Sounds like an interesting premise. I hate to tell you this but you broke rule number 5 three times in the first paragraph. That is something that really throws most readers right away. I skimmed through the rest and my eye caught several more spelling errors. Your phrasing was fine and your vocabulary was impressive but if things aren't spelled right, the reader can miss your meaning. Find a beta reader you trust and ply her with virtual chocolate so that she will catch them before you post. Keep writing! (There can never be enough Cap'n Jack fic!)