FicWad

A/N: AHHHH I accidentally put a bit of planning here, FORGIVE ME!

IVORY

Chapter 9
To End a Bad Day in Style

--

You're probably wondering what happened to my friendship after that party. Short answer: nada, long answer: a lot, but I won't get into that yet. I had lost my virginity to my best friend and as if that wasn't a mistake enough on its own, I did it while his brother was on my mind. Even if it was a betrayal that he welcomed, it was wrong of me to do that to him, and allow him to do that to himself. But in the heat of the moment, common sense was lost on me.

It wasn't until that evening when Yakov drove me to Pasticcio that it all dawned on me. If Mace really did fall in love with me - which I found even more difficult to believe than Eddie doing so - then it must hurt him to think his brother had already won. At the same time, I worried that maybe such thoughts were selfish and arrogant of me, to think anyone was in love with me. What was so special about me? Why couldn't such hot guys find other hot guys to fall in love with? But it scared me that if I was so lucky to have such great guys fall for me, I had screwed it up with Mace by not returning the feelings, and I had screwed it up with Eddie by letting Mace do that with me. The last thing I wanted to do was create a rift between brothers.

The second we arrived at Pasticcio I leapt from the car and sped in and through the building. I flew through the sea of tables, and to the 'staff only' door near the back. In the dressing room, I found Ciel adjusting a bra, and a couple other drag queens bickering over wigs. He looked up and when he saw that it was just me, he went back to what he was doing, as if I weren't worth any more of an acknowledgement. In response to his attitude, I pouted.

"Ciel... I had sex with Mace!"

He paused for a moment to absorb that bit of information, but not a single bit of him seemed to give a damn. As he went on to stuff the cups of his bra with fake breasts. The pretentious ass that he was, all he could do was shrug and say, "Good for you."

I stared at him for a moment. He looked a little less handsome then usual in women's underwear and heavy glittery makeup but it didn't make a difference. He was an asshole no matter what he wore. For some reason I valued his opinion though. So I continued, "Mace is Eddie's brother!"

"Did you use a condom?" Ciel's silvery blue eyes focused on me for a moment and he offered a faux interested smile.

"... Yes...?"

His expression vanished and he went back to preparing his breasts. "Très bon." When he noticed me glaring at him, he rolled his eyes and pulled his dark blue gown off of a hanger by his vanity table. "I already told you what I thought, but you ignored it. Promiscuity is natural for a young man your age coming to terms with his sexuality, but after what happened, the more men you sleep with the worse you'll feel, and then you'll sleep with more to try to numb the pain. What do you want me to say?"

"Tell me if I screwed up my chances with Eddie. Tell me what to do!"

"Even if you didn't screw things up with him, I suggest you smarten your act up before you allow anything to happen there." He stepped into the gown and adjusted it over his false curves. "Unless if you're already an item, it's really none of his business if you have sex with someone, although since you're talking about his brother, I guess it all depends on their brotherly relationship. Maybe he won't mind, and maybe he will."

I sat on a stool and sighed. "Mace said he loves me."

Ciel seemed increasingly annoyed by my problems. "Well everything just keeps on getting more and more complicated with you, doesn't it? If that boy you're talking about told Eddie that, then you wouldn't have much of a chance even if you didn't sleep with him. I think you should stop bothering me and go talk to Eddie about this face to face. I think he's at the bar down the street, anyway. But talk to him later. You have a performance to get ready for soon."

He was right. I had to talk to Eddie. I didn't even know what was going on with the guy since I hadn't seen him in so long. Would he even care? Feeling a little discouraged, I nodded and turned to leave the dressing room. I wanted to grab a drink before I went to perform.

I trudged my way out the door only to be stopped my a familiar flash of golden hair in the corner of my eye. I turned suddenly to see Eddie leaning against the wall near the door I had just come out of. Had he heard what I had said? Like a deer caught in headlights, I just stood there, frozen to the spot with fear rising in me. If he heard, would he hate me? Was he upset? Or worse; did he not give a damn? It was so hard to tell from trying to read his face.

His hair was messy in a sexy bedhead kind of way, and his green eyes were a little red around the edges and bloodshot. He looked absolutely exhausted. Even his black pants and blue silk shirt were wrinkled and a little dirty as if he had been awake in them for days. But even in such a disheveled state, he looked good. Guess that's why he was a model. His eyes gave me a once over before he pushed away from the wall and headed past me.

