Past My Chem get a lesson in babies and in the present Lyn returns to New Jersey
‘What on earth are you reading? Ray asked Gerard as he seated himself across the table.
‘Ah this stupid baby book’ Gerard said closing it and flinging it across the table ‘I can’t get to any of those child educations classes so I thought I’d read up and see what its all about but it all seems so practical and you don’t get to practice by reading. I mean it tells you how to hold a baby but I’ve never actually held one before.’
‘It’s not that hard’ Ray said picking up the book and flicking though the pages.
‘I just know I’m going to mess this up, I’ll be all awkward and retarded around the baby.’ He sighed ‘I just want Cheyenne to be proud of me you know’
‘I got an idea’ Ray said seriously. ‘Get the others I’ll be ready in about an hour.’
‘Were you going?’ Gerard asked but Ray rushed off the bus not giving an answer.
‘Alright ladies’ Ray spoke quietly addressing his band mates nearly an hour after he spoke to Gerard ‘welcome to your one and only Child Education Class.’
‘How comes I have to be paired with Bob?’ Mikey whined ‘I don’t feel like I’m in a loving relationship with him.’
‘Not all babies are made in a loving relationships Mikey’ Ray said patting his friends head ‘so bite your tongue and get on with it.’
‘Now lets imagine that Mikey and Frank are in their third trimesters’ Ray said ‘their stomachs will be at their biggest, an indication that the baby will be coming very soon.’
‘I’m so big I feel like I’m going to burst’ Frank said rubbing the cushion under his t-shirt ‘I just want it out of me.’
‘Me too’ Mikey said joining in the role play.
‘Shut up’ Bob said hitting Mikey’s cushion belly with his fist.
‘Don’t do that’ Mikey gasped ‘you see what you’ve done Toro, you’ve paired me with an abusive monster I fear for my child’s life.’
‘Bob, be nice’ Ray said giving him a look ‘we’re doing this for a good reason. Now let’s pretend that the baby is coming, you’re at the hospital, Mikey and Frank is in labour. What as partners, Gerard and Bob can you do to help?’
‘Fluff their pillows’ Bob shouted as Mikey groaned loudly beside him, rubbing his oversized stomach ‘erm…sing ‘em a song.’
‘Good Bob’ Ray said trying not to shake his head in despair ‘Gerard?’
‘Erm I can hold her hand and encourage her to breathe’
‘Excellent’ Ray said ‘now Bob, Gerard get behind Mikey and Frank, hook your arms under their armpits and hold their hands. Frank and Mikey are going to pretend to have a contraction and it’s your job to support them and help them through the pain. Ready? GO!’
‘Oh ow ow ow’ Frankie cried squeezing Gerard’s hands as hard as he could
‘That’s its baby’ Gerard said his face contorted in pain as his fingers became crushed between Franks
‘Bob support me’ Mikey cried his body limp in against Bob’s chest ‘I’m in pain. Ray, Bob’s not supporting me’
‘Bob just do it’ Ray snapped
‘Fine’ Bob said rolling his eyes and getting into position.
‘Oh my you’re hands are so callousy’ Mikey complained as they locked hands.
‘And you think yours are baby soft?’ Bob retorted
‘Now the contraction is over, breath ladies’ Ray said ‘Inhale and exhales with three sharp blows. Excellent Frankie’ Ray praised ‘well done Gerard for supporting Frank’
‘Thank you honey’ Frank said turning his head to Gerard and batting his eye lids.
‘Anything for you mother of my child’ Gerard said making them both laugh.
‘Focus ladies next contraction is coming and pus…’
‘Hey you guys I just came to…’ Worm stopped short by the door as his eyes landed on the band members, they all stopped, their eyes wide with shock at being found out. Frank not noticing the interruption continued to push his imaginary baby out of his womb.
‘I can’t do it Gee, it’s too hard’ Frank acted ‘I hate you. How could you do this to me?’
‘I’ll-I’ll just come back later’ Worm said walking backwards out the door closing it behind him.
‘Wow that was embarrassing for you guys’ Ray laughed ‘Let’s move on shall we?’
