Have you ever read The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy? If so, remember rule number one. If not, here is rule Number one:
DON'T PANIC.
You sound deeper in the Black than I ever was. Shit, kid. What the hell happened? If music isn't doing it anymore, then find something else. Find small joys in small things, as fucktastic as that sounds. Like microwave popcorn.
Microwave popcorn is honestly the best thing ever. Just stick a flat packet of seeds into a microwave, wait three minutes, and hey presto, a warm bag of buttery goodness.
Take it one day at a time. Do something that makes your day every day. That's how I did it. I've got the scars to prove it.
Jump on the bed. Buy yourself some bath crayons and just colour the hell outta your shower.
Best of all, find some extremely poorly written fanfics. For some reason, the complete lack of grammar and rational thought involved immediately makes you feel better.
Mmm, and join a martial arts thing. Beating the shit out of others is therapeutic.
So. What's rule number one?
DON'T PANIC.
And for the love of God, do not off yourself. NO. THAT IS BAD. NO SUICIDE YOU. One day at a time, okay? Baby steps.
I hope you did not say you don't matter. I call bullshit! What what what are you doing? You do so matter. You just don't realize it yet.
You still there? Leave! Begone! Go watch Monty Python, that's bound to perk you up in no time!
Send me a thingy if it gets worse, m'kay? I'll listen, I swear to God.