When he walked away, I felt as though my heart had stopped completely. Did that mean... I didn't even know what that meant. Was he mad? I turned and watched after him, only to see him stop a few feet away, and turn his head to the side as if to direct his words at me without facing me.

"Come." A simple order, and then he was walking again. He went to the counter where the drinks were served and took a seat as he told the bartender what he wanted.

I bit my lip nervously, innerly wishing that this day would just end already before it got the chance to get even more stressful. But regardless of my self-pity, I obeyed hesitantly and went over to sit on the chair beside him just in time to be served a drink that he apparently had ordered for me. Rum and coke. Denis probably wouldn't approve of me drinking before work, but after that Bar-b-que, it would be too hard to perform without a little alcohol taking the edge off.

He took a few gulps of his beer before looking at me. "I don't want you to ever do that with him again. In fact, I would prefer if you didn't have sex with anyone, but I can't control you, so just promise me you won't do it with Mace."

"Uh, I..." I was shocked that he would be so forward about it. It took me a moment or two to find my words. "I promise..."

"Good. I hate being jealous." He chugged down half of the mug as if it were an elixir of immortality. When the mug hit the counter, he shook his head slowly and sighed. He was a wreck. Maybe I wasn't the only one who had a bad day. "Almost as much as I hate being drunk. So he loves you?"

I shrugged and pouted down into the caramel darkness of my rum and coke. At least he didn't seem to hate me. He even had said he was jealous, so did that mean I had a chance? "That's what he said, but it was probably just pillow talk, ya know?"

Saying that didn't seem to comfort him at all. He seemed a little more annoyed by that. Those green eyes focused on me and when I turned slightly to glance into them, I expected to see resentment or anger or something along those lines, but all I saw was a very tired man gazing at me. That man needed sleep so bad and seeing it made me want to just take him into bed again, but maybe that was for my own selfish reasons.

"Do you love him?" He asked quietly, finally tearing his eyes away.

"I love him like a friend." I sipped my drink and looked around to watch Denis and Lachlan on the stage, arguing about something. They looked a lot like an old married couple. Just seeing Lachlan made me a little nervous and my mind went back to what I had heard when I went to go see him. Luckily I didn't have to face him yet. I didn't know how on earth I would manage to do so. As much as I wanted to be distracted by them, I had to tell the truth. Eddie was someone I couldn't lie to, not because he'd see through it the way his brother does, but because I couldn't bear the horrible feeling lying to him would instill in me. "But I told him before hand how I felt about you..."

He finished the rest of the mug and got up. "I'm going home, and going to sleep. Maybe when I'm able to comprehend simple sentences again, I'll come back to finish this conversation."

I stared at him for a moment before scowling and grabbing his arm to stop him from going anywhere. "I ain't gonna let you go home alone in this state. You might pass out on the street somewhere or fall in the metro tracks. Come on, there's a couch in the office you can sleep on until Pasticcio closes and then I'll take you home."

Eddie looked at me as if I had gone insane, and opened his mouth as if to refuse. For some reason or other he seemed to think better of it and shrugged as he pried my fingers off his arm. "Fine. I had a friend who was going to drive me home, but I'd rather inconvenience you."

"Should I be flattered or insulted?"

--

Work went well as it usually did. When I wasn't on stage, I busied myself helping the other queens with their makeup or costumes. If Lachlan thought I was avoiding him, he was right. Eventually he seemed to give up on getting a chance to talk to him, but he looked a little confused every time he looked at me. Of course he had no reason to suspect that I had been to his place that weekend so he didn't know what was going on. Surely I owed it to him to clear it up, but still I couldn't bring myself to do something like that.

But finally all the customers were shooed out the door and the cleaners came in to tidy up. Since that was usually the time where the cast sat around and chatted and stuff while waiting for rides or taxis or friends, that meant I wouldn't be able to avoid Lachlan, so I went immediately to the office where Eddie was sleeping, intending on waking him right up so we could get out of there. But when I got in the office, the soft glow of a reading lamp in the corner cast such a delicate light over the sleeping man, making him look so much more... peaceful than he usually looked. It softened his stone-like features, and there was no way I could just wake him up when he was like that.

I smiled at him and approached the faux leather couch. He was so hot sleeping and awake. No matter what state he was in, he was nearly irresistible. I kneeled down on the floor in front of him, and rested one arm on a part of the cushion against his shoulder, admiring him for a second or two or three. My other arm drifted up and I gently tucked a couple of blonde locks behind his ear so that I could see his face better.

