drawings parks and trains
Tuesday was one of my two days off. Emma wanted me to go shopping with her, I didn’t mind. Not my favourite thing in the world but I could think of worse things to be doing.
We went into Clair’s, Animal, Blue Banana and Next but I dragged her into HMV and I bought half the CD’s I wanted. I also bought some new jeans and a Green Day t-shirt. From one shop I thought that was pretty good.
We got hungry and decided to go to Starbucks for a coffee.
As I walked through the door, I froze. He was there. Just sitting in the corner with a caramel frappachino on the table as he scribbled on a scrunched up piece of paper.
This was it, I would go and confront him. I'll order my coffee first. So I stand in line and order myself a caramel frappachino except mine is made with cream, not coffee.
When we have our coffees, I walk with Emma to a table by the windows so I can see the guy. I stand up with my coffee and tell Emma “I’ll be back now. Promise.”
And I walk to his table and sit down as confidently as I possibly could. He doesn’t notice so I cough loudly.
He covered the picture he was drawing as he jumped at my voice. “Umm, can I hel-...” he cut himself short. “help you?” he continued.
“I was the guy from the cafe yesterday. Frank, remember?” I spoke confidently.
“Yeh, I remember.” He said shyly.
“Can I look?” I pointed to his art work. “You're pretty good.”
“It’s still rough but yeh here you go.” He said uncovering it and handing it to me. “Can I ask why you’re here?”
I couldn’t say anything. It was the park where I last met Gerard. The tall, leafy green trees, the gloomy grey of concrete, the grass, short but wild and the two tiny buildings in the background in front of the steep sloping bank.
“Frank?” Gerard (I'm sure it was him now) interrupted my daydreaming.
“I guess I'm just speechless. I love the grounds keepers huts at the back.” I rushed and excuse so I could leave before I raped him right there.
“Frankie!” he called after me, but I ignored it as tears swelled in my eyes at the sound of my old nick-name.
“What was all that about?” Emily asked when I sat back down.
“Just someone I thought I should say hi to.” I replied, still a little stunned from the realisation that I had finally found Gee again.
“Well what did he give you?” she pointed at the sheet of paper I still held in my hand.
“Oh, I’ll give it back.” I got up and walked over quickly noticing that he was staring at me.
“Sorry, Gee I forgot to give the park ba-, I mean picture back to you.” And I returned to Emily.
We spent the rest of the day in some shops then going back on the train, but it was mostly her clothes and I didn’t buy anymore.
“What’s wrong Frank?” she asked quietly on the train home.
“It’s nothing. I was just thinking.”
“About that guy.” It wasn’t a question “Frank are you seeing someone else?”
“No, of course not. You know I could never do such a thing. I will stand being called emo, gay or fag, but you know I am not a whore.”
“I know Frank, but you seem different since you saw him yesterday. You’re quiet, and you are never quiet.” She gave me a stern look.
“I know but it's just, well, that guy was Gerard.” I confessed eventually.
“Who? I don't know a Gerard, I know a Jared, but it was defiantly not him.”
“No.” I said in a pissed off tone. “Gerard, as in my ex-boyfriend that my parents dragged me away from because they’re motherfucking homophobes.”
“Well, I'm so sorry I didn’t remember that. Maybe you should go running back to him like the fuckin childish knob you are!” She screamed at me and got up to move to the other end of the train.