Hey, this is pretty good. But if I may make some observations? Perhapse a bit of dialouge a bit sooner in the story may help the reader get a better feel for the characters, also, check your spelling on a couple of places. But I do like this a lot, can't wait for more. Good job...
Life's a song, sing along.-Lady Lacrymosa
Author's response
Thanks for the input, I went back and made some changes so if you get the urge feel free to have a look and see what you think. I also encourage you to check out some of my other stories I have quite a few