Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > This Is how We'll Be, Oh Glory.

I've gone for too long living like I'm not Alive

by xcandix 1 Reviews

so i know i didnt write anything for the story for a while, but i've been going pretty steady with it now. Lemme know if you like where its going. I love reviews and they always make me wanna write...

Category: Panic! At The Disco - Rating: R - Genres: Angst,Drama,Romance - Characters:  - Published: 2008/04/12 - Updated: 2008/04/13 - 1036 words

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Maddy's Pov.


We exited the club from the back and were instantly welcomed by the brisk New York air. It was a bit chilly. We started strolling down the side walk block by block, neither of us really knowing what to say.


"So..." Brendon started, " are you planning on producing any new bands any time soon?"


"Uh, no not really. Well, not an entire album. I'm just doing a track or two for cobra starship."


"So, your schedule is pretty much free?"


"Yes, why?" I have to admit I'm skeptic to whatever Brendon is leading on to. I know when his wheels start turning. There's like a spark in his eye.


"Well you see, we were playing a show in Vegas and this guy gave us a demo cd of the band he sang for. We took a listen to it and they are pretty good. Pete is thinking of signing them, but he hasn't found someone to produce them yet. Would you want to do it?"


"Um. I'm not sure. That means i have to go to Vegas for at least 3 months and i haven't even heard them."


"I have their cd with me right now. They are worth your time I swear!"


"haha people have to be worthy of my time now?"


"I dont know. If they had to be would I be worthy of your time?"


"of course!" I laughed, " so what's the name of this band anyway?"


"The Cab."


"I like it, it's different and it had an interesting ring to it. You said you had their cd right?"


"Yeah," he started to fiddle in his jacket pocket for it," I'll just give it to you and you cant get back to me whenever you get a chance to listen to it."


"Nonsense, my house is a block away. Let's just go crank it up and piss off my neighbors!"


"You sure?"


"Yeah, i can give you the GRAND TOUR!" i joked and Brendon smiled.



Brendon's pov.


For once in the past four months i felt a bit of happiness. I got that feeling that i could only get when i was around Maddy and it was such an addictive feeling. Ever since we stopped talking i felt upset all the time. I was having withdraws from her presence. This was a fix i was dying for. As we neared what she pointed out to be her house she began to fiddle in her purse for her keys.


"Damn i hate big purses," she swore, " you can never find a damn thing in them!" After she finally found the key she pushed it into the lock and opened up the one of the double doors to her her foyer. "Sorry it's so dark," she apologized.


"It's fine." I assured her.



"Just gotta feel around for the light switch," she said as she made her way to her destination and turned on the hallway light. Ella came pitter-pattering in, making tapping sounds as her paws pranced around the hardwood floor. "Hi babes," Maddy smiled.


"She's gotten a bit bigger since the last time i saw her."


"Yep, but she is still a tiny little thing."


"She's cute," i declared while bending down to pet her. Maddy hung her leather jacket on the railing of the steps.


"Want me to take your jacket?" she asked politely.


"Sure, thanks." I replied while taking of my jacket and handing it to her.


"Let me just put Ella out back and then we can listen to the cd."


"Alright, sounds good." I smiled while she lead Ella to the back door to let her outside. She came back with a smile.


"Alright lets hear this band you've been raving about."


"Here you go," i said as i passed her the cd. She placed it in the entertainment unit on the wall. i took a seat on one of the couches. She pressed play and sat down on the couch opposite from me. The beginning of the song began to play as Alex sang out the Oh's in the beginning of I'll Run.


I can see it your eyes,
you're scared.
All these things they force you to do aren't fair.



She closed her eyes and listened intently to the music. I couldn't help but take the opportunity to look at her and take every part of her in that i possibly could. I was so cute how she tapped her index finger on her knee and her foot at the same time, and how she lightly bobbed her head when the beat got stronger.

Believe me and don't think twice
And don't leave me or say goodbye
Believe me, believe me tonight

If you have a little faith in me
Have a little faith in me
Have a little faith in me
If you have a little faith in me


The song ended as the piano lead the outro. She opened her eyes again and pressed the off button. The system turned off and we sat in silence for a couple of seconds as she pondered for a bit.


"So..." I asked in anticipation.


"I love em'" she smiled. I let out a breath. "They've truly got this unique sound, ya know?"


"Trust me, I know."



"It so cool that you actually took the time to listen to them. It was a very sweet thing to do." She smiled.


"Maddy?"


"Yeah."



"Can i ask you a question?"


"Sure, Bren what's up?"


"Did you ever," i let out an exasperated breath nervous to answer the question. She looked at me intently, concerned," Did you ever think about me, about us, over the past few months?"


"Everyday," she muttered, " I didn't just forget you, or Ryan, I just kept myself busy all day and then i came home and was faced with all of this confusion and indecision."


"Do you still love me?" I asked hoping with every bit of hope that she would tell me yes. She just looked up at me and then back down.


"Of course i still love you, despite what you did. I know you are an amazing person and i don't think I'll ever be able to let go of what we had."
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