Review for Deviant

Deviant

(#) gucci84 2007-03-15

So cute. "I'll pick you up in the living room." Could you imagine him pulling up with a scooter or something cause a car can't fit through any doors? Haha.

Good stuff. More details to their surroundings would add to the effect (like what the kitchen looks like, or the sounds they hear). I like how you let us know what Julius thought about Delilah's behavior. Makes us wonder about his little jealousy organ. If that even exists. I know mine does. snorts

Oh and just noticed this: 'twords' is not a word. It's 'towards'. I pronounce it 'twords' too, but I got slapped on the hands for writing it that way once.

I keep wondering what this guy's life background is. Hope we get to find out during their 'date' Coughjuliuswillflipcough

Divachick34 - A review of this story, is probably more appropriate than commenting on your own, unless you are Delilah-Juliuswriter and this is your story...(Is confused between all authors) Sorry, just wouldn't like for someone to write something like that in my reviews without at least giving some constructive criticism.

I didn't catch any capitalizations like Darks did. I guess she's got more of an eye for things like that. And like Darks said: Update soon!

-Gucci84

Author's response

sorry about any spelling/grammar mistakes I'm only 13 years old. And yes I am both divachick34 and Delilah-Juliuswriter. And thank you I will be going into more detail now:) And I can tell you that Julius is going to be heart broken when he finds out Delilah's got a date.

-Delilah-Juliuswriter:)