FicWad

From time to time I find myself obsessing
But that's because obsessing is all that I've known
I feel embarrassed when I think about it too much
It's just another one of those things that makes me feel small
I just find the things that I like and hold them to my heart
And sometimes I fear that I hold them to close
I know it's because I'm afraid of rejection
And when I find something that's unable to reject me I feel safe
I listen to it, read about it, watch it, and when I can talk about it
I analyze it till I can't understand it any more, even if I tried (and I have tried)
I fantasize about meeting people
Sing songs under my breath that I listen to too much
Stare at a poster on my wall wishing that they were really standing in front of me
I defend my obsessions when they are put down by someone I know
Trying to make them see the beauty that I see
Trying to tell myself that the guy I'm crushing on hates my favorite band