Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Lost In Middle Earth

TIME 2v1 : Saruman's Abroad

by sammywrae 0 reviews

With The Fellowship in tatters, Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli go looking for their friends.....

Category: Harry Potter - Rating: PG - Genres: Humor,Parody - Characters: Draco,Harry,Hermione,Luna,Neville - Published: 2008-07-06 - Updated: 2008-07-06 - 2388 words - Complete

0Unrated
Since there was, apparently, some confusion, I thought I would clarify the situation.

Frodo (Hermione) and Sam (Harry) know who they are and what happens throughout the whole of the story. Gandalf (Luna) also knows who she is, and what happens. Or at least she did until she died.

Celeborn (James) and Galadriel (Lily) know who they are, but they only know what Celeborn and Galadriel should know.

At the end of the chapter, Merry (George), Pippin (Fred), Aragorn (Cedric), Legolas (Draco) and Gimli (Neville) found out who they were, but still only know what their characters know. And if Boromir (Percy) hadn't been killed, he probably would have found out as well. But since he died, he didn't.

It is entirely unclear whether Elrond (Dumbledore) knows or not.

Everyone else, including Bilbo (Molly), Glorfindel (Sirius) and Haldir (Remus) are still in the dark, and think they are their characters.

Hope that helps.

(Also - TIME is an acronym for Travels In Middle Earth, and I am using it because the full chapter titles won't fit, and because chapter titles can't have punctuation in)


xoxox

Previously on "Lost In Middle Earth" :- Hermione and Harry woke up in Bag End to find that Voldemort had trapped them in "Lord Of The Rings" (one of Hermione's favourite books). They find that other people have been brought in to help or hinder them, and are told by Luna (who has replaced Gandalf) that they must work through the book, to the end, in order to break the spell.

When we last left them, The Fellowship had broken, Fred and George had been kidnapped by Orcs, Hermione and Harry were setting off for Mordor, Cedric, Neville and Draco were wondering what they should do next, and Luna and Percy were somewhat dead.

And so now, the story continues...


xoxox

Cedric, Draco and Neville stared at the body of Percy, laying on the ground.

"So - we should bury him?" Neville asked.

"Why?" Draco asked "I mean - he tried to steal the ring, and nearly got Hermione killed" He saw the expression on his friends' faces, and smirked "I am not her biggest fan, but she is pretty much our only hope of getting out of this"

"But - we can't just leave him here" Cedric said "At the very least, lets stick him in a boat, and send him down the river"

"Okay - that's fair" Draco "I mean - he tried to sell us down the river. The least we can do is return the favour"

xoxox

Five minutes later, Percy was lying in a boat. Neville had suggested surrounding him with the weapons and helms of his fallen foes, but Draco vetoed that.

"You think I am going to get my hands all messy?"

So they simply laid him in a boat, and moved it down to the river.

"Anyone want to say anything?" Cedric asked. Both Draco and Neville shook their heads, so Cedric pushed the boat out.

They watched it go for a few minutes, then Cedric turned.

"Okay - we have a choice to make" He stared over the river "We can go after Hermione and Harry, and try to help them sneak in to Mordor"

"In the wilderness" Draco said "In the dark. With Nazgul on the far bank and orcs on this one" He smirked "I know you are supposed to be loyal, but this is just taking the piss"

"Then we should go after Fred and George" Neville said "They are alone out there, and they need our help" Draco stared at him in disbelief.

"We only just got rid of them" He laughed "I say good riddance. No more pranks, no more tricks - no more bloody singing!"

"So what do you suggest?" Cedric asked.

"We could go to Minas Tirith, as Weasley suggested" Draco replied "It sounded like they needed our help"

"And they will get it" Cedric said "But if we can't help Harry and Hermione, we have to save Fred and George" He sighed "Even if they bug the life out of us"

"Okay. Fine" Draco sighed "But don't blame me if they prank you the moment we find them"

xoxox

They returned to the clearing and looked around. Then Cedric turned to Draco.

"So, Master Elf, which way now?"

"Yonder" He pointed to where there were a lot of tracks on the ground "No one but orcs make a mess like that" He looked around "Hold on a moment..." He trailed off "Where are the horses?" Cedric smirked, as did Neville. Draco stared at them, then realised why they were smirking "We have to WALK?" Cedric nodded "But it's... it's..."

