FicWad

Silence engulfed the landscape. It was a still silence, the kind that often foretold some sort of unexpected attack. Where is she? The man thought to himself urgently.
At the same moment he realized the presence behind him, he felt the wind of the shuriken flying towards him. He easily jumped to avoid the shuriken, but the moment he landed, the grass beneath him began to come to life and it twisted and twined around his legs. Curse this grass ninja! The man grumbled to himself as he attempted to pull himself free of the twines of grass that were binding his legs.
Suddenly, the man’s enemy appeared out of the corner of his eye. He quickly reached for the sword on his back and swung Samehada at the grass ninja, effectively cutting him in half. However, the instead of falling limply to the ground as it should have, the body disintegrated and turned into thousands of blades of grass.
Seeing an opening, the real grass ninja appeared behind Kisame and wrapped a rope of grass around his neck in an attempt to choke him to death. Before Kisame could whip around Samehada, the vines of grass on his legs crept up his arms and down Samehada.
“Some help would be nice right about now,” he barely choked out. A short while later – as if making a point that he didn’t come when called like some little puppy – Itachi appeared in front of his partner. Kisame immediately closed his eyes, knowing not to look into the deathly wheels of the Mangekyou Sharingan. However, the grass ninja apparently lacked this knowledge. Kisame could feel him jolt back, as if he had received an electrical shock, and then go slightly limp. A few moments later, the man let out a shriek of complete agony and soon fell to the ground. As the rope around his neck fell to the ground and the grass binding his legs, arms, and sword fell lifeless once more, Kisame ran through the possibilities of what Itachi could have done to the man. Running through one gruesome thought after another, a grin of pure amusement spread across the aquatic man’s face.
“Any way I think of it, seems like you’ve had a pretty miserable trip to the realm of the Mangekyou Sharingan,” Kisame observed as turned to the collapsed man behind him. “Why don’t I do you a favor and put you out of your misery!” he finished as he sliced Samehada through the man’s torso. As he withdrew his sword and replaced it on his back – not bothering to wipe the blood off but instead preferring the scent of a fresh kill to linger for a while longer – he let out a half-laugh half-sigh. As much as he loved a good kill, he did begin to regret it from time to time. Perhaps he was really putting them out of their misery and the torture of the Mangekyou was worse than that of Samehada’s blade. But why should he let Itachi have all the fun?
“That guy sure got what was coming to him.” Kisame sneered “You’d think he’d have given up the information on the eight-tails after I chopped off his left arm – gotta give him kudos for still trying to kill me after that. Most of ‘em go crying home to their mommies by then.”
“Stop getting so much enjoyment out of these missions, Kisame-san. Our goal, first and foremost, was to gather information about the eight-tails. People can’t give information once their dead.” Itachi scolded in his usual monotone.
“Hey, you were the one who used Mangekyou on him. They can’t talk once mentally scarred beyond recovery either,” Kisame replied dismissively, still obviously amused by having obtained yet another victim of Samehada.
“I wouldn’t have had to have used it if you hadn’t been so careless as to give that ninja an opening to kill you,” Itachi replied coolly.
“He’s right, Kisame-san. You really screwed up,” Zetsu commented as he appeared from a tree nearby.
“I’m sure Leader-sama will be pleased to hear about another one of your failures, Kisame-san,” the darker side of his face added.
“Like you have the right to criticize, Zetsu-san. All you do is follow the rest of us around. Hide in the shadows, and report back to Leader-sama like some faithful little pet. I’d like to see you go on a real mission for once,” Kisame mocked.
“I’m heading back. I’d rather not stand around here all day,” Itachi interjected before Kisame and the darker side of Zetsu could break out in a full-out war.
“You seem eager to get back, Itachi-san,” the lighter face observed.
“I . . . erm . . . have some presents to wrap,” Itachi replied awkwardly.
“Hehe . . . I almost forgot it was Christmas Eve,” the darker face chuckled. “I have some presents to wrap, as well,” he remarked with a slight hint of malice that sent a chill down Itachi and Kisame’s spines at the thought of what they’d be finding under the tree the next morning . . . assuming they were actually allowed to have a tree this year.