Present September 2012
‘So what you’re saying?’ Frankie said clearing his dry throat ‘is that the problems that we’re having conceiving are down to me.’
‘Yes’ Dr Schwartz said with a definite nod of his head ‘you have Oligozoospermia ‘
‘Pardon the pun but come again’ Frank said ‘and in English this time’
‘You Mr Iero have a low sperm count’ Dr Schwartz said ‘the testing we done on you revealed that your sperm count is 20 million spermatozoa per one ml of ejaculate. Erm in simple terms imagine you’re putting sugar in your tea…’
‘Coffee’ Frank interrupted
‘Fine let’s imagine that you’re putting sugar in your coffee and most people put a teaspoon sized amount in their cup, you Frank are only managing to put a baby spoon amount in the cup.’
‘I see’ Frank said glumly ‘so what are the chances of my wife and me getting pregnant?’
‘They’re slim at this point but not impossible it can happen’ Dr Schwartz said ‘but improvement would help your chances greatly and there are a lot of things that you can do personally to increase your chances of conception, they’re also a range of enhancement pills I can prescribe.’
‘Right ok’ Frank said studying his hands ‘when can I get these pills?’
‘Lets try it the natural way first, you’re still a young man your sperm count can be improved with a healthier diet and cut backs of, let’s say, undesirable products. Here is a booklet on your condition, read it, make a few changes and we’ll review in a few months in that time you should have sex regularly too just because the count is low doesn’t mean it’s impossible’
‘Thanks’ Frank said accepting the booklet and standing up.
‘Listen Frank’ Dr Schwartz said ‘This is the most common form of infertility in men, its nothing to be ashamed of and its nothing that can’t be fixed. Just take the advice given to you and things should be fine.’
Frank nodded and left without another word, he never imagined it was him that was the cause of why they were the only couple in their group that were childless. With his head hung low he went home to his wife to tell the news.
‘Ok’ Ray said ‘listen up we’re in for part two of the education class ‘in front of you are wipes, a diaper, a diaper sack and some power and most importantly a baby. It’s your job to change the old diaper and replace it with the new one. You have ninety seconds and your time starts…NOW!’
‘Shit’ Gerard mumbled ripping the tape off the old diaper as the baby doll lay in front of him he tore open the other strip and pulled the diaper off tossing it on the floor.
‘No smoking around the baby’ Frank said ripping the cigarette that dangled from Gerard’s lips and handing it to Ray who didn’t look impressed
‘It’s a doll’ Gerard growled as he struggled to open the packet of wipes.
‘It’s our son’ Frankie said stuffing the old diaper in to the scented diaper bag ‘Little Frankie junior’
‘Mikey what the fuck are you doing?’ Bob asked as Mikey frantically moved the dolls legs up and down, side to side.
‘I making it more realistic’ Mikey said ‘babies don’t lie still you know.’
‘You’re making us lose’ Bob cried pushing Mikey and making him fall over.
‘Oh look you’re being abusive again’ Mikey stated ‘nothing I’m not used to from you’
‘Shut up and help, hand me the clean diaper you moron’
‘Moron! I’m the mother of your child if it wasn’t for me you wouldn’t even have a doll’
‘This doll is Asian!’ Bob cried ‘so I know it’s not mine but I still take care of it.’
‘Are you implying I’ve had an affair’ Mikey gasped ‘How dare you?’
‘Done’ Gerard shouted as he fastened the last strip of the dolls diaper he picked up his plastic baby and rested it on his shoulder rubbing its back.
‘High five’ Frank said his hands ready in the air. ‘In your face’s Bryar’s
‘We’re finished too’ Bob said holding up his doll before handing it to Mikey who cradled it ‘in your face Way’s’
‘Both teams did well’ Ray said his hands massaging his head wondering if this exercise was a good idea. ‘Both teams passed’
‘Cool what’s next?’ Frank said excitedly ‘I’m hyped, we’re going to be excellent parents.’
Present September 2012 – Arizona
‘Alright Paige’ Lyn said kneeling down so she was level with her daughter ‘I’m going on a little trip and I want you to be good for daddy whilst I’m gone.’
