I've never been suicidal myself and I'm not really sure what to say right now but fuck it, you are MCRmy so I care about you please PLEASE go talk to someone right now, I don't care who it is but tell them to keep you company for at least a while, you shouldn't be alone right now and I know it sounds horrible and you may not want it but getting help may be for the best, they can help you lead a better life. I don't know you or your situation but I hope this helped and just understand that if you feel alone, you can always talk to me because I care about everyone having a good life including you
Molly x