FicWad

Well I haven't posted anything on here for ages, so I thought I'd put this up, please tell me what you thing

"Are you certain?” Gerard asked me for the thousandth time. I nodded, fearing my voice would betray the terror wracking through me. Was I certain? I had no idea, all I knew was I had no other choice. He looked at me for a moment, as if trying to discern whether or not I was telling the truth. What conclusion he came to I’ll never know as, pausing only for a second, he then dragged his fingernail over his left wrist, its unnatural sharpness piercing his pale skin before splitting the fragile vein. For a moment he stared, as if the sight of his own blood somehow shocked him, then he slowly bought his wrist up and placed it into my mouth. “You must drink,” he whispered; so I did, relishing the sweet taste as the liquid slid down my throat. I could feel it rushing through my veins, changing every cell within my body, turning me into a vampire.

When I had leant forward to drink I had turned my head sideways, leaving my neck exposed an open. As Gerard’s mouth brushed against my throat I felt a familiar rush of emotions, before his gleaming fangs sunk into my skin and he began to feed.

The feeling was indescribable; words are not enough to explain that rush of pure bliss. I could hear my heart beating as it pumped the blood from my body to his, slowly allowing him to suck away my mortality. All at once I was that crimson droplet, flowing from myself into him, and then it was as if I was him; seeing the world though his eyes, seeing myself through his mind.

All at once I was hit with a rush of emotions, so many I wondered how a head could contain such thoughts and still retain a semblance of sanity. I was confused, angry, frustrated, frightened… I loathed myself for this monster I was, for all the deaths I had caused, all the misery I had bought about. I longed for death, for an end to this torment, but I couldn’t let go quite yet. For beneath all this pain there was something else; something sweet, something beautiful. There was love.

This mortal in front of me, who, at this very moment, I was changing into a beast like myself, filled my heart with something other than hatred. The soft tones in which he spoke, the way his eyes would light up whenever he smiled; these tiny things and so many others added up until I felt I would burst from desire. I had never wanted to hurt him, to corrupt him, to turn him into something like me: but how could I not? If I didn’t he would die, the disease slowly eating away at him until that precious heart stopped beating. I couldn’t let that happen. I tried to convince myself that it was for him, to save him, but really I was just being selfish. It was for me: I was the one who couldn’t let go, who couldn’t give him up. So instead I was damning him to an eternal life.

And the whole time I just longed to hold him. Instead of biting his slender neck I wanted to kiss it; to feel his smooth skin under my sensitive lips, to taste his soft mouth against mine. I wanted to run with him, hunt with him, then collapse into bed next to him. To run my hands over his fragile body, to hear him cry out my name in a burst of passion. Then to wake up with him, and see the impossible love in his eyes, reflecting my own foolish desires…

Abruptly Gerard pulled away, breaking the bond between us and I was thrust back into my own mind. But the world around me had changed; it was as if someone had taken off a blindfold I never realised I was wearing. All the colours seemed brighter, sharper; the white hospital bed practically gleamed in the faint illumination. I walked to the window, staring out at the full moon as it seemed to send ripples of light through the night sky. Beneath me people thronged through the city streets. I could hear their fast, hurried breaths, the blood pumping through them and suddenly desire shot through me, worse than anything I’d ever felt before. I wanted them, I wanted their blood, I needed it so badly; needed it flowing down my throat, pulsing through my veins, anything to satisfy this insatiable hunger within me.

I turned to run out the room, to get to those people, but Gerard was faster. He put one hand on each of my shoulders, forcing me to look at him.
“Come back to me,” he whispered sadly. And finally I saw him. I’d always thought he was attractive, but now he was beautiful. Each tiny detail of his face mesmerised me; his white skin, his dark eyes, his red lips still stained with my blood. I reached out and traced his soft cheek bone with my finger. At the direct skin to skin contact he shuddered a little. At first I thought I disgusted him, and then I suddenly remembered everything. All those thoughts, those emotions, they had been his. And that mortal he was so desperate for had been me.

“How long?” I murmured, keeping my hand pressed lightly against his face. For a moment his eyes widened in shock, before dilating again as he remembered his own transformation, all those years ago.
“Always he whispered and my heart swelled as I finally allowed myself to believe this was happening. “You?” he asked gently, moving a little closer until I couldn’t think, couldn’t speak, couldn’t breathe… I closed my eyes, welcoming the darkness that enveloped me, the peace it bought to my crazed mind.
“Forever,” I managed to murmur before soft lips descended on mine and I lost myself completely.

For a moment I remained still, lost in this strange new world I’d found myself in, until Gerard’s arm snaked round my waist, bringing our bodies closer together. For a second I hesitated, before opening my mouth slightly and gently sucking on his bottom lip. I ran my fingers through his smooth, dark hair, just as I’d always longed to, lowing the way he shivered beneath my touch. Finally I plucked up the courage to run my tongue over his lips, for they parted allowing me to explore the sweet territory of his mouth. My heart was on fire; burning with the agony of my transformation, burning with the joy of him loving me. But it was worth it, the pain, the fear, everything. After all, eternity doesn’t seem so long in the arms of the one you love.