‘Where are you going?’ Paige asked licking the ice cream that Marcus had bought her.
‘To New Jersey to look for an old friend of mine and daddy’s I’ll be back soon.’
‘When?’ Paige asked her brown eyes wide an innocent as she tucked in to the ice cream that was a sure fire way to distract her attention from the fact her mother was going on a trip.
‘Soon I’ll only be gone a few days and I’ll bring you back something real nice.’
‘Cool’ Paige said ‘I like surprises’
‘I know you do’ Lyn said pulling her daughter in close ‘mummy loves you’
‘Paige loves you’ Paige said smiling at her own joke.
‘Come on I’ll walk you to the car.’ Marcus said taking Lyn’s arm as Paige headed to the living room, no doubt to watch the Disney Channel.
Once outside Lyn got into the cab and wound down the window ‘you take care of her’
‘Like she’s my own’ Marcus said with a small smile
‘She IS your own’ Lyn said reaching out and touching his stubbly cheek
‘Then why are you doing this?’ he asked ‘stay here and lets forget the whole thing.’
‘I wish we could but she’s going to keep asking and if we don’t sort it now one day she’ll go off on her own and find him and can you imagine the can of worms that would open up. For all we know she’s got a half brother or sister out there, we can let them meet like that or have him find out that he’s got a daughter that he didn’t even know about. Can you imagine what that would be like?’
‘Yes I do’ he said
‘I know this is hard for you’ Lyn said ‘But it’s the right thing to do’
‘I know’ he whispered ‘I just wish it didn’t have to be done’
‘Me too’ Lyn said pulling his face closer to hers and giving him a loving kiss ‘I’ll see you in a couple days. Be good and look after our baby.’
‘I promise’ he said he walked to the driver’s side and handed the driver enough cash to get Lyn to the airport, he then stepped back and watched his wife drive away whilst he held back his tears.
Ok so Bob and Mikey you answered four questions correctly, if you argued less I would have had more time to ask you the questions. Frank and Gerard this is the last round, you have thirty seconds on the clock and your time starts…now. Team way how many trimesters in a pregnancy?’
‘Three’ Gerard screamed
Correct. What is it called when a baby is born feet first?
‘Retarded’ Frank screamed
‘No you idiot’ Gerard cried ‘its breach you ass, the answer is breach’
‘I’m sorry I can only accept your first answer’ Ray smirked
‘Sorry’ Frank said his face apologetic.
‘Moron’ Gerard spat throwing Frank a death look.
‘Next question ‘name one two of the symptoms of pregnancy’
‘Cravings’ Frank shouted
‘Morning sickness’Gerard quickly added
Excellent! Name three different types of contraception.’
‘Pulling out before I cum’ Frank said seriously
‘What NO!’ That’s not contraception’ Gerard said slapping his band mate in his head
‘Really? Shit I better call some of my exes’ Frank grinned
‘Next question ‘what is the medical term for when a woman gives birth to eight babies at once?’
‘Octobabies’ Gerard said ‘shit no, fuck that’s wrong.’
‘Octuplets’ Frank said ‘That would be so fucking cool, just shoot them out one after the other, ping, ping, ping, ping, ping, ping…you know what I mean, fucking awesome’ he said
‘I can only take you’re first answer’ Ray said holding back a laugh ‘next question how would you test the temperature of a baby’s bath water’
‘Elbow!’ Gerard screamed ‘you stick your elbow in it.’
‘Correct’ Ray shouted ‘and your time is up gentlemen. Ok at the end of the game with the most wins from each test the winners are…TEAM WAY!!’
‘YES’ Gerard said high fiving Frank who gave Mikey and Bob the finger ‘we won’
‘Who cares?’ Bob huffed ‘it’s a stupid baby game and we’re not having babies.’
‘Don’t be a sore loser Bryar’ Frankie grinned ‘you win some, you learn some.’
‘You ready to be a dad?’ Mikey asked, Frank in all his haste nearly opened his mouth to respond, he closed it quickly realising that the question wasn’t aimed at him. He wasn’t about to become a father despite the amount of work he had put into the last few months, it wasn’t his baby it was Gerard’s.
