob, are you humming Never Had a Dream Come True?”
“No.” Bob stopped humming and looked away as Gerard laughed.
“Can we watch it now?” asked Frank.
Brian nodded and put the DVD into Ray’s laptop. For about an hour they watched, laughing at the part when Matt was proposing to Spencer and getting bored during the less exciting parts, occasionally throwing in comments such as ‘We have to put that in’, and ‘That sucks. Who filmed it anyway?’
When the screen went blank and slightly fuzzy, signalling the end of the recording, Brian decided to make a list. He drew a line down the middle of a piece of paper, and at the top he wrote ‘In’ on one side and ‘Out’ on the other. In the ‘In’ column, he wrote ‘Spencer/Matt proposition’. He stopped and looked up at the others.
“Okay, what else do you think we should have?” he asked them.
“I think we should have the bit in Ray and Frank’s room at the start.” said Bob. “It’s good because it shows a bit about the motel and stuff.”
“Mmm.” Brain wrote ‘Frank/Ray motel room’ in the ‘In’ column.
“We should have that bit in the field where we’re completely hyper, said Mikey. “It’s really nice, if a little odd.”
“Yeah, okay.” ‘Hyper in field’ was added.
“I don’t think that-” Gerard began, but he cut himself off and looked in surprise at the laptop screen, which had flickered back into life again.
And was showing Frank and Ray heatedly making out.

~*~

It was about time, Jared thought, that he needed to talk to his brother. There were probably two men in the entire world that could make him feel insecure, and they were Shannon (who had been one for all his life), and Gerard (who he had discovered was one a few hours ago). The same two men were the only ones who could properly build him back up into his normal, confident self. Gerard had just unknowingly knocked him down, and now he needed Shannon to reassure him.
When Matt and Tomo were absorbed in yet another Mariokart race and Shannon was engrossed in the Fifa ‘06 player’s manual, Jared cautiously approached him.
“Hey, Shannon?”
Shannon looked up and nodded.
“Can we talk?”
“Sure.” Frowning a little, Shannon put down the manual and patted the space on the sofa next to him, gesturing for Jared to sit down.
“Oh… I…” Jared glanced awkwardly at Tomo and Matt, then at the door, then back at Shannon.
Getting the message, Shannon nodded and stood, leaving mat and Tomo’s motel room with Jared following him. Stopping in the corridor he asked,
“Is this private enough?”
Jared shifted from foot to foot uncomfortably for a few seconds, and then took Shannon’s hand and pulled him into their room. Shannon, although a bit curious, sat down on the nearest bed and waited patiently for Jared to speak, with an air that suggested he had been through this many times before, and had loved every single one.
After fidgeting under his brother’s gaze for a minute, Jared voiced his uncertainties.
“Shannon, do you think I'm just an attention seeker and I show off?”
Shannon was shocked. Usually Jared’s problems were things that he was seeking permission for, like ‘Do you think I should date Scarlett?’, and once it had been ‘Do you think it’s wrong if I'm bisexual?’, but it had never been him doubting his personality or the way he acted.
“An attention seeker?” Shannon repeated, looking at his usually-so-assertive brother, somewhat dumbfounded.
“Yeah, like, well, you know. And do I show off?”
His curiosity ablaze, Shannon couldn’t help but wonder just what had made Jared so uncertain of himself. Still, he set that aside and answered.
“Yes, of course you are. But that’s a good thing. Well, it’s not so much that you’re an attention seeker than attention seeks you. You act, that’s become a part of who you are. The way you are, you just draw attention to yourself without even meaning to. You’re’ a fascinating person, and there’s something abut you that interests people.”
Jared looked partly reassured by his brother’s words, but no where near completely.
“But do I show off?” he asked.
“Again, you do a bit, but it’s who you are. You act so surely about everything you do; no one can tell if you don’t even have a clue. And it’s part of you that we all love. We can kind of follow you, like you’re our rock. I don’t know what we’d do if you weren’t so confident. You just come across as an insanely loveable prick, and that’s all anyone wants you to be.”
Trying to work out whether the last part of what Shannon had said was an insult or a compliment, Jared pulled a doubting face.
“Are you sure?”
Shannon nodded. Jared gave a small smile, clearly more at peace with himself. He hugged Shannon tightly.
“Thanks.”
“No problem.” said Shannon. “Although I'm really interested, why were you so worried about that?”
“Well… Gerard said…” was the explanation he received, but it was all he needed.
Gerard. So Jared really did care about what Gerard thought of him. Shannon couldn’t remember the last time Jared has questioned himself because of what his other half had thought, usually they were just either: a) to look good or b) because he thought they were attractive. But it seemed like Gerard was about to change all that.
“He means a lot to you, huh?” he asked.
“Just a bit,” Jared sighed.

