Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Harry Potter And The Deathly Silence


by sammywrae 0 reviews

Category: Harry Potter - Rating: PG - Genres: Humor,Parody - Characters: Harry,Hermione,Voldemort - Published: 2008-07-02 - Updated: 2008-07-02 - 491 words - Complete


"Harry, my boy, I would like you to meet someone" Dumbledore had walked up behind Harry and Sally, and, when they turned, they saw him stood next to a somewhat portly man, a remarkably horse-faced woman and a boy of Harry's age, although Harry's first impression was somehow Hagrid had been sat on by an elephant.

"Headmaster" Harry nodded politely.

"I would like you to meet your Aunt Petunia Dursley, her husband Vernon, and their son Dudley" Dumbledore smiled benevolently "Since you appear to be making a lot of new friends today, I thought you might like the chance to reconnect with your family"

"Thank you sir" Harry turned, and saw Petunia staring down at him with a fond look on her face. He turned to Sally, and she nodded "Mrs Dursley..."

"You know - you look so much like your father, it's amazing"

"Thank you"

"But you really do have my sister's eyes"

"Actually, Mrs Dursley, that isn't true" Sally said. The woman turned and stared at her "Harry doesn't have his mother's eyes" She paused, then held up a jar containing two eyeballs "I do"

(a few moments later)

"Wow" Harry said, peering in to the distance "I really didn't think anyone could move that fast without a broom"

"Harry, Sally - was that really necessary?" Dumbledore asked with sadness in his voice.

"No, sir, it probably wasn't" Sally replied, but then smirked "But it was kind of fun"



"So, Voldie... can I call you Voldie?"

"Only if you want me to rip out your ribcage and wear it as a hat"

"So, Voldemort, we have about six hours to kill..."

"Really?" Voldemort smiled "Just think how many people we can kill in six hours!"

"So - we have six hours left before this day of rest comes to an end. What do you want to do now?"

"Well - I picked quidditch, so I think it's your turn"

"Oh" Harry looked around, realising that most of the crowd for the game was still there "Well... how about this..."

(a few moments later)

"And they say I am the most evil person the world" Voldemort shook his head "So - how do you want to do this?"

"I am glad you asked..."



"Assembled masses" The Sorting Hat's voice rang out across the stadium, drawing everyone's attention "If you would all kindly look to the north end of the pitch, I believe that our hosts have conjured up some more entertainment"

Everyone turned, to see a blinding flash of light fill the pitch. When it cleared, they saw Voldemort and Harry stood at the end of the pitch on a small stage that had appeared from nowhere. Behind them, there was a large white screen, and on one side of the stage there were a group of death eaters, and on the other, Hermione, Luna, Ginny and Sally.

Suddenly the stadium was filled with music...
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