Review for Harry Potter and the Soliders in the Shadows

Harry Potter and the Soliders in the Shadows

(#) Cateagle 2008-07-04

It sounds like they've got a much better shot now at proper training. I wonder, though, if they'll be dealing with a supporting or a controlling Dumbledore? The first is bearable, the second could, conceivably, lead to a major change of school to Beauxbatons or such.

One thing I did notice, that grated on my sensibilities, was that your verb tenses jumped back and forth between present and past tense. Certain passages in the present tense give the "feel" of a slightly fleshed out outline.

Author's response

I guess you could say they are gonna get a more formal training to add to what they already know. Everyone will know exactly where Dumbledore sits in my story in a few chapters.

I am sorry about the verb tenses I used to have a friend who would look over that to make sure I was not jumpping all over the place sadly he "put down the pin" indefinetly. I have been considering asking for a beta for this story which would hpefully get rid of that problem.