FicWad

Having bored of waiting for Steven to return and being too stubborn to return to his room and face Axl, Slash decided to inject some junk and polish off the whiskey. When Steven eventually returned an hour and a half later, Slash was fast asleep. Steven stood for a moment looking from one guitarist to the other before rummaging around the room. Wonderful, he thought. They didn't even leave any junk or whiskey for him.
"Izzy," he poked his lover with his foot.
"Come on man," he whined, "Wake up,"
He turned to Slash and kicked him. Slash muttered something inaudible and turned away.
"Guys," Steven's voice was growing increasingly whiney, "Come on, wake up."
He tried kicking them again, but to no avail. Izzy mumbled something that sounded like 'fuck off' and Slash simply grunted.
"Go fuck yourselves," Steven spat.
He left the room in search of alternative amusement. He found Duff and Axl in a bar down the road.
"Izzy and Slash are passed out and we have a gig in two hours," Steven announced, dropping down on a seat beside Axl, who was staring into space. Duff, who was examining his drink, barely glanced up when the drummer appeared.
"Are you listening to me?" Steven asked. Axl grunted a response.
"Come on man," Steven poked him, "Don't go all Izzy on me,"
"What do you mean 'all Izzy'? Duff asked, looking up from his drink.
"That's what Izzy does," Steven explained, "Always brooding. Staring into space. Ignoring me. He's too distant,"
"Or maybe you're too fucking clingy," Axl said quietly, still staring into the distance, "Always talking, making noise. Always needing attention. Izzy likes his space. To brood,"
Steven stared at Axl for a minute in disbelief.
"You're just jealous that he's with me and not you," Steven said finally.
Axl paled slightly.
"Uh Steve?" Duff began "Maybe you shouldn't..."
"What did you say?" Axl turned to him, cutting off Duff.
"You heard me," Steven replied, "I've heard you talking to him that night in the kitchen. I saw you kiss him. You're in love with him but he doesn't want you. He wants me. So back off and mind your own fuckin...."
Axl cut Steven off by punching him in the mouth.
"Guys.." Duff began again as Axl stood up.
"It's ok I'm leaving. To hell with the gig." Axl snapped. He slammed some coins down on the table.
"That's for the beer,"he said, storming out.
Steven sat back down and rubbed his cheek. Duff glared at him.
"Well done," Duff stood up, "Now we've only got a bassist and a drummer. This gig will rock,"
"Duff..." Steven began.
Duff threw some coins onto the table.
"Steve...just...fucking behave yourself," Duff said finally, "I've gotta try and wake up Slash and Izzy.
Steven sighed deeply, watching Duff leave.

Duff let himself into Steven's motel room and surveyed the scene with his hands on his hips. It looked like a bomb had hit it. Amidst the chaos of bedclothes, t-shirts, jeans, beer bottles, needles and condoms, the two guitarists lay side by side snoring. Duff decided to wake Izzy first. He'd need his help to wake Slash.
"Izzy," Duff crouched down beside him and shook him gently, "Yo Stradlin,"
He slapped him hard on each cheek.
"Wha...." Izzy blinked groggily, trying to connect the pain in his face with the blurry bassist above him.
"Why the fuck did you hit me?" he demanded, the pieces suddenly slipping into place.
"Time to wake up man," Duff grinned at him. I
Izzy sat up and rubbed his eyes. His head hurt. He looked at Duff grinning. He was too fucking cheerful, and very hot when he grinned like that, with his hair tumbling into his eyes.
"Anyway man," Duff continued, oblivious, "Axl and Steven had a fight and now Axl's refusing to sing,"
"Shit," Izzy looked around for his cigarettes, "What was it about this time?"
Izzy found a stray cigarette and popped it into his mouth, while fumbling for a lighter.
"Steve overheard you two," Duff said, throwing him a box of matches, "Knows Axl is in love with you but you're not interested. He really rubbed it in,"
"He said he knows I'm not interested?" Izzy asked
"Yup," Duff lit a cigarette.
Izzy inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly. He didn't speak for a while.
"As long as Steven thinks that," Izzy said finally, "Then everything is cool,"
"Dude, are you in love with Axl?" Duff asked in amazement.
Izzy looked at him for a moment. He couldn't be trusted. He'd get wasted, he'd spill it all out to Axl.
"Let's wake Slash," he said, changing the subject.
Duff stared at him for a moment but decided not to push the issue,
"Alright then," he said eventually.

