Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
The Album
14 reviewsThe Harmony (Harry/Hermione) version of the last book. Hermione thinks twice about her decisions and Harry realizes he is in a war, and all enemies are a target, not just Voldemort.
5Exciting
Reviews
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
(#) fubar 2009-01-06
I really like how you develop the internal reasoning of Hermione as they are well thought out and believable. Something you can't say about 99% of the stories here.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
(#) paulblay 2009-07-27
A reasonable start, but a couple of sentences are rather messed up.
"Curiosity overwhelming the broken mirror and falsities of his favorite headmaster from the delusioned reporter, he grabbed the wrapped gift."
Leaving aside 'he grabbed the wrapped gift' what the heck does the rest of that sentence mean?
"She had just closed up the memories of anything involving her of her parents and left them in Australia, for their safety."
OK I know what you mean in that sentence, but it is very confused.
"She had just blocked her parents memories of anything involving her and left them in Australia, for their safety."
That's a little clearer, but we can probably do better.
"She had just left her parents in Australia for their safety after blocking their memories of anything involving her."Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
(#) kelwin 2012-06-24
one day i will find a romance fic where the author does not try to get them together as soon as possible. feelings have to grow they don't just appear and you have to remember before this fic he had no feelings for her that were more than just friends. also i don't see the point of this album. why would she get such a good album and slip it in to his trunk where he may or may not find it.it is very strange as really she should not be looking in his trunk as it is privet. i might try to read this another time but not now. i have just read too many bad romance fics lately and i am un easy about another.Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
(#) Zucht 2012-07-16
I really like this story you've started. The talking photo album is brilliant! The fight between Hrmione and Ginny was tense and exciting and a bit confusing at the end (the wink).
Three things:
1. your A/Ns are too long.
2. if you have to explain a story point in your A/Ns, you need to delete the A/N and fix the story point.
3. you said that you're going canon in the next chapter... why? I've read the book, listened to the audio book, seen the movies... So why should I read fanfiction that is just the same? It's boring!! Please think on that.Author's response
1. I like long A/Ns. Just like I love long replies. They are just Notes. You can ignore them if you want.
2. In order for Harry to go in-depth think about the date, he would need a calendar. Which I doubt he has. And he can't exactly consult his own Lexicon website. And Narrators shouldn't have their own monologues.
3. The first five chapters of the story, I'm following through canon's perspective. Everything happens, with different reactions from Harry and Hermione. Wouldn't you like to know how he would respond to certain things if he were... well, smarter?
Sixth chapter, everything changes. Of course, you'd be missing A LOT in-between. But, of course, I could tell you what you missed in an author's note.
Deathly Hallows: Take Two - a second take on Deathly Hallows. There wasn't supposed to be so much of a change. I said in the beginning that it's mainly for those who hadn't read Deathl Hallows, although that changes as the story goes on. I suppose some would be confused at some parts.
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