FicWad

---

"Got it!" exclaimed Anya, hanging up the Magic Box's shop phone. She danced over to the table, where Xander and Jonathan were researching. She frowned, looking around. "Where are the other guys?"

"Oh, they're working on some gadget over at Warren's place," said Jonathan.

"What've you got?" asked Xander. He couldn't help smiling at her enthusiasm.

"Your sorcerer!" she grinned. "The one who's looking for the Chraka Rathklo. I just got a call from Jenni. She's the witch who works in the Water Department and likes to spend lots of money on her ingredients?" Jonathan looked blank and Xander shook his head. Anya shrugged. "Anyway, when she came in here to pick up the newt's eyes she'd special-ordered from England, I asked if she'd heard anything about new sorcerers in town. She hadn't, but she just called to tell me that her brother's girlfriend's best friend works at this club downtown where these guys hang out, and everyone's talking about some new guy who's been poking around, asking for information on your thingy."

"Great! Good job, honey," said Xander. "What did you find out?"

Anya's smile slipped a little. "That there's a new guy in town, asking for information."

"Oh. That's good," Xander said encouragingly. Jonathan nodded.

"Oh!" she exclaimed. "There was a name, too. 'Thorn Magenblod.'"

Jonathan frowned. "Sounds powerful."

Anya shrugged. "They all give themselves names like that. I knew a warlock named 'Bloodwin Thunderdark.' His real name was Marvin Griffith. Skinny guy with glasses, and red hair that always stuck out in odd directions."

They all laughed. "Bet he was a real wimp, too," said Jonathan.

"Oh, no," Anya shook her head. "He used to impale people who laughed at him on ten-foot stakes in front of his mansion. I think that's why he changed his name, actually. Kept running out of stakes, and the hellhounds could only eat so much flesh a week."

Jonathan and Xander's smiles faded.

"That's helpful, though, right? The name?" she asked hopefully.

"Yes," said Xander. He thought his voice might have cracked, so he cleared his throat. "Yes. Any information is good." Anya smiled and returned to the store counter, where a customer was waiting for help.

Xander and Jonathan stared at their books in silence for a few minutes. Finally, Jonathan spoke. "I could try the tracking spell we talked about. If we found the Chraka and destroyed it, we'd never have to deal with this sorcerer."

Xander nodded. "Sounds like a plan. Do you have all the supplies you need?"

"Pretty much. There's one herb I had to order, but Anya says it should be in by tomorrow."

"Good," said Xander. "We'll tell Warren and Andrew when we meet up with them later."



"You're like, our Q," said Andrew in amazement. Warren grinned.

"It's only the beta version," he said, holding up the new UV-Blaster. "I don't know exactly what components of sunlight actually make vampires burn, so we'll have to test it."

"Cool! When Xander and Jonathan get here, we can take it on patrol," said Andrew.

"We could," said Warren. "Or we could go by ourselves, now."

"Without backup?" Andrew said doubtfully. After a few nights of patrolling, Andrew suspected that Xander was the only one of them that really knew what he was doing.

"Hey, I'm not talking about taking on a nest. We just need a test subject, and they're busy doing the research thing." Andrew still looked unsure. Warren added, "One vamp, Andrew. Look, if you're scared, I can just do it myself."

"I'm not scared!" lied Andrew.

"Ok, then. Let's go," said Warren.




After checking the obituaries, they decided to stake out (so to speak) Restfield Cemetery. According to the newspaper, several people had been buried there that afternoon, after dying of "severe neck rupture". Warren said multiple corpses increased the odds that they'd encounter a vampire, since not all vamps turned their victims. Andrew thought multiple corpses increased the chances of multiple vampires, but he didn't want to argue with Warren. They donned their battle gear. The Super Soaker hadn't been replaced yet, and Warren wouldn't let Andrew use a crossbow ("You shot me in the ear with the water gun. You think I'm gonna let you use projectiles?") so Andrew just loaded up a stake bandolier. Warren, of course, had the UV-Blaster.

They arrived at the cemetery, weapons ready, and waited for the vampires to rise from the grave. And waited. And waited some more. After an hour or so of standing at attention, ready for trouble, they started getting bored. Warren sat on a headstone and fiddled with the controls on the UV-Blaster. Andrew sat on the ground nearby and used a stake to sketch anime characters in the dirt.

"I wonder if vampires are like fish," said Andrew.

"Fish?" Warren was used to Andrew's non sequiturs, and barely looked up.

"Yeah. When you go fishing, you're supposed to be quiet, 'cause the fish can hear you. So maybe the vampires can hear us, and so they're not going to come up until we leave."

"Huh." Warren considered this, then shrugged. "I don't think they would care if we were waiting for them. They don't know that we-" He stopped, and looked at the ground below him. He raised his voice a little. "That we're here and helpless. Nice, tasty treats just full of hot, fresh blood." He kept his eyes on the ground. Andrew stopped drawing, and watched Warren stare at the grave. After a few minutes, Warren looked at Andrew and shrugged. Andrew relaxed, and resumed sketching.

"We need a cool name," Andrew said, after a few minutes. "Like the Fantastic Four, or the Justice League. I know! We can be the X-Men, 'cause Xander's our leader."

"He's not really the leader," scoffed Warren. "We're a team. And we should have an original name, not something from the comics."

"Ok, how about The Sunnydale Defenders?"

"Sounds like a football team."

"The Dark Knights?"

"Not original."

"Shadow Warriors?"

"Too anime-sounding."

"You come up with some names, then!" said Andrew.

Warren thought for a moment, and shrugged, "I don't know. The Quartet?"

"Boring. Oh! And what about uniforms?"

"We don't need uniforms," Warren said.

