FicWad

I sit here, in a corner booth of Canter's Deli, watching and waiting for him. I alternate between staring at my water glass and the door, hoping that soon he'll appear. Yes, you heard right. He.

He came into the store I work in a few days ago, all tight black jeans and shaggy black hair, a copy of an Aerosmith drawing I did in his hands. Told me his name was Izzy. Izzy Stradlin, a name that's made me blush more than once. Seeing him stand there, one long fingered hand on his hip, the other clutching my drawing, I couldn't help but catch my breath. Me, who at seventeen is already a bit of a womaniser, was falling for a guy. There was something about him: the dark eyes, the long hair, the almost androgynous look. Just looking at him and listening to his husky drawl made my cock twitch.

You're in Hell-A Slash, where everything's twisted and nothing is how it seems.

My thoughts break and I look up from the table as a movement catches my eye. My breath hitches as he walks in. Cheap sunglasses shield his eyes from the gritty LA sun, long legs again wrapped in those tight black jeans. I feel myself blush as he notices me and nods in my direction. Shakily I stand as he walks towards me, a nervous smile on my face. I must look like a complete idiot, some stupid kid on his first date. I've been with girls but never a so what the fuck am I supposed to do?

He slides into the booth opposite me, oozing more confidence than I'll ever have. Yet, as I sit, he removes his sunglasses and I notice that his eyes are dilated and he's as nervous as I am.

"Hey Slash," he whispers in the voice that's haunted my dreams.

I swallow and wipe my sweaty hands on my jeans.

"Hey Izzy," I quietly reply, my throat drying out. "Thanks for coming."

His dark eyes drop to the table and a touch of red flushes his cheeks. He gives me a small shrug, his eyes briefly flicking back to mine.

"I'm not busy." God, that voice sends tingles down my spine. "It's great to meet another musician."

I can't take my eyes off him, drinking up his beauty.

"Yeah, welcome to LA," I reply. "You'll find plenty more here."

He nods, his eyes never staying on mine for more than a second. Hidden behind dark shades he was the most confident person in the world. But now, stripped of his cloak, he's vulnerable and exposed... naked. I nervously lick my lips and feel my cock stir as I imagine what he'd look like spread naked on my bed.

Needing to distract myself, I discreetly pull my wallet out and survey the cash situation. I had to scrape it together but there's enough for a meal.

"Would you like to order something?" I ask, trying to act like I know what I'm doing.

I've never been on a date like this before, never asked someone out on a date. My experience extends to turning up at a girl's houses, getting stoned and getting laid. At least, that's how I remember it. My inexperience must be showing because Izzy lifts his head and gives me a small, reassuring smile, a smile that seems to be telling me that he's feeling the same way.

As I reach for the menu, my hand brushes against Izzy's as he does the same. I blush and quickly pull away, hiding my eyes. Instead, he takes my hand and I watch, embarrassed, as he gently holds it. My breath comes in short gasps as his calloused fingers softly brush over mine. Goosebumps race up my arms as Izzy looks me in the eye and gently presses a soft kiss to my fingers. Fuck, his lips are like velvet and my mind again wanders, wondering what it would be like to kiss him. Nerves get the better of me and I quickly pull my hand back, hiding it under the table, my eyes following.

"I'm sorry," I hear him whisper. "I thought it's what you wanted."

"Wanted what?" I hear myself ask, my eyes quickly flicking back to him.

"Don't mess me around Slash." He looks at me, eyes suddenly stern. "I'm insecure in myself as it without being messed around about my sexuality by some kid." He sighs and rakes his fingers through that soft, messy hair. "I had enough shit about it when I was in Indiana."

My throat's like a desert; Izzy wasn't straight. Was there the possibility that he liked me? But he had knocked me back, called me a kid. That fuckin' hurt. Fuckin' hit me like a sledgehammer to the heart. I drop my eyes away from him, scared to look at him in case he did it again. To hide the pain, I pick up my water glass and take a sip, trying to think.

Come on Slash. You can do it. Do something to show that you're interested and not just "some kid".

Putting down the glass, I lean across the table and, holding my breath, I gently kiss him. Fuck, his lips feel great. I could spend the rest of my life kissing this man. His eyes snap up to mine, wide and filled with fear. Quickly I pull away, scared. Have I fucked up again? Maybe he doesn't swing that way after all...

"Sorry..." It's my turn to apologise.

"No, don't be." His voice is quiet, shaking slightly. His eyes drop back to the table. "I'm sorry about what I said. It's just..." He sighs deeply, still avoiding my gaze. "... back in Indiana, I had a boyfriend. I loved him, really fuckin' loved him. But he didn't feel the same as I did. We messed around for a couple of years before he decided that I wasn't what he wanted. In the last few months of high school, he told everyone that I was gay. I'd had enough problems as it was but now I had to face going into school every day. I was beaten up, spat on, taunted. All because of what he said."

I watch as a single tear falls from Izzy's down-turned eyes and hits the table. Reaching over, I shyly run a finger over his cheek, brushing the tears away. He moves his head slightly, leaning into the touch and I let my fingers linger. I feel honoured that he's telling me this, spilling his heart out to me.

"So I came to LA when I graduated," he continues, a hand coming up to touch mine. "Thought I'd escape."

"Do you, you know." I shrug. "Have a boyfriend?"

He looks up at me, gently removing my hand from his face but not letting it go. Closing his eyes for a moment, he shakes his head, hair falling into his eyes. I can't help but reach out and brush it away. I need to look into that face, need to look at how perfect it is.

"I was scared to even think about it," his voice never raises above a whisper, as if he's scared of being found out. "I didn't want to go through the pain again."

Gently I squeeze his fingers, trying to be reassuring. "I'm not like that. I won't hurt you."

He smiles weakly. "You're young Slash. You need time to find yourself."

Leaning over the table, I gently rest my forehead against his, looking deep into those soulful eyes.

"I think I might have found myself just now."

His smile is still gentle as he leans closer, kissing me. It's quick and over in a moment, but it's enough to let me know that it doesn't matter what's between a person's legs, you really can't help who you fall in love with.