S'gud stuff :) But 'cos I'm an absolute bastard I had to point some stuff out 'cos I'm just picky about grammar and the like.
The sun had shined extremely bright
'shined' should be shone.
Ashley Banez observed the cold body that layed silently
'layed' should be lay. Also, if it's a dead body it ain't gonna be making much noise...
she justed wished he was alive to see her living it.
'justed' should be just
She walked full circle around Lisa
Could do with an 'a' or 'in a' after walked
She sat down and breathed deep.
'deep' should probably be deeply.
Author's response
no it's okay lol. I'm the same way.
But I don't have Micorsoft so I can't tell the difference on Notepad :/ But thank I appreciate it :P