"A long way?" Neville asked, still smiling. Draco snarled a rude word.

"When I get hold of those damn hobbits..."

xoxox

There are several days of running, jumping, sprinting and resting as the three friends chase after the orcs.

xoxox

"Erm - guys?" Cedric slowed to a halt near the top of a hill "What's that?" They all followed his gaze to where a huge plume of smoke was billowing in to the air, then he turned to Draco "You have the best eyes"

"Why Ced, I didn't know you swung that way... ow! OW!" He turned and glared at Neville "I get why he slapped me, but why did you?"

"It looked like fun" Neville replied, then looked back "So - what is that?"

"Well - it appears to be a large plume of smoke billowing up from the plains" Draco said. The two of them stared at him "Oh - you wanted more?"

"If possible, yes"

"You should have said" Draco smirked, then peered into the distance "It's a bonfire of some type, but I can't tell what" He paused "And there are about fifty men on horses riding back down the orc trail towards us" He turned back "Should we go and say hello?" Neville turned to Cedric, who shrugged.

"I say we do it" Neville said.

"Gryffindors forward?" Draco sighed "I swear you two will be the death of me"

xoxox

"Ho-there" Cedric yelled out.as the horsemen rode up to them. The leader of the riders turned, and then pulled his horse up.

"Who are you who walk in the land of Rohan without leave of The King?" Cedric stared at him, then turned to Neville.

"Anyone you know?"

"Fred's oldest brother" Neville whispered "If the past is anything to go by, he is probably on our side"

"Thanks" Cedric turned back "I will tell you my name, but first tell me - who's side are you on?"

"We are on our own side, but if you ask who we serve, we serve my father, King Theoden of Rohan. I am Eomer" Cedric paused for a moment, then nodded.

"Then my name is Aragorn, son of Arathorn, the heir of Isildur" He smiled.

"Pull the other one" Bill smirked down at him "If you are going to be a spy in a foreign land, you should at least pick someone who isn't a fairy tale"

"He is" Draco said "Seriously"

"If he was the heir of Isildur, wouldn't he have the famous sword?" Bill asked.

"You mean like this" Cedric drew Anduril and let it shine in the sun.

"Yes - like that" Bill stared for a moment "Well... bugger me"

xoxox

"So you killed the orcs?"

"Yes"

"And burned the orcs?"

"Yes"

"And then you burned the ashes of the orcs?"

"Yes"

"Wow" Cedric said "You really don't like orcs, do you?"

"Not so much" Bill replied "But we didn't see any kids in there"

"How about annoying, fat little hobbits?" Draco asked.

"Nope" Bill paused "We might have burned them" The three friends stared at him "Hey - there were a lot of corpses"

"Swell" Neville said.

"Or they might have escaped in to Fangorn Forest" Bill shivered.

"What's so bad about that?" Draco asked.

"There are... scary things in there" Bill shivered again "For years it has been forbidden for our people" He looked around "It is also said that Saruman is abroad. That he wanders hither and thither, and that he has taken the disguise of Gandalf"

"So when they say Saruman is abroad they really mean it?" Draco smirked.

"Come on guys" Cedric said "We have to go"

xoxox

Ten minutes later, the three travelers were on horseback, and preparing to ride up the orc trail to search of their friends.

"I never thought I'd be grateful to a Weasley" Draco muttered quietly, but apparently not quietly enough as Neville slapped him on his arm.

"Draco - be nice" He whispered back.

"Thank you for these horses, Eomer" Cedric said. Bill nodded.

"You are welcome, but I would ask that, if you find your friends, you would come to The Golden Hall and show my father I am not the useless prat he thinks I am"

"Of course we will" He noticed the look of doubt on Bill's face "You don't trust us?"

"Oh - it's not that" Bill shrugged "I just don't think you will come out of the forest alive"

"Well - thank you for that as well" Cedric smirked, then turned to the other two "Lets go"

xoxox

"So - do either of you know what you are looking for?" Neville asked. They had arrived at the remains of the bonfire, and were now surrounded by lots of orc-briquettes.