"Sure we do. We want people recognize us as a team," Andrew said.

"No one's going to see us except vampires," replied Warren.

"Someone might. Besides, we've got to protect our secret identities. And all the cool superheroes have uniforms."

"We've got our battle wear," said Warren.

Andrew shook his head. "Not cool enough."

"'What would you prefer? Yellow spandex?'" quoted Warren. He and Andrew looked at each other, and laughed. Just then a hand reached out of the ground and grabbed Warren's ankle. Warren screamed, and kicked, pulling his foot out of the vampire's grip. He hopped off the headstone, and backed away, pointing the UV-Blaster at the grave. Andrew jumped to his feet and held up his stake, ready for action.

Another hand punched its way out of the ground. Warren fired the UV-Blaster at the hands. Light flashed, but the hands were undamaged. Warren swore and adjusted a dial on the blaster. The hands grabbed the ground around them, and the vampire's head emerged from the grave, dirt sliding off its hair. Warren fired again. Another flash of light, but this time one of the hands caught fire. The vampire screamed, and the head and both hands disappeared back into the dirt. Warren waited, finger on the trigger of the blaster, but the vampire didn't reappear.

"Hey!" Warren walked over to the grave and kicked the dirt. "Come back!" He waited, but the vampire didn't reappear. "Andrew, dig him up."

"What, so he can bite me while you fix the blaster? You dig him up," said Andrew.

"The blaster works fine! But I can't hold it and dig at the same time."

"Okay, then I'll hold the blaster while you dig him up," said Andrew.

"No way. You'll break it."

"No I won't!"

"Yes you will! Anyway, it's my design. I-" A vampire came from behind Warren and grabbed him by the throat. Startled, he dropped the UV-Blaster and tried to pry the hand off his neck. Andrew couldn't help Warren, since he had been grabbed by a second vampire. The vamp brought his head closer and Andrew could smell fresh dirt and a faint odor of something rotten. He tried to scream, but the hand around his neck wouldn't let enough air through to make any noise. He kicked helplessly as the vampire lifted him off the ground, and gasped in pain when it sunk its teeth into his neck. Then he fell to the ground when the hand holding him crumbled to dust.

Warren's attacker was gone, too. Jonathan stood behind Warren holding a stake. Andrew turned around to see Xander standing behind him. Xander offered him a hand and helped him get to his feet.

"Thanks," said Andrew.



"What the hell were you thinking?" asked Xander as soon as they were back in Warren's basement.

"We were just doing a field test of the UV-Blaster," said Warren, putting the device in question on the table and dropping into a chair. Andrew sat in a nearby chair, holding his hand over his wound while Jonathan dug a first aid kit out of the cupboard.

"You took an untested weapon into battle, without any kind of backup," said Xander. Most of his army knowledge had faded away since the Halloween spell a few years back, but every now and then he felt pieces coming back. Or it could be all the army movies he watched.

"We had stakes," volunteered Andrew. "Ow!" Jonathan was cleaning his vampire bite with rubbing alcohol.

"Sorry," said Jonathan. "I gotta get all the vampire dust out."

"But you didn't even bother to wait for us. If Andrew hadn't left a note, we wouldn't even have known where you were," said Xander. "We're supposed to be a team. If we can't count on each other, than this won't work."

"That's right, we're a team. I don't need your permission to go patrolling. You're not the boss of me!" said Warren.

"Well, maybe he should be!" said Jonathan. Everyone turned to look at him. Jonathan backed down a little. "I mean, we should have a leader. All the good teams have one. And Xander's been doing this for years."

"Yeah, as a sidekick!" said Warren.

"Let's vote," said Jonathan. "Who wants Xander to be leader?" He raised his hand. After a moment, Andrew raised his hand too. The look Warren gave Andrew could have stripped the paint from the walls. But Andrew glared right back, and kept his hand up.

Xander didn't really want to be the leader. Responsibility was something he generally tried to avoid. But Jonathan had a point. Of the four of them, Xander was the most qualified to be in charge. And Xander really wanted this superhero team thing to work. Reluctantly, he raised his hand.

Warren looked around at all the votes for Xander. "Fine," he said. "Whatever." He spun around in his chair, bent over the UV-Blaster and started checking all the switches. The others lowered their hands.

"Okay, Xander's in charge," said Jonathan. He pulled bandages out of the first aid box and taped up Andrew's neck wound.

"Okay," Xander said. Now what? "Um, I guess we've done enough patrolling for tonight. We'll meet at the Magic Box tomorrow afternoon and if all the supplies are in, Jonathan'll do the tracking spell for the Chraka." Andrew and Jonathan nodded. Warren shrugged. "Uh, get some rest. It could be a long day tomorrow."

Jonathan finished bandaging Andrew's wound. "Hey, Xander, can you give me a ride home?" he asked.

"Sure," said Xander. Jonathan put away the first aid kit and left the basement with Xander.




Warren and Andrew sat in silence for a few minutes.

Finally Andrew spoke. "Are you mad at me?" He nervously fingered the bandage on his neck.

Warren didn't look up. "Look, Andrew, I need to go over the blaster and make sure nothing broke when it fell. I don't really have time to talk about my feelings. Why don't you just go home?"

"Yeah, okay," said Andrew. But he didn't move.

Finally Warren looked up from the blaster and sighed when he saw Andrew watching him. "No, I'm not mad at you. Just disappointed. We're partners! Like Batman and Robin. If we don't support each other, who's going to look out for us?"

"But we're a team! You and me and Xander and Jonathan-"

"Sure, but when we're on the front lines, it's just you and me. I have to be able to depend on you. Can I, Andrew? Or will you be running to Xander's side just when I need you most?"

"You can depend on me," Andrew said. "I promise."