‘Yeah I think so’ Gerard laughed ‘Toro said it’s a natural thing so I’m hoping I’ll fall into it.’
‘You will’ Ray said ‘you and Frank both did really well today’
‘What about me?’ Mikey cried ‘I tried really hard but it’s difficult to be a good parent when your partners abusive.’
‘Yeah Frank did do really well’ Gerard said ignoring his brother as Ray did ‘You’ll make a great father when it’s your turn.’
Frank smiled before turning away, he didn’t want them to see the sadness in his eyes, little did they know this time could’ve been and the way he felt should have been his turn and it broke his heart to be reminded that it wasn’t.
Present: September 2012
‘Oh thank God’ Jamia cried launching herself at Frank as they say face to face on the living room sofa.
‘What?’ Frank exclaimed ‘I just told you I’m the reason why we don’t have a baby and you’re happy because…’
‘I’m not happy’ Jamia said kissing his face ‘I’m just relieved it’s not me. I’ve read about infertility in women and it’s so much worse then it is for you and I was so scared that I was the cause but now I know it’s you and not me I feel so relieved. Your problem can be fixed so much easier then if there was a problem with me.’
‘Oh’ Frank said unsure of whether to be happy or not for her.
‘We can fix this’ Jamia said stroking his cheek ‘we’ll do everything the booklets says and of course what Dr Schwartz says and eventually we’ll have our baby. Oh I’m so excited, we know the problem and it’s an easy solution. I’m so happy.’
‘Me too’ Frank said smiling although it didn’t reach his eyes.
‘I’m going to go call my mom she’ll be pleased, you know she’s dying for a grand child we can tell her we’re one step closer.’
‘Is it ok if I shoot round to see Gerard?’ he asked ‘tell him our developments.’
‘I don’t see why not’ Jamia said kissing his lips ‘don’t stay too long, its late and I want a piece of you before the night is through’ she laughed
‘You got it’ Frank said getting up and pulling her up with him ‘I’ll be back before you know it.’
Once outside Frank couldn’t start the car fast enough. He had tried and failed to find a reason to go and see Gerard for the last few days, sure he could just drop by for the sake of it but that would get tired after a while. But he had a reason now and as he sped towards his best friend’s home he hoped to God that Cheyenne was there too, he had news to tell Gerard but she was the real reason he was going.
Frank groaned as his phone rang vibrating on his head ‘yeah’ he said his eyes still closed as he held the phone to his ear.
‘Frank it’s me’ Cheyenne puffed
‘What’s up baby?’ he said trying to wake his mind up as his body still slept
‘My water broke’ she said
‘Aw! Ok I’ll fix it when I get home’ he muttered
‘What? No’ Cheyenne cried ‘Frank wake up, where is Gerard?’
‘I am awake’ he said ‘he’s sleeping somewhere, like we should be.’
‘Frank!’ Cheyenne cried in desperation ‘listen to me the baby is coming.’
Present: September 2012
Lyn drove around her old neighbour hood in the car she rented, she considered getting a cab but wanted to be alone so didn’t mind spending the extra cash, besides she was going to be there for four days so she’s be driving around a lot. She had already driven past her old house and as she passed it she smiled. There were some very happy memories in that house, most of them x-rated but pleasant none the less, it was a joy to see that whoever lived there now was taking good care of it, the lawn was cut nicely and new windows had peen put in, it looked better and that made her happy. She had been driving around for about an hour going past all her old haunts, restaurants and café’s that she had eaten at, bars that she had got drunk at, the Way residence, Amber’s house which was now boarded up, Ray’s and what she hoped was still Christa’s place. So much had changed in the last five years and she wondered what had happened to the people she used to know and wondered if she would find out whilst she was in town. As she headed back to her hotel room, she could feel a headache coming on, she needed some rest her thoughts were suffocating her mind and she needed to switch off. After all she had set a massive task for herself the next day she had to find Frank Iero.
A/N Sorry I’ve been away so long my loves, but I’m back. Hope you’re all well. T.b.h this chapter isn’t all that great but I’ll heat it back up with the next one for sure. Thanks for all the R&R I love it. Til next time. Reign xx