Axl wandered the street with his head down and his hands shoved deep in his pockets. Who the fuck did Adler think he was? Who the hell was he to flaunt his relationship in Axl's face? HIs relationship wasn't all that great. Izzy had practically admitted that he wanted Axl back at the gas station. He was clearly only making do with Steven because he was too stubborn to admit his feelings for AXl. Well he could go to hell. They all could. He didn't need them. They could fuck themselves if they thought he was going to sing with them after the way he'd been treated. Another thought occurred to Axl. Steven had said that Izzy was acting very broody. This could be good for Axl. If Izzy was broody it meant that he was annoyed or upset about something. And when he was like that, there was only ever one person that he'd talk to. Axl smiled to himself. Perhaps he should go to the gig. IT could be interesting. He'd show Steven who Izzy was closer to.
But while he smiled, another realization was worming its way into his head. Steven was his friend. One of his best friends. He couldn't do that to him.He wanted to but he couldn't. He loved Steven too much as a friend. He kicked over a bin in temper, hating himself for being so damn soft. Sighing deeply, Axl turned back in the direction of the pub they were playing at. Anyway, he consoled himself. Slash would be there. If all came to all, he could fuck him.

In a tiny room at the back of the pub, the rest of the band were preparing for the gig. Izzy and Duff were tuning their guitars, Slash was practicing a riff and Steven was watching Izzy.
"What?" Izzy looked up irritably, "Why are you staring at me?"
He was stressed out. He couldn't stop thinking about Axl. He wanted him badly. He was confused and Steven wasn't helping. He loved Steven too. He was in love with Steven. So why couldn't Steven be enough for him?
"I like staring at you," Steven answered, with a grin.
"Well don't," Izzy mumbled, returning to his guitar.
Why couldn't he commit to Steven. Why did he need Axl so badly.
Steven looked down at his drumsticks. He tapped out a beat softly on his knees and then returned to watching Izzy. Izzy sighed deeply.
"Couldn't you, like, tune your drums, or something?"
Steven shrugged innocently and giggled, blond hair tumbling into his eyes. Izzy sighed, Steven had obviously had one too many drinks. He smiled at the drummer. He was ditsy, but loveable. Izzy could never hurt him. No matter what happened. He loved him too much. Izzy smiled at him.
'Fine," he said in mock annoyance, "Stare if you must,"
"That's the top you wore the first night we fucked," Steven pointed out, "You wore those jeans the following day when you went after Axl."
Izzy stopped and looked up, blushing slightly as Duff and Slash tried not to snigger.
'You...remember that?" he asked softly.
Steven nodded, smiling.
"Well I guess I'll have to put more thought into my clothes if I'm gonna be forever engrained in your memory," Izzy remarked, blushing.
Izzy went back to his guitar, but, conscious of Steven's eyes boring into him, he found it impossible to concentrate. Hearing the sound of rattling paper, he looked up. Steven was swallowing a tablet with some vodka. "What's that?" Izzy asked, putting down his guitar.
"Ecstasy," Steven answered, "Want some?"
"Yeah, give it here,"
Steven passed the tablets and vodka over to Izzy, who took two and downed them with vodka.
"Woah, two?" Duff sniggered, "You'll be out of it, man. At least it'll pick you up,"
Izzy looked at him.
"I don't need to be picked up," he said, "I'm fine,"
"Dude," Slash spoke up, "You've been on a downer since we got here. You need to be picked up. Anyway, ecstasy helps your, like, feelings, you know? The love drug,"
Izzy raised an eyebrow and lit a cigarette. Maybe it could help him to confront Axl. He downed the end of the vodka. He could feel himself relaxing slightly already.
Steven moved closer to him and wrapped an arm around him.
"Love you," he whispered, drunkenly. He kissed Izzy on the cheek.
"Get a fuckin room," Duff sniggered.
"Which of you is singing?" Slash asked.
Izzy shrugged, returning Steven's kiss. He didn't really care. He could feel the tablets taking effect. He felt relaxed, full of love. For Steven, for Axl, for everyone. He wanted to love everyone. To make love to everyone. Perhaps he could.
"I'll sing," Duff volunteered, trying to ignore Steven and Izzy kissing and giggling in the corner.
"No need," Axl appeared in the doorway.
"Axl's here," Izzy proclaimed in a delighted tone.
Axl raised an eyebrow. He hadn't expected such a warm welcome from Izzy.
"He's very happy," he remarked, as Izzy and Steven dissolved into giggles again.
"They're high," Duff told him, "Ecstasy. And a shit load of vodka,"
"Ah," Axl understood, "The love drug,"
Steven whispered something to Izzy, who snorted.
"Duff, Izzy and I are in love with you," Steven said, giving the bassist a cuddle, "You're really hot.Love Slash too,"
Steven kissed Duff on the cheek. Duff smiled uncomfortably, untangling himself from the drunken drummer.
Axl rolled his eyes. Perfect. Just perfect They were both stoned. Now they couldn't have the heart to heart he'd been planning. Why should he even bother to make an effort?