Just experimentally, I spoke to him fairly quietly, "Eddie... Wake up..." When there was no sign that he heard me, or was about to wake up, I grinned, and caressed his cheek with the back of my fingers and softly sang to him. "Ooh, I know your heart's like mine. Oh yeah... And I will find the time to make you mine."

As I was about to lean over and kiss him on the forehead, a voice interrupted me.

"What's going on, Ike?"

I jerked my head around with surprise to see Lachlan standing in the doorway. Great. At least I tried to avoid him. Considering we worked together, it was bound to fail sooner or later. I frowned and got up, reluctantly stepping away from Eddie as if I had been caught with my hand in a cookie jar. It was a little embarrassing having been caught in such a position with a sleeping man. Lachlan might think I was some kind of pervert. "Don't talk so loud. You'll wake him up."

"Why are you avoiding me? Did I do something wrong?"

"No." I looked over at Eddie, kind of hoping he would wake up and save me from this. No chance. He wasn't stirring a bit. "It's my mistake. Though I kinda wished you would have told me you had a lover when I asked you to kiss me that time..."

He stared at me blankly. "Lover? I don't have a lover."

"It's not really a big deal. It just would have been nice to know before so I wouldn't have gone to your place and heard that." I scowled at him with resentment. "Now I feel like an idiot, and now I can't look at you without hearing that, and it's embarrassing. Then I had to go call Mace to pick me up and he had to question me for being in that area, you ass."

"Oh..." He looked away shamefully, his face clouded with guilt. "That wasn't a lover. I guess I should tell you, though I'm surprised you don't know already. The queens around here aren't exactly known for keeping secrets... Do you remember when I said I had a second job?" Now it was my turn to stare blankly. So he quickly told me, "I'm a prostitute."

That threw me back. My eyes widened in shock, and I studied him for any sign that it might be a joke. His rugged Australian face was as sincere as ever, and his brows were furrowed nervously as he awaited my reaction. He'd have a long wait because I had no clue how to react. Male prostitutes were those skinny little boys yelling and begging men to pay them for sex or drugs or both. Lachlan was buff and healthy-looking, and sweet, and charming, and a drag queen. Was that why Ciel tried to keep me away from him?

So what was I supposed to feel? Beyond shock, as much as I tried, I just couldn't force myself to be hurt by it. Maybe it was because I had already given up any plans to sleep with him, and I wasn't exactly the poster boy for honesty myself, so I couldn't blame others for keeping secrets. It really wasn't any of my business, but I still thought I should feel something. "Lachlan, that's dangerous... You could get so many diseases or bashed so easily or killed..."

"Yeah, Denis reminds me of that every day." He shrugged then flashed me a playful smile as he suddenly changed the subject. "So what were you doing over at my place?"

"That's enough." The voice came from behind me. I turned to see Eddie getting up. Once his feet met the ground, he walked over to me, and put an arm over my shoulders as he glared at Lachlan. "Now that everything's cleared up, would you mind giving Ike and I a little privacy?"

Lachlan furrowed his brows with insult as he squirmed a little under the other man's glare. As uncomfortable as he was, he met the green eyes and tried not to allow himself to be stared down, but ended up failing anyway. He bid me farewell and informed me that he was leaving and that I'm welcome to come back to his place anytime, but none of his words really penetrated my focus at that moment. As soon as he was out the door, I turned and gave Eddie a half-assed shove.

"What the hell were you doing?" I spoke through clenched teeth, feeling a little embarrassed, and somewhat relieved that he had saved me from answering that question. "How long were you listening? How long have you been awake?"

Eddie straightened his shirt, smoothing out the wrinkles as best he could. "Since before you walked in. I was just going to rest my eyes until you decided to tell me we were gonna go. When you started singing I thought if I opened my eyes then, it would embarrass you."

"I'm embarrassed anyway, jerk! It kinda defeats the whole purpose if you just tell me right after, don't it?"

"You asked, so I told you."

I scowled and turned away from him. "Sure you can answer those kinds of questions but when I ask you something more important to me, suddenly you're mister quiet. I don't know what planet you are from where that kind of thing is tolerated, but I'm beginning to think you're just playing games with me. Even Yakov, who I didn't even know that you knew, has the pleasure of knowing things about how you feel when I don't know a damn thing. I don't even know that you don't hate me."

Something about what I said appeared to bother him. His face was still as expressionless as ever, but there was anger in his green eyes as he stepped towards me again. For every step he took, I deepened my frown and backed up. He stayed completely silent - I couldn't even hear him breath or notice him blink - until he had me back up against a wall. I had my arms down at my sides and my palms against the wall as if it would help me spring and dash away should something bad happen. It wasn't his anger that frightened me, for he didn't strike me as a violent man. It was the truth that I was afraid I'd have to run from.

