I think the story is great. The plot is very good. The only problem I see is it moves very fast. If you took longer to develope the story (flesh everything out more) it could be abslutley fantastic. There are a few points that didn't really ring true for me, like Harry fainting & crying; Harry & Fluer making out in th street in the middle of a fight; Harry growing a foot in height. But those are small points. However I believe that the rule in fiction is that the only rules are what ever the author decdides. I don't mean any of this as flames, so please don't take it as such.
I like the pairing of H/F, but would have liked seeing them take longer to decide they were in glourious love, than the 5 min. it seemed like.
So for me, if you slowed your pace some, & provided more insight, even at the risk of taking longer it will work better. It seems that the longer the story goes, the better your writting gets. Thanks for a grat story, & please don't give up.