After the gig, Axl found himself alone. Duff and Slash had left with some chick, Susan something or other. Steven and Izzy had quite literally disappeared. He sighed and lit a cigarette, stepping outside. Nearby, Izzy was propped up against a wall, giggling softly. Axl went and stood beside him.
"Hey man," he said softly, "Where's lover boy?"
"Dunno," Izzy giggled, "Disappeared. Funny, huh?"
"Yup," Axl sighed deeply, "Hilarious,"
"Adler," Izzy sighed, "Fucking brilliant name,"
"Fabulous," Axl muttered bitterly. This was not how he had intended their heart to heart to go.
"Look Izzy we need..."
Axl was cut off when Izzy began laughing hysterically. He doubled over tears streaming down his face. After watching for a moment, Axl lost his patience.
"Finished?" Axl snapped
"Oooh man," Izzy wiped away a tear, "Think so,"
"What's so fuckin funny?" Axl demanded.
"If Steven and I got married, I'd be Izzy Adler," Izzy laughed again.
"Or he'd be Steven Stradlin," Axl pointed out crossly, but this made Izzy laugh even harder. Eventually he sank onto the ground.
"Axl come sit with me,: Izzy patted the ground beside him. Axl sat down sighing.
"You're wasted," Axl pointed out.
Izzy gave a quiet laugh. Axl felt his stomach flip slightly as Izzy brushed off him while rooting for a cigarette. Once located, he lit up and inhaled.
"Yeah," he acknowledged, "I'm completely fucking wasted. I shouldn't have taken so much shit. I can barely stand. I don't know where Adler is. I don't know where I am, where the motel is,"
"Well it's ok," Axl said, "I'm sober. I'll bring you back to the motel,"
Izzy put his head on Axl's shoulder.
"I'm sleepy," he told Axl, "And I'm cold,"
Axl took off his jacket and put it around the guitarist's shoulders. They said nothing for a few minutes. Izzy was so quiet that Axl had decided he must have dozed off and was contemplating how to get him back to the motel when Izzy spoke.
"Axl?"
What's up man?"
"I love you,"
Axl swallowed.
"Izzy..." he began.
"No, Axl don't," Izzy cut him off, "I do. I love you. I've been trying to deny it but I love you. I don't want to. I love Steven so so much. BUt I love you too and I can't make it go away. I know you love me. You've told me often enough,"
Axl was quiet for a moment. Then he stood up
"I love you too," he said, "But you're wasted. I can't. It's not fair,"
Axl began walking away. He didn't want to hurt Steven. He couldn't do that to him.
"I don't care," Izzy stood up and stumbled after Axl, grabbing his wrist to pull him back, "I love you. I need you, kiss me,"
"Adler..."
"Doesn't ever have to find out. I can do this and be with Adler. It'll all be cool,"
Izzy pulled Axl to him and began kissing him passionately, biting and pulling at his lips until they opened. He stuck his tongue in, exploring the contours of Axl's mouth. Unable to resist any longer, Axl kissed Izzy back hungrily. As he kissed him, he could feel his worries melting away. It didn't matter. Nothing did. IF they were meant to be together it would work itself out