He put a hand on the wall beside my head, his arm stiff and locked. His head dipped to shoulder level as he gazed dangerously down at me. The blonde locks that I had previously tucked behind his ear were now messily screening his face, making him look all that more angry. I didn't want him to look at me like that anymore. I wanted to take back everything I said and run, and before he could utter a single word, I was already trembling. Since when had I been such a wimp? Ok so I had always been a little afraid of him, and this made that old fear come rushing back into me, full force.

When he spoke, his words were calm, but there was an underlying fury that made them all the more scarier and sinister than if he had screamed them. "I'm not the one playing games. You claim that you like me and then turn around and try to seduce that Aussie. You claim you have feelings for me, and yet the only time I hear from you unless I show up on my own is when you have a problem or you're afraid. And then you seduce my brother, and you honestly think that I should be confiding in you?" His voice lowered to a whisper. But the lower it went, the more I realized how completely pissed off he was. Maybe he had been pissed off all along but just finally couldn't take it anymore. "If you want to be trusted, you have to earn it."

"I didn't seduce anybody!" I ducked under the arm and quickly moved toward the door, to afraid to look back at him. "Since you're feeling better, Eddie, you can find your own way home. I'm sure you can get a ride with your pals Yakov and Ciel. And one more thing... Don't you dare look at me and talk to me like everything is my fault again."

I stormed out of the office and slammed the door behind me. Making a scene wasn't my intent, I just wanted Eddie to know that he wasn't the only one pissed off. I stomped through the building toward the front doors... Ok so it was a bit of a scene. For some reason I felt the need to hide the fact that I was trembling and on the verge of tears, by making an extravagant show of temper. Denis and Ciel looked at each other with concern - and annoyance. One of them tried to ask me where I was going since neither of them thought me walking alone at night was a good idea, but I didn't exactly hear them so I kept going.

--

The walk home wasn't much of a walk home. Not only did I not know the way home on foot, but I got freaked out halfway down the block from Pasticcio so I ended up hopping on the metro, just barely catching the second last one. Of course you all must be surprised, but I did make it home in one piece. No attacks. No shadows jumping out at me. No night terrors. Just a quiet trip home. Although I made the mistake of thinking the day was over. This horrible Sunday had finally come to an end. Maybe it was thinking that way that jinxed me, but I was very wrong.

When I walk into the house, the kitchen light was on again. Dad must have been up late again preparing for his Phys Ed classes so I stepped out of my perpetually untied running shoes and walked through the living room and into the kitchen. But I wasn't met with what I had expected. Instead, my father was sitting there, his face streaked with tears as he chugged back what looked like his seventh beer.

Very confused, I approached him and took the beer out of his hands. "What's wrong? Did something happen?"

"Yeah... Ih shtar'ed ow a goo' day..." He was slurring his words so bad I could barely understand him. Sounded like he had far more beers than I had thought. So I went and poured him a large glass of ice cold water and helped him drink it before he continued. "The bar-b-que wah fun, an' I di'n know she wah mad a' me..."

"Mad at you? Who? Mom?" I frowned, tempted to smack him into talking normally. "Dad, tell me what's going on."

"She say... I don' love her, an' never di'... An' she wah righ'... She say she wan' a tsivorce..."

"tsivorce? Wha... Divorce?" My mouth gaped open when he nodded. It was no use getting a good reason out of him now and mom was probably sleeping so I turned to look at what he was writing. In messy printing were calculations of finances, and it looked like he was planning how much it would cost to get movers on short notice. "You've gotta be shitting me. Wait... Where are you gonna go?"

He shrugged and dropped his head on the table, spilling the water I had given him. "We goin' to your uncks a' mown royah."

That alarmed me even more. "Who's we?"

"You an' me... You go'ah come wif me, Ikeypoo. Becks is stayin' herrr... an' I don' wanna lose all of yas."

"Ah... Alright Dad." I hugged him, trying to put my own devastation aside in order to comfort him. I hadn't a clue that there was any problem with their marriage. I had never ever seen them argue so this was very unexpected and they had seemed perfectly fine earlier that day. But it worried me most of all how this was affecting my sister. Was she alright? "I'll come with you, Dad... I promise you won't lose me."

TBC... ... ...

A/N: I think I'll leave the second POV until chapter 11 though, lol, because I want to wait for AFF to come back before I start writing that chapter.