~*~

“No. No. No, no, no!” Frank repeated over and over again like an infuritated child who had a thousand words that they wanted to use to express themselves, but were only able to manage one. “No!”
“How…?” asked Ray, staring at the now blank screen in utter shock.
Gerard, Mikey, Bob and Brian were also in shock, but for the Way brothers and Bob it was also delight. Gerard turned his head to Bob and Mikey, a small smile creeping up his face. They grinned for a moment before breaking out into whoops and cheers.
“Way to go guys!”
“I knew something was going on!”
“Care to explain?” Brian demanded, cutting through the noise. Ray smiled sheepishly at him.
“Well, you’ve pretty much seen it all.” He stopped and took Frank’s hand, trying to persuade him to stop hiding behind his hair. “Frank and I… we like each other. There isn’t really much to explain.” Frank gave a little nod as his contribution, since talking would expose some of his bright red face and might move the curtain of fringe that he was currently using to shield himself from his friend’s gazes.
“I can see that.” Brian said, looking at the blank screen of Ray’s laptop where the image had been shown. “What I want to know is why we didn’t get told about this!”
Frank sort of mumbles something that no one could make out, although they guessed it was some kind of explanation, and buried his face in Ray’s shoulder. Ray sighed and put his arm around him, realising he was going to have to do the talking. The problem was he didn’t have much to say. He wasn’t about to tell everyone that Frank had wanted to keep it quiet, that would just focus everyone’s attention on the younger guitarist and make it pointless even trying to avoid it in the first place. At the same time, he didn’t particularly fancy taking the blame, especially since he hadn’t even been against telling them.
“Look, sorry guys.” He said. “There was just a lot going on, and we made a joint decision to tell you when we felt ready. It’s only been going on a few days.”
“But did you really think we wouldn’t notice?” Brian persisted.
“No. Oh, sorry, okay? We didn’t realise you’d mind so much?”
“Mind? We pride ourselves on being our friends, and that you can tell us things!”
“Oh, and we’re the only ones with secrets?” Ray shot back, starting to get annoyed, which was really quite unusual for him. Everyone shifted uncomfortably.
“Right, what do you say we leave it here?” Mikey proposed, breaking the tension. “We respect each other’s privacy, yeah? Ray and Frank, you had every right to not tell us if you felt didn’t want to. At the same time, anyone here with a secret does not have to tell it. It’s a personal choice.” He only just stopped himself from looking pointedly at Gerard and Bob.
“Yeah, he’s right.” Gerard agreed, silently respecting his brother. The words coming out of Mikey’s mouth were sensible and mature, yet he and Bob knew that he was as keen on poking his nose into other people’s businesses as the rest of them.
“Yeah, you’re right. I'm sorry.” said Brian. “I got kind of carried away.”
“That’s fine.” Said Ray, stroking Frank’s hair as the younger man leaned against him. At least he was facing the others this time.
There was a comfortable silence that was shortly broken by Brian, who, glancing at his watch, decided to become the heralder of some interesting news.
“Well, enjoy yourselves for an hour guys, then we’re going bowling.”
“I'm sorry?” asked Ray in surprise.
“Yeah, the fuck?” added Gerard.
“I’ve arranged with the lovely people from 30 Seconds to Mars and Panic! At The Disco to go bowling in the city. In about… one hour.”
“Right, thanks for the warning.” said Bob.
“You’re welcome” Brian smiled cheerfully.
Gerard sighed and rolled his eyes. Bowling. Great!

~*~

“Jon, do something!” Spencer pleaded, looking helplessly at Brendon as the vocalist bounced power balls off the dressing room walls. He had started off with just one (which Spencer had just about been able to handle), but then it was two (which was pushing it) and then three (which really did hit limit). When a ball landed hard in Spencer’s lap, he snapped. He may be a drummer, but the irregular dull thuds were going to drive him mad. However he was well aware of his pack of power when it came to Brendon, and so he was recruiting Jon.
Shooting the fed up drummer a sympathetic look Jon put down the sudoku he was puzzling over and crossed the room to Brendon, laying a hand on his shoulder.
“Brendon, calm down a bit and put those away.”
“Aww.” Brendon complained, doing his best puppy eyes, but he gathered his power balls back off the floor (and one off Spencer’s lap), and put them in the dressing table drawer.
“Thank you.” Jon smiled, giving Brendon a quick hug.
“But what am I meant to do now? I'm bored!” the energetic man whined, slumping down on a chair and drumming his fingers against the armrest.
“Try a sudoku.” Jon suggested, going back to his chair. He gestured to his puzzle book.
“Boring! I don’t know how you stand them. Oh come on, I wanna do something!”
Jon rolled his eyes and put down his sudoku book, standing and stretching.
“Come on then, get a ball –only one, mind!– and we can go and bounce it off a tree somewhere.”
“YAY! I love you Jon!” Brendon cheered, giving Jon a backbreaking hug, grabbing a florescent pink power ball out of the drawer and running outside, all in the space of a few seconds.
“Jon, you’re my hero.” said Spencer, watching the door swing shut behind the hurricane that was their lead singer. Jon smiled fondly.
“All part of being in a band with him. Anyway, it’s only for a few minutes, and then we need to get down to the bowling place. Join us outside when you’re ready.” He said.
Spencer nodded and Jon left.
“How does he do it?” the drummer asked in amazement, turning to Ryan who was sitting on the sofa next to him, scribbling quietly in his notebook.
“Hmm?” Ryan asked, looking up.
“He keeps so calm! And I swear he’s magic or something. Brendon always listens to him but never to us! He always puts up with him too. How?”
“Well,” Ryan chuckled, “Jon is pretty special. He’s just naturally calm, and I think Brendon respects that. But you know, you really should be used to Brendon being so hyper by now. He’s like it almost every day.”
“Yeah, I know. It’s just those goddamn balls! They go everywhere! And they actually really hurt. I bet I'm going to get a bruise now.”
Ryan bit back a laugh and asked,
“Where did he even get them from anyway?”
“I bet you it was Frank,” grumbled Spencer.
There was a few seconds worth of silence in which they both realised how boring it was without Brendon.
“Shall we go then?” asked Ryan.
“Right-o.”

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Michiko loves you.

Right, Merry Christmas!! This one’s going to be in two parts, hopefully the next will be up by New Year. Read and review, hope you like it!
xxx