Frank and Gerard try to get over the news. But how will they tell the others?
I don't remember much after that. But in a different sense I remember everything.
"I have cancer" The words rang out across the deserted beach, across the ocean, reaching the countries on the other side. Everyone in Belleville, New Jersey, America, the world must have heard it. Gerard Arthur Way had cancer. It wasn't possible. The one person I looked up to more than anyone in the world was dying, slowly but surely, Gerard was dying.
"No!" I gasped, choking on my own tears, "No! NOOOOO!" I screamed now, so everyone would hear my devastation, my hurt, my loss of life itself. It seemed so stupid, shouting no, so basic, simple, idiotic. But that's how I felt. I was so alone, now that Gerard was on limited time. I wanted to run. I wanted to run as far as I could. I didn't want Gerard to see me like this. But I knew he needed me. He needed me like I needed him.
"I don't understand.." But of course I did. I understood all too well. Gerard was buying his time, buying his life. "When will we tell the g-g-g-guys?" I whipered.
"I don't know. I just had to tell you. I couldn't leave you without knowing. I can't handle them right now. And Mikey. God, Mikey. I don't think I'm going to be able to tell him. No. I will. I can fight this. If I can fight my own temptation to drink, self harm and take drugs, I can fight cancer." He was so strong I couldn't believe it.
"I know you can Gee. I know you can." I sobbed into his shoulder.
Then the thing I least, and most, expected happened. Gerard started to cry. Softly at first but soon his body was racked with sobs and my head was getting wet. I didn't care. I needed to be with somebody and so did Gerard. We sat and cried for hours under our tree.
"LynZ!" I managed to gasp, remembering that Gerard and I had wives and that they would need to find out somehow.
"Bandit..." Gerardd sobbed. Or that's what I think it was, he was crying to hard for me to hear right.
"We'll make it through. You've got me, the guys, the wives. I won't let it take you Gee. Because when you're gone, I'll be right behind you." It was true. Without him I wouldn't be able to live. He was my best friend. I needed him more than I needed Jamia, which was a hell of a lot. If Gerard died I'd die. But where'd that leave Cherry, Lily and Jamia. Alone.
"Thank you. Please, help me through this. It'll be over soon." Said Gerard, crying a little less now.
"How long do you have?" I asked. Cheesey as this question was, I needed to know. He was dying and when he did, I'd go with him.
"I don't know. No more than a year. No way of us telling. Maybe tomorrow, maybe next month...." He left that hanging in the air.
We sat there until the sun went down, then we lay in the warm night air, looking at the stars.
"Face it, we've had good times. Every day of my life was worth living, and worth dying for. Even the hard days, because on those days I still had you and Mikey.
I'm in a revolutionary band, my best friend is Frank Iero, I'm married to LynZ and I have a beautiful daughter, My brother is Mikey Way, we have like a billion fans and Ray, Bob, you and Mikey are the best friends I could ask for. Even just one of those days in my life is enough to keep me going forever. And when I die, let fans attened my funeral, cauase they know me as much as they know their friends if they love us like we love them. It's so worth it Frank. SO, so worth it..."
I fell asleep listening to Gerard that night. Not because he bored me. Because his voice was so soothing, so calming, so hypnotic, that it made you drift off even in the most destressing day of your life.