Been a good stoy . The ending was a little anticlimatic but still ok. I wish I had more usefull information to help you with writting. But this story is not to be taken seriously and to be injoyed for what it is.
Well that is what I think.
The big thing that has influenced me is the script style. I think I am going to write a stand alone story like this. Based on a character in the online story I am writing.
Thanks for the injoyable read.