"Well - the cloaks of Lorien are fire-resistant" Draco said. They both stared at him "Well - last year, during the Mid-Summer celebrations, Galadriel wanted to try out a new barbecue recipe for oliphant stakes, and... it didn't end well" They were still staring at him "But, as I was saying, if the hobbits had been torched, then the cloaks would still be around"

"True" Neville leaned over and picked up a piece of armour "What's this symbol?"

"The Silver Hand" Cedric replied "It means there were Saruman's orcs, not orcs of Sauron, who uses the sign of the Black Skull" He looked around "So - if they weren't here during the cook-out, then..."

"They went in to the forest"

"Seems so" Draco stared at the dark wood beyond them "Can I just suggest the going to Minas Tirith plan again?"

"No" Cedric smirked "And aren't elves supposed to be tree-huggers?"

"I am all for hugging trees" Neville added.

"Until the trees start hugging back" Draco replied "There are stories..."

"Look - we are going in there, all three of us" Cedric stamped his foot "I know we all would prefer that Fred and George were a long way from us, but we came this far, and I am not going to stop hunting them until I know they are dead" Draco and Neville both burst out laughing "Oh - you know what I mean"

xoxox

They had been exploring the forest for half an hour when Draco stopped.

"Can you hear that?"

"What?" The other two tried to listen, but couldn't hear anything.

"I am sure I can here singing"

"If you go down to the woods today"

"You are imagining it" Cedric whispered "Who would be singing in these woods?"

"You're sure for a big surprise"

"Maybe it's those hugging trees Draco mentioned" Neville said with a smirk.

"If you go down to the woods today"

"What if... what if it's Saruman?" Draco asked "Bill did say he was wandering around"

"You'll never believe your eyes"

"Look!!" The three turned to follow Cedric's finger, and saw a figure robed in white, stood on a rock a little way away.

"Greetings" The figure said in a calm voice.

"Stay there" Cedric raised his sword, and a moment later both Draco and Neville followed suit.

"Away put your weapons" The figure continued "I mean you no harm"

"And we know that how?" Neville asked "You are in this forest, sneaking around - why should we trust you?"

"You ask me to trust you? The Lion and Badger who consort with the Snake?"

"Pardon?"

"Well - it's clear why the hat didn't put you three in Ravenclaw at least" The figure took a step towards them, and they took a step back.

"Stay back!"

"Do you not know who I am yet?" The figure asked in an amused voice.

"Yes! You are Saruman The White"

"Close" The figure flung off the hood covering its face "But no cigar"

"Gandalf?"

"Gandalf?"

"Gandalf?"

"I'm only a model" She smirked, then, at the looks on their faces, she sighed "Does no one watch Monty Python any more?"

xoxox

Following in Luna's wake, the three friends make their way back to the edge of the forest.

"So - how did you fair with your fight with the snorkack?" Neville asked.

"Name him not" Luna shuddered.

"I can't call him 'He-who-must-not-be-named'" Neville moaned "That will just get confusing"

"Oh - I never thought of that" She paused "Call him Cecil"

"So - how did you fair with your fight with... Cecil?" Neville asked.

"Oh - you know, falling, clutching, hewing, more falling - the usual" She shivered again "In the end I got really tired of it, so I threw him off a cliff"

"Seriously?"

"Yeah" She smiled "So - what's been happening while I've been gone? Where are Frodo and Sam? And Merry and Pippin? And Boromir?"

"Well..." Cedric trailed off "It's a long story"

xoxox

"I leave you alone for five minutes and you lose four hobbits and the prince of Gondor?" Luna stared at them in disbelief "Good god" She looked out "Well - there's nothing to be done now. We have to go to Edoras"

"What about Fred and George?" Neville asked.

"They are with a friend of mine" Luna smiled "They'll be okay for a little while"

"And you didn't mention this before because..."

"I wanted to teach you a lesson about what happens when you lose hobbits" Luna said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world "So - come on" She ran out in to the field and jumped on to the back of Shadowfax. The others followed suit, although, since they all wanted to have children later, they didn't jump on to their horses with quite as much speed as Luna had, then they all set off across the plains.
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