What To Do?
Kevin and Brooke left to go out on a date. “So do you think that they’re fully back together now?” I asked Joe. “I really hope so, the way they’ve been acting has really gotten on my nerves. It’s like a just want to smoosh their faces together and make them kiss.” he laughed. “That would be a funny sight to see.” I grinned. “I wonder what had happened between them to make it all weird for a while.” I bit my nails as I always did when I was nervous or thinking. “I don’t know, maybe they just got in a fight.” Joe shrugged.
I grabbed Joe’s hand and pulled him upstairs with me. “What is this all about?” he asked, grinning. “I wanted to do this without being watched.” I kissed him softly. “That’s a good reason.” he smirked. “I figured it was, but really I just wanted to talk.” I walked out on my balcony. “Thanks for tricking me.” he followed me. “I didn’t trick you per say, I lured you.” I flashed him a smile.
“So what did you want to talk about?” he asked putting his arms on the railing. “I don’t know, I just wanted to talk.” I set my arms beside his. “You don’t know what you want to talk about? That’s a first.” he teased. I rolled my eyes, “Ok I may have something in mind.” I looked up at the sky. “And that something would be?” he questioned. “Well, I was thinking we could talk about us. I mean we don’t usually talk about our relationship, but…” I stopped before I started rambling.
Joe looked up at the stars for a moment and then looked back at me, “Alright.” he nodded. “Joe, where do you see us going?” I asked a little nervously. I was so scared to ask a question that so out there. “Well I see us getting married and then having this fantastic fairy-tale life.” he smiled, “With a few bad things thrown in of course.” he added. “So you see us getting married?” I watched as the moonlight hit his eyes. “Are you kidding me? Of course we’re going to get married!” he looked shocked. “Aubrey, I couldn’t see myself with anyone else but you.” his face softened. I searched his eyes for a moment, only seeing honesty. I smiled, “That’s exactly what I was hoping.” I kissed him.
I looked up at the moon, so full and bright. Then I noticed Joe staring at me, “What?” I raised an eyebrow. “You just look so stunning.” he intertwined his fingers with mine. “I think that you may have eye problems.” I laughed. “And why is that?” he spoke in a cocky tone. “Because you seem to think I’m beautiful.” I answered. “I think that you have it backwards. I think that YOU have the eye problem, either that or you have been looking in a different mirror.” he inched closer to me. “Is that so?” I could feel his breath on my neck. “Yea.” he whispered. I felt my heartbeat quicken, his lips touched mine and I felt my knees get weak. Somehow he always managed to be able to make me weak.
“You’re…you’re what?” Kevin stuttered out. “I’m pregnant.” I put my head down. His mouth slightly hung open and I could tell that he held his breath. Kevin was in shock. “Kevin…please say something.” I mumbled. “I…you…we…you’re…” he spoke gibberish. I didn’t know what to say and obviously he didn’t either.
Neither one of us actually ate our food. “We have to tell everyone.” he spoke breaking the silence. “When?” I asked. “Soon.” he replied. “Kevin, I think that before we tell anyone else about it, we should talk about it.” I suggested. “Ok.” he sighed, I could tell this wasn’t a subject he wanted to speak about.
“Kevin, what we did. Do you think it was wrong?” I asked knowing that yes would be the answer, but secretly hoping that he had wanted it. “I don’t know. It was wrong of me to do that, but…” he paused, unable to think of the right words. “It wasn’t all your fault, I didn’t exactly resist.” I sighed. “Brooke, I shouldn’t of started it.” he shook his head. I wasn’t sure what to say to that.
We decided that we should leave so that we could talk a little bit more privately. Kevin paid for the food even though we ate none of it. It was cold outside and I could feel goose bumps appearing on my arms. I climbed into his car and turned the heater on.
“Kevin, what happened the other night was both of our faults, we both made the mistake. You can’t just take all of blame, I won’t let you.” I looked over at him. “It doesn’t matter now anyway.” he shook his head. “What do you think that we should do?” I waited for his answer. “I don’t know…” he exhaled. “Do you want to keep the baby?” I asked meekly. “Do you?” he looked at me. “Kind of, I don’t think I could bare giving it away, but what do you want?” I bit the inside of me cheek. “Whatever you do.” he touched his hand on mine.
We sat in silence for a few moments. “Brooke, I still love you. You know that right?” his faced was hard to read. “Yea, I do.” I spoke softly. “What are we going to do?” I felt tears come. He paused before he spoke, choosing his words, “We’ll do this thing. We can do it.” his face was determined, but his words seemed more for himself than me.
At that moment was so confused and unsure at what to do I barely noticed that he had started the car. “Why?” I mumbled to myself. “What?” he looked over at me. “Why? Why did this all happen?” I felt the tears coming once again. “I don’t know, just a stupid heat of the moment decision.” he sighed. “How the hell did we manage to screw up this bad Kevin?” I started crying. “Brooke it’s ok.” he tried to comfort me but his words weren’t even the slightest bit helpful. “It’s not ok! Nothing’s ok now!” I started getting louder.
I felt the car slow down and pull over. We were in a parking lot behind the skating rink he had taken me to on our first date. He got our and opened the door for me, “Come on. We need to talk some more.” he helped me out. I instantly wrapped my arms around him and cried into his chest. “Kevin, I thought that everything was going to get better and then this happened! What will everyone think of us now? What about when the news finds out?” I sobbed. “I-I don’t know Brooke, I just don’t. All I know is that I love you and we have to do this together.” he put his finger under my chin so he could look in my eyes. My bottom lip quivered as I cried once again.
For what seemed like an eternity I cried while Kevin held me close. How he was managing to stay this strong I wasn’t quite sure. I pulled away and Kevin wiped away the tears on my cheeks with his thumbs. “How are you staying this strong?” I asked, my voice shaky. “Believe me, it’s only on the outside that I’m staying strong.” he sighed. It was then that I looked in his eyes and could honestly see that he was just as terrified as I was, just as scared, just as unsure.
“Brooke, look at me.” he tipped my chin up softly. “What.” I sniffed. “I know that this is something that we aren’t ready for, but I promise you that I will be there. There is nothing that could stop me.” he looked in my eyes and then kissed me softly. I put my hands to his face, pulling him closer. This was something I really wasn’t prepared for, but maybe I could do it if I had him with me.
I pulled away slowly. “Now we have to figure out how to tell them.” he sighed. Telling all of this was probably the worst part of all. “Do we just tell them straight-forward?” I asked. “I don’t know, but have to tell them.” he looked up at the sky as if he looking there for the answers. “I think we should tell them all at once.” I thought aloud. “You know, so that we don’t have to keep telling people.” I finished. He nodded, but said nothing. I put a hand on his arm. I knew that he was hurting inside far worse than what I could see, but I wasn’t sure what to do about it.
If this all hurt me I couldn’t imagine what he was feeling. I mean, he was one of the most famous people in the world and now that could all be taken away. He was supposed to be a role model and a gentleman, which of course I knew was how he really was, but how could everyone else know that now that this had happened. What would they think when they found out that he had gotten his seventeen-year-old girlfriend pregnant?
“Kevin, we should get home.” I said softly. “Yea.” he nodded slowly. We got back into his car and he started it up. It was silent all the way home; there was just nothing more we could say. I put one hand on the side of my waist and noticed that it had gotten slightly bigger. I was one month pregnant…a whole month…
The Tahoe pulled slowly into the driveway. It was already midnight, but luckily no one was up. I opened the door and got out of the car. Kevin, as usual, opened the front door for me. “Thanks.” I mumbled and walked in.
We did as we had done for the past month and went to our own rooms, with no goodnight kiss or hug. I took a quick shower, hoping to wash the stress away; not that it worked. My pajamas felt better than the jeans and the tight t-shirt I had one. I crawled into my bed and looked up at the blank ceiling. I felt so alone and so confused. My room felt cold; though I knew that it wasn’t cold at all.
I couldn’t sleep like this, there was no way I could. I flipped the covers off my body and walked over to the door. The hallway was empty and the house was dark; everyone was asleep. I looked at Kevin’s door for a moment and then knocked three times as quietly as I could. For a couple moments I waited and then the door came open. Kevin had on his favorite plaid pajama pants. “You ok?” he asked in a sleepy tone. “Can I sleep with you tonight?” I asked. “Yea come on.” he nodded and got out of the doorway. I stepped in his room.
“Kevin, sorry to just barge in.” I spoke subtly. He turned around and walked back over to me. “Don’t be sorry, it’s been hell not having you with me every night.” he gently put his hand on my cheek. I smiled weakly, “Thanks, it has been for me too.” I hugged him, letting his arms drape over me. “We’ll make it through this.” he kissed my cheek lightly.
Sleeping next to him was wonderful; I had missed it so much. Even with that in mind, I still couldn’t sleep because I knew what we would have to tell the rest of them tomorrow.