Review for Heir of Sword and Stave

Heir of Sword and Stave

(#) siledubhghlase 2010-07-14

Jimk's out of his gourd. This story is far from a farce--it's actually been rather fun to read...especially THIS chapter. He's got Draco all freaked out about his sexuality and the screaming is sure to have alerted the entire train! HILARIOUS!

I'm really sad that you're bashing Ron. sniff I'm a Ron-fan. I hope you redeem him...please? With hot fudge and a cherry on top? Even if you don't, I'll continue to read anyway.

I see you have the common issue with who and whom. "Who" is a preposition--a clarification word; "whom" is an object word which follows common prepositions like "in, on, of, from, for, to, at, about, before, after"--you understand. So in your paragraph about Harry remembering who Draco is, you should have used "who" instead of "whom" in each case.

Otherwise...GOOD JOB!!!

Author's response

Ron will get redeemed, but I'm afraid to say Harry and he won't be friends, more like "not enemies".

thanks for the tips on "who"s and "whom"s, that's a